Suicide attwmpt

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I'm sending a hug to you all. Thanks for being there.

Well that must have been a sh***y night for you, I had no internetz service, hope you are feeling better.

sorry I wasn't there for you.
I was having a bit of a sh***y time of it myself.
But I can tell you through long experience that the sh***y moments do pass and that these feelings go around in a cycle rather than heading towards a dead end, you just need to hold fast through the hard times, like you are doing right now.

How are you fifasy?

Morning Fifasy, yesterday sounds really rough I am so glad you had some good souls here to see you through. Please keep fighting and keep taking care of yourself...

As the good man Bukowski says: "You’re worth saving. it’s a war not easily won but if anything is worth winning then this is it."

Greetings from the Wolfman.

Hope you had a good breakfast today.

Are you alive and kicking dude

He's okay. He posted at about 0823 your time, giving us all hugs.

cool

I've spoken to fifasy via pm and he's doing better today

Thanks, Ferris.

How are you?

I seem okay at the moment. Thanks for asking.

I've realized, I think, that alcohol is a no go zone for me. This all came about in part because of alcohol. At the weekend I socialised while drinking and I was so hopeless even when I got on with people. I realized I just have to accept I can't socialise much like other people. Certainly not with the kind of people who go drinking anyway. It's tempting to do it because attractive women go drinking but I see now it's just an illusion that takes a lot of my money, pride and sanity away. The rejection gets me in those suicidal moods.

I feel unhappy with life to be honest, in many ways, but I think I have to try to live as some kind of hermit who pursues his passions and tries to make a contribution to some niche.

Im pretty sure I'm genetically disposed to not handle alcohol. My mother is Jewish and it's not unusual for some Jewish people to be lightweight drinkers. It hits us more for some reason. My mother said she did things totally out of character that scares her the few times she drank when she was young.

I just made a big online order of organic food and fruit juice. I'm going to try and become a specialist at something and forget about trying to be a sociable person. If I ever feel more confident I want to try joining local special interest groups too. I'm slowly refining my diet as I mentioned in other threads. This is because I have felt tired and not been able to focus on learning for doing much for years when I ate like an average diet. So I recently found out potatoes, yes the humble potato, gives me tiredness and nasty toilet problems. So I'm going to be eating mostly vegetables, beans, lentils, nuts, seeds and fruits and see how it goes.

All I can do is try and be patient and hope one day I will feel able to cope with everything.

Too long, didn't read version: I'm alright.

I'm Jewish. And I don't drink at all.

I'm glad you're doing okay.

There's nothing wrong with "being your own man," which is what you should do, instead of socializing just to be socializing.

Hey, Fifasy back in the house!

If drinking doesn't suit you then best avoided, not sure it suits many people really. Trouble is if you stay sober you then get reminded of what a bunch of ejits drunk people are!

Enjoy your nice food and take care of yourself!

Good that you are back Fifasy.

When I met my husband he was addicted to all sorts of things that are bad for you. Coincidentally, his father is Jewish. It sounds really positive that you recognise that you are not your best self on alcohol. Over time my husband has become addicted to more and more healthy things. I think it is really good to go down the route of finding other things that matter to you.

Do you eat Quinoa? I find it a good substitute for other carbs that I don't eat such as pasta. It is also really easy to cook a batch as it keeps well for the next day too. Also, depending where you live in the country Riverford are great for high quality fruit and veg.

It took me until I was about 35 to realise that I didn't need to be social for the sake of being social. It was like this eureka moment when I realised that all the enforced spending time with others was actually fairly detrimental to me. I have a very small group of people I really like spending time with, that energise me, and make me feel alive and understood but I now avoid being social with people who just make me feel drained. I feel better for it. It is nice to be able to make an active choice about how much of yourself you give away and how much you keep for yourself.