i am doing better but still not really any real improvement

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Hi nightbender. I have been hoping that things for you will be moving in a positive direction. I feel things will get better for you if you believe they can get better. And if you don't think they will get any better---I think you will find things will improve. What concerns me is your parents butting in on top of your meeting. As a parent myself, I sometimes feel like I might butt in too, but I believe from how you have described your parents, that they might butt in a little too much. Something that could work would be to compile a bunch of notes and hand them to the person in charge of a meeting---and that way, your parents could not interrupt the notes. My therapist always said he appreciated me bringing notes to therapy sessions.

You do speak and present well in my opinion---but like you imply, does that prove that you aren't damaged? No, it doesn't prove that. I do believe you have damage.

I don't think I have been able to help you in the past, but I want to continue to communicate with you because whether or not I can help, I am here as a friend. And I care about you. I want you to know that I am here to support you. If you want to unload your feelings on me (and I am sure there are others here that you know of that wouldn't mind either), you can.

thank you both

I'm so sorry I haven't written in a while. Ive been moving to a new place and I just set up my computer a few mins ago.

I'm so sorry Your going through all this night bender. You need to tell you case workers that you feel your parents are being verbally abusive and keep them on your side.

I say this because what your describing sounds like what my dad was like a when he was abusive.

I also think I remember you saying they were abusive but I wasn't 100% sure on that.


Ether way it sounds like your parents are trying to turn your case-workers against you. If this is indeed the case then take steps to prevent this from happening.

I'm so sorry your having trouble with your brain. Don't give up though! I hope things can get better!

Keep posting because we do care!

And sorry for not getting back to you. I had to move back to my parents house abruptly so thats why i did not post in your other thread.

not sure in others words i was telling them what they did to me over and over and again for months on end, they made me sound stupid because of as voice modulation problem, and i would be very upset at night because of something and i dont remeber what so i would call my mom to talk me down and she would like that, my case managers just said from now on you deal with that period well it dont work that way. recently i just lost the last bit of my authentic self and with it the ability to see things my way.

they were for the longest time

nightbender,

I am taking a break from WP and will return in a few months. While I may be able to make a couple posts to your threads during that time, I can't promise to do so. You have a very capable support team here at WP. I'm hoping Jenny will resume her conversations with you. Glider18 has also indicated he will check in on you from time to time. And just-me is obviously very concerned about you as well.

You are in my thoughts every day, and several times every day. Hang in there. I like you very much and care deeply about you. I know you will heal. Just keep the faith.


alba

Yes I thought they were.

Are your case workers taking your parents side , or yours?

I know abusers can be very good at hiding what there like.

I'm so sorry your going through all this . You seem like a very nice person. I hope your life gets better soon.

I'll post here as often as I can. you were there for me during my troubles. now I'll try to be here for you.

thanks

they dont seem to think its important what happened

they dont seem to think its important what happened

Perhaps they don't know the full story. Have you told your case workers about the abuse?

If your case workers aren't caring perhaps you could ask for new ones to better help you?

Hang in there night bender! Just don't give up!

i have, they said it happened years ago you have your own place and now and are a "adult', it doenst matter anymore

they said my very real problems dont matter just becuase they dont for some reason(im not this way for lack of trying or lack of effort.)
and these guys are the best others would be worse

OMG! THAT'S AN AWFUL THING THEY SAID TO YOU!! !
I'm really pissed off at your case workers! It takes a lot for me to get mad at people I don't even know. Your case workers should be fired!

I'm really sorry they said that to you. The one person who said that to me is no longer my friend and I hate her for saying it to me.

Sadly the person who said this to you is the person who should be helping you! I'm so sorry your in this situation night bender.

It was years ago but you cant just and be fine about it. What they did was abuse and that is a horrible thing to go through!

You probably have ptsd. When you described getting upset at night it sounded like ptsd. And you might be having flashbacks at night.

Your case managers know about the abuse and ignore it. They know you have mental health problems and ignore that to. Is there any way to get new case workers?

They are letting your family continue to bring you down and that is awful!

I hope you can . Let me know because that might help you to have people who are actually going to help.

How are you feeling right now ? Are you doing ok?

i used to have that
mental crap is the least of my worries
what im dealing with is neurochemical receptor trauma and a bothced recovery procces
crud like depresion or whatever is boring to me and easy to get rid of

i problally could get new ones
excpet the others would be even worse

i am actually supposed lose the one automatically in next several months

that kinda the problem that they think that i have "mental health problems" means that im full of it and can be pushed around

the thing that has me po is that my recovery was thrown out of wack because of my fathers laziness and stupidity
that everything would have been great had he not done that and everyone is like so what right and wrong dont matter
and that im supposed live my life now as this hollow fake disabled person

thanks

you cant do anything but listen for wich i thank you


they also said im using these things as excuses for not taking responsiblity for myself
the thing is im boned

hyperinflation is coming my ssdi/ssi wont be enough for ever
i wont be able to work anything more than a minium wage jobe and not for that long
its doubtful i will be able to learn new skills to get better employement

Hi nightbender. I have been thinking about you a lot today. I have tried several times to think of what to say...and I just don't seem to know what to say that can help you. So, I will be listening to you and offering my friendship in these posts. Your situation is extremely challenging. It's like you need a fresh start with new case workers or something. I was lucky with my therapist---and I wish you could have someone like him. He always listened to me and treated me like I was important. And he offered help skills that I was to practice between therapy sessions. I'm not seeing at the present time, but I often miss getting to talk with him. Anytime I had a problem, he treated it so humanely. I so wish you could get someone like that. He was a master social worker. Is there anyway you could find a master social worker where you live?

I want you to know that I am here to listen and talk to you because I want to. And I think it is important that you let me know what you would like to talk about. I don't care what it is---it could be hobbies, music, news, or your situation---just let me know. I will be looking forward to hearing from you. Best wishes,

glider18 (Tim)