Extreme Rages

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Your neighbors sound like professional a-holes. Not trying to be funny or anything, but hearing protectors -- like the ones used at shooting ranges or construction sites can block out an amazing amount. And with earplugs at the same time even more. Not a great long-term solution but maybe enough to save from punching someone's lights out at critical times.

I.e. cabelas

Thankyou for the suggestion, I will look into those, anything to help me, as it has left me exhausted from the anger. Normal wax earplugs just dont do enough.
I wonder how a normal person would react. Would they just be able to shrug it off?
I dont understand why it makes me so angry and distressed and irrational.
It is like the pressure builds up in my head, and I want to kill something, break something, stop it anyway it takes.
I will be trying to get out of here now, using a solicitor if I have to to get out of my 1 year contract early. I cannot remain here like this until april

I get that way, too, but have been lucky to have lived in a really quiet place for years now. I think it's the disruption of 'routine' -- the sense of safety that comes from having a predictable, familiar space. That at home in bed at night is supposed to be safe, predictable, where I can predictably sleep. And noise is so invasive and disrupting to that, as if someone came in and poured a bucket of water on my blankets. (or on me, if I'm sitting trying read in the living room or something) I think it really is an autistic thing. I think NT's would be irritated and angry, but not so invasively as to the point of meltdown.

Good luck with the lease and getting out of that hell hole.

Ive been thinking of how you can get the police to handle it.
Call up ANONYMOUSLY and tell them you think they are making drugs. tell them you smell chemicals and smoke that you think could be a meth lab.

Then when they show up for a drug bust, chances are those people probably have pot or or crack they are using. cause people like that usually use drugs.

so they will be arrested and you wont have to hear them.

I really want to help any way i can . i know what its like not to sleep and i know what its like to have noisy people living near you. so i will help you any way i can.

But i really think that suggestion will help you.

Aren't there noise ordinances? Most places it's like 10pm-7am that people can't make much noise.
If it's not actually a crime, you might be able to go to court to try to get a ruling? If they're being disruptive, sometimes you can get a peace order that will make it a crime to violate it. I know that doesn't help immediately, but might at least give you some hope that it won't continue indefinitely. Have you checked local law?

It doesnt seem to actually be considered a crime here, but people do get anti social orders for things like this. It seems the environmental health people deal with noise issues rather than the police, but it isn't a quick solution as they gather evidence over a period of time, which isn't much use to me. I am thankfullly going to my mother in London for 3 days on Monday so I can at least have a bit of respite. The hard part is getting out of here really, as when you are on government help, many people will not take you, regardless of whether you are clean living and quiet and the fact the money comes in directly to them. And I have seen the sort of person the landlords agent is moving in above me and cant imagine being able to live with that unpredictability for any length of time.

I am praying literally that they keep it down tonight because I have to get up early to go to the doctors and sort a few things out before I travel.
I cant take another night like that. I kinda feel bad for thinking like it, but I would not feel anything at all if they were murdered in their beds. I despise people who knowingly cause me distress. It is something in people I cannot understand...enjoyment of making someone else suffer. And they know they do because they have heard my shouting and crying and it just made them make more noise.

Just me, I dont think I would dare do that, I don't know they do drugs or not. One of the males is a taxi driver and the cops would walk in and wonder what I was on if I said I smelt something lol. Here in the Uk, they prefer to charge the victims these days rather than the perpetrator...lt is something of a running joke in the news at the moment. I would simply be arrested for wasting police time or somesuch, I am sure. It is the landlords agents responsibility to sort this, but he is an idiot who preys on vulnerable people in desperate need of a home, then ignores any issues they have. I would love to wring his neck personally.

> hearing protectors -- like the ones used at shooting ranges or construction sites can block out an amazing amount.

I bought a whole box of 144 of these - cut out 32 db. I can still hear stuff, but it's not as bad. Worth it. That plus a fan on for "white noise" can help. And focussed relaxation. And having friends' homes to escape to, which I do not have.

I totally understand and I get really pissed off and frustrated myself from time to time. I've been in states where I just punched the crap out of myself repeatedly because I was so upset. All it ever did was piss off my husband who said I was being ridiculous and there was no talking to me when I'm like that. As for not having friends, well I'll talk to you online if you want. I can't really do much, but I can listen and give you my two cents, which may or may not help.

What I would do if I were you is to sign up for something like kickboxing or Kung Fu, etc. I took Tang So Do for a while myself and it really helped to just be able to open up a big ole can of whoopass on a stranger in class who was wearing pads so they didn't get hurt. It kinda gets it out. Also, now that women's boxing is getting big, you could see if a boxing gym around you has any women working out there and you could start training there. It's just an idea, but sometimes beating the crap out of somebody you aren't mad at really does help, especially when it's part of exercise and nobody gets mad or hurt during the process. Of course you will have to let them beat the crap out of you too, because thats only fair, but it won't really hurt cause you'll have on all that padding and you'll be trying to learn to block.

PaganMom

I know what you're talking about. I've heard that voice for years. I've always been known for punishing myself. I used to, as a kid, put myself in the corner when I did something wrong (not only to teach myself, but also to avoid the loud noises of others yelling). Ignore it. That's all I can say. If you don't, the internal threats you make against yourself will continue, and worsen (I've given myself migraines before after punching myself in the head). I know it's hard, but I'm fighting a similar battle to you, so you're not alone.

Thanks Pagan and Meo, I am glad I am not alone in this.
I have been at my mother's for a few days which seems to calm me down, not because of her so much as being in a quieter environment. But I dread going back to the hellhole I am supposed to call home and the stress of the noise.
I think I need to find something I can acheive so I don't feel so much rage inside and maybe a higher self esteem will lessen the instinct to lash out at myself when I get angry and frustrated.

The noise level you're describing sounds like pure torture.

I have hyperacusis so I can sympathise. Had a bad incident yesterday complete with meltdown. I hope you find a new, peaceful place soon...

thankyou Zen, my main issue is motivating myself while depressed, into seeing my solicitor, sorting out paperwork, calling the relevant people. I don't know why but I find such things so difficult. It seems to take a lot of effort to do anything official like that, and then my mother gets angry because I haven't done anything but keep bringing up the issue.

I really hope things get better for you. I have heard that the police do that in the uk . i had just forgotten about that. I'm lucky that our police her in the usa still are loyal and true. i feel i can rely on them in times of trouble.

I hope that things improve. hopefully they will get evicted or will quiet down.

I'm sorry your in this situation. I hope it improves.