NTAndrew wrote:
Sweetleaf wrote:
NTAndrew wrote:
Sweetleaf wrote:
...but I found somehwhere that can maybe asses what mental disorders I have and suggest therapy so maybe they could help me find one with free or cheap services that has experiance with people that have my issues.
That sounds promising. I think a diagnosis is a good start.
yeah I suppose so.Here's a nosy question. Have you known anything besides pain?
Not really.For me, clinical depressions go back as far as I can remember, before I even knew it had a name. On the other hand, a friend of mine can trace his Manic Depression (he hates the label Bi-polar) back to the 7th grade when he was bullied. Before that, he was a pretty happy kid.
Yeah same here I don't really remember a time before I was depressed and anxious.
Yeah. I was hoping you wouldn't say that. I wouldn't wish this on anyone.
I remember when I went on tricyclics a long time ago. My depression lifted...and I sort of missed it! The drugs were real hard on me though, so I had to switch to something else. I remember the exact moment when I realized I was depressed again. I was in New York, visiting friends, and I was looking at a sculpture of a fish. It was almost a physical feeling, like going down in an elevator. I'm nobody noticed when I bottomed out. I am pretty good at hiding my moods.
I never felt that good again...until my brief flirtation with Ritalin.
Depression is a physical feeling for me as well. I can sometimes feel it behind my eyes. It's like a heavy weight lodged deep inside me. I could notice the utter that weariness descending on me, like drowning in the ocean with waves crashing over me. Stimulants do seem to relieve that feeling at least. I used to drink a lot of coffee and soda but that didn't make me feel very healthy.
I think I've been depressed to some degree ever since the age 13 or so. At that age when it first hits you it seems like you've hit some kind of existential epiphany, like "OMG, life is meaningless and everyone is so full of s**t".
12 Apr 2012, 9:09 pm
