Board index › Coping in life › The Haven

I stabbed someone, my friend said its embarrassing...

Page 2 of 2 [ 20 posts ]  Go to page Previous  1, 2

Previous topic | Next topic

Apple_in_my_Eye
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 7 May 2008
Gender: Male
Posts: 4,420
Location: in my brain

13 Aug 2009, 10:32 pm

It sounds like your friend might be worried that people -- who won't know the story -- are likely to be made really uncomfortable by the fact that you stabbed someone. They'll assume you're some touchy, psycho guy who stabs people just because you're mean. IOW, that your friend doesn't want people thinking she has a violent, mean friend.

Also admitting it freely in public -- people usually have a sense of the social shame (whether or not they share it) about such things, and tend to keep quiet about it. Loudly mentioning it gives the impression that you have no sense of right or wrong, which multiplies the impression (whether true or not) that you'll hurt people for no reason.

It's a little like saying "I killed a puppy" -- if people don't know that it ran in front of your car and you tried to swerve but couldn't not hit it anyway, then they'll assume you just grabbed one off the street and killed it on purpose for fun. It just comes off as ugly and scary.

Stabbing a guy in the shoulder seems a little 'excessive,' but not having been there I'm not going to pass judgment.



Alraune144
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker

User avatar

Joined: 23 Jul 2009
Age: 40
Gender: Male
Posts: 65

13 Aug 2009, 10:42 pm

ryan93 wrote:
Quote:
I was drunk, he got in my face, I had knife in hand, I dropped it, he went for it, i got it first and stabbed him in shoulder...


Meh, I don't really blame you, but brandishing a knife was excessive. You shouldn't really have done that when your were drunk, but I'm not going to be a condescending ass to you, you did what you did, and it's done, so me ranting about violence is pointless. In any case, while I'm not a violent person in general, if someone crossed the line and I had the legal advantage I would thrash them to pieces without sympathy.

Anyway, they are embarrased because by committing a violent crime you've just been pushed into a box with the gays, transgenders, criminals, goths (oddly), foreigners, hippies and any other minority group that people see as sub-human. By stabbing that guy you've been ostracised, and hence you've lost your benefits.

It's "embarrasing" for anyone to be seen with someone from any of these "groups", and they don't want to be guilty by association. If I was best friends with a guys for ten years, and then told him that I'm a gay, muslim, down-syndrome transman there's not a very big chance that he'd still talk to me (btw, I didn't pick that example to insinuate there is something wrong with gay, muslim, down-syndrome transmen, in fact some of my best friends are gay, muslim, down-syndrome transmen).

TBH the whole stigmatisation of felons is a little odd to me, I understand the necessity of the justice system and prisons, but it's not nessesary to look down on a criminal just because his acts are evil, or even he is an entirely evil person himself. We of all people should know that people are essentially hard-wired, and a criminal was born with criminal tendencies, just as an aspie was born different to others. Nurture helps, but at the end of the day some people just want to rob cars and stab people in the shoulder we should try understand that people aren't random, they are programmed, and their consciousness is often along for the ride. :)

I'm assuming your posting because you want to get this off your chest a little, so tell us, how did you feel after you stabbed him?

Edit: I know this is random, but nonetheless I think it's important that I say it:

ZEGH8578, you remind me of this stark-raving mad canadian I used to know. That was a compliment, you just don't know it yet :wink:



I was happy...for over a year he kept ranting about since he had been a HS wrestler he could disarm me...I said he couldn't...he was being an ass and insisting he could...i got the laugh when I not only stabbed him but I also did it s**t faced drunk and barely standing...


_________________
Verichten Von Grutton...

I've been exiled, persecuted, left alone with no defense...


Alternative
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 29 Jun 2006
Gender: Male
Posts: 6,341

14 Aug 2009, 6:20 am

You should say to your friend "Why is it embarassing to stand up to myself? Everyone's got a breaking point, and I couldn't take it anymore.."



MDD123
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 6 May 2009
Age: 41
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,007

14 Aug 2009, 6:27 am

Kind of funny that he had to wait until you were completely smashed before he could make his move. Then he goes whining to the cops when he doesn't win, that's a friggin loser right there. My ex roomate did the same thing.

I wouldn't go mentioning it to everyone you meet unless you want to give the impression that you're violent. I honestly don't know what you have to go through when you have something like that on your record.