I have to kill myself soon.

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Just because you don't go to college doesn't mean you won't get a job as a programmer. A wise man once said something important to me: "A good computer programmer will never be out of work". He also told me that they hire based off experience, not only school. If you have time working with a language, that is what they are looking for, more than a degree. Become involved in open source projects, work on some projects, that's my primary path. I may be going to a community college, but I do open source programming on the side, so I can pull out my code and say "This is why you should hire me". Just because you get good grades in school doesn't mean they are going to hire you. It all depends on your skills, not your degrees. Degrees will help in getting you better pay, and are good to have, however internships and open source work can get your foot in the door.

Are you talking about universities that wont accept you?

Because I think you can easily get a computer programmer degree (or a similar job) by going to a vocational school. These kinds of schools say that they have requirements for accepting students but it's a real lie. Theyll take anyone who has money.

And it sounds like you really want to do this so I'm sure you can get a degree like this in two years time. Plus vocational schools will actually help you with job finding and job application skills which the universities wont do squat. Search hard for a good school and they'll take you in.

It's normal to be worried about university and exam results, but look at it this way; by planning on commiting suicide, you've already said to yourself that you've failed.

Even if your results aren't what you expected, there are loads of people who didn't do well academically, who are now widely respected; Einstein and Bill Gates to name a couple! Just because you don't do well in school, doesn't mean you aren't smart and that people don't realise that.

Whatever your results are, if you kill yourself now, they'll be forever associated with you; in the papers, the obituary, peoples' minds; they'll be the last things you ever acheived.

Whereas, if you ride this out and make the most out of your life, then whatever happens, nobody will give a damn what mark you got or which university you attended; that stuff will pale in comparison with what you can go on to do.

The only failure in life is a quitter, and your quitting would make all of us pissed.



Rubbish. Anyone who would demand that of you is hardly worth trying to impress.

You have to hang in there, it sounds like you're dealing with depression. Sometimes our mind can be stressed to the point where we want to throw it all away--life included. If you push forward, it'll pass, there are many ways for you to handle the problems you just listed in your post and still be happy and productive.

I can tell you I know exactly where you're coming from but you have to hang in there, there are ways to persevere as long as you don't give up.

Thanks, Tach. I've been thinking about getting some programming certifications, then getting an internship and working on open source projects. I'm not really feeling suicidal anymore. I just felt really awful yesterday.

And there's different ways of expressing that awfulness.

Take care mate

Keep us posted on how things are developing.

See ya sometime, somehow, somewhere?

Glad to hear you're feeling better. I think this is a good direction, but I also think you need to have Plan B... find a way to give back to the world. There's a need out there that you can fill.

Take care, and do keep us up to date on how things go.

Please don't! You are so worth living. My friend wanted to commit it, and it broke me down into tears. Please don't. . It's a terrible waste. You are always helping people being alive, even if you aren't aware of it. And if you died, people...LOTS of people, would miss you. Even if it doesn't show right now. I guarantee you, you would break your family's hearts, and anyone who heard of it would mourn for you.

Oh, I see I posted too late. . Still, read it!

There's a bridge near here that people have jumped off of to kill themselves, so they have suicide hotline phone numbers posted all up and down the bridge!

I gotta wonder if this is the best place for this discussion....

You're right.. but it popped into my head and out my fingers..

And the OP said that he was feeling a bit better today, and was just particularly upset when writing the original post.. so an interesting fact can't be that horrible a thing to add, can it?

Well, I mean, these people that have jumped off the bridges in the process of becoming "interesting facts" were once human beings. People jump 200 feet off the Aurora bridge in Seattle all the time, but they don't jump in the water usually , they aim for the pavement.

A friend of mine used to work in an office under that bridge and he came into the parking lot one day and there was a jumper smashed into the concrete from just minutes earlier. Needless to say he did not "LOL"

The OP has demonstrated that he/she seriously entertains suicidal ideation and you think that giving him information on how to more effectively kill himself is a good idea just because it's an interesting fact? I know, I know, you thought the fact was the hotline number, not that bridge jumping is a pretty effective way of dying.

I suspect if you started a thread on the most effective ways to off yourself, the moderators would shut it down post haste. Because there ARE people here that DO seriously consider that option from time to time... the OP included.

Unless you find the rising numbers of suicides in this country just another 'interesting fact'.

Please don't do it. Suicide is never the answer. Everyone's life has value and a purpose. You were born into this world for a reason. You are special and unique, and the world would be a much worse place without your presence in it. If you believe in yourself, you will succeed, one way or another.

This.

Suicide harms not only yourself, but those close to you. You, like everyone else, have a purpose in existence. This year has been hell for me, and I'm trying to discover my purpose. That's what life is: a quest to find purpose.