What’s on your mind? The Haven version.

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Not everyone who drinks becomes incapable of keeping secrets.

A lot of people use being drunk as an excuse to do things they're too inhibited to do while sober, and exaggerate the loss of inhibition alcohol causes because they believe they'll get away with the behaviour so long as they claim they were drunk.

My partner did spill a secret when he was drunk once, and I wasn't happy. Before I met my partner I used to see this guy who was married but I didn't know he was married at the time until I found out on Facebook, but to cut a long story short he obviously didn't want anyone to know and neither did I. My partner used to work with him, and I obviously told my partner because I didn't like to keep secrets like that from him, and I trusted him and he respected that. But then when he once met up with the bloke's son they went drinking together and my partner drunkenly told me that he'd told the son about it. I wasn't happy, as I especially didn't want anyone in the bloke's family to know. But it was a long time ago now and I think everyone's forgotten about it. My partner regretted it once he sobered up.

I thought back to that annoying college roommate and realized that he lied for good relationships, and that the other roommates helped him lie for good relationships. They just didn't care about lying.
Another roommate who wronged me in this matter did it on purpose. His purpose was to maintain a good relationship.He was not unaware of my demands.

I feel really mean when telling the truth sometimes, but there are instances where you just have to be honest and have to try to wake a person up from their delusions.

Understandable. My inner people-pleaser s**ts the bed sometimes when I'm being honest and blunt with someone on something that might hurt their feelings but needs to be said.

So I lock 'im in a box and try to ignore the freak out.

It's bad enough that my sleeping patterns have gone haywire since daylights savings and it's socially unacceptable for people to be night owls, but every day when I do wake up there's some new horror in the world. What's the point of anyone going on living if the world is such a irredeemable mess? I had an awful time trying to get to sleep last night (early morning, technically). My feet always feel like they're falling asleep for some reason when they go to bed, even after I take off my socks. My left ear wouldn't stop popping. And when I do fall asleep I wake up later with pulsing, wheezing sounds that feel like they're coming from inside my brain. I just know I'm going to get diabetes or cancer or Parkison's or some other horrible disease. And then when I finally get up and go to my computer the first thing I see is mention of a 6th mass extinction. Maybe humans should all just extinct themselves. IHML

I think I have inner ear tumors.

Tinnitus is a more likely explanation. I get that a lot: ringing or buzzing in the ears, and doctors aren't really sure what causes it. Can be annoying but I've learned to live with it.

Oh mate I need someone to put me straight from time to time

The past few weeks have been the darkest of my life since my trauma years.

Sometimes I really do hate this world.

I've been kind of blue lately over how I just don't have the sharpness to both figure out all the silent, unspeakable, unexplainable, uninteresting horses**t mindgames everyone around me is intent on playing, and, like some bright eyed and bushy-tailed squirrel, willfully participate with eagerness to act my part that they silently want me to act. And then they get upset if I don't.

On my mind... firstly thank you for your posts here, they are helpful in that I can see myself in many of them.

Currently on my mind:
- My kids as per usual they and their stressors in their life take up much of my brain, as I am someone with an innate focus on solutions, their anxieties, conflicts and little life drama's worry me much much more than they should.
But honestly... As much as this is the uniquely identifiable root cause of my personal stress, they are also at the root of all that I deem valuable about my life. so thank god for their issues

kr,
Kada

I think it's not fair that I was treated as if I was a dog when I was a child and growing up
But because sometimes I pretend to be a dog I also think it's funny and I get quite a lot of comfort from it as well

Can you see my predicament

i feel like a parasite in Gen Z-aimed spaces for autistic people.

I have to change my behaviour and that's not easy because in order to do that I have to face certain truths about my life