Yeah, I've felt that way too. Sometimes I feel like I want to have it so it can explain why I feel the way I do about the world. I do have many of the symptoms. Highly intelligent, good at math, terrible social skills, I talk to myself, inability to read social cues, and so on. I guess I also don't want it because I want some hope of actually being a normal person. I want to be like everyone else so badly that I kind of just hope it's all in my head. But then I realize that I've been like this all my freaking life and then I get depressed. I have friends, and after years of practice am able to talk to people, but what I have to say is not always what they want to hear...if you catch my drift lol