Social Exhaustion

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Not really. I am just myself and I do what I like doing and I don't really socialize. Have I found being around other people tiring? Of course. In school, I always wanted to be home and do my usual stuff and be in the basement where my personal space was. I didn't even try and fake it then and I got crap and when I would try and socialize, kids didn't seem to like it still. I stayed on topic, didn't talk about what I was into, I talked about what they were talking about and it still wasn't good enough for them.

But it's nice being with people who accept me because I can be myself such as family. And people don't push me into talking or going to social events. Maybe because I don't have any friends. There was only that one woman last summer who asked me why I wasn't talking to anyone and told me I should and if I got that often, it would irritate me too and make me not want to go to any social events like to any barbecues or family gatherings because there be someone who will do that to me. So yeah I can see why aspies wouldn't want to go to them because of that crap they get.

I still struggle with social anxiety, so pretty much all the time. The strange thing is that I don't even like being alone for too long.

I'm experiencing this today.

Yesterday I had to go to this group meeting thing to help me with confidence, interview techniques and help with CVs.
It was the first time I'd been out of my flat ALONE since moving in 6 months ago.

First challenge - finding the place. Not only was I given bad information, but when I went back to the jobcenter to ask again, no one could tell me EXACLY where it was, they could only give me a rough idea "past so-and-so resturaunt but before the library, if you hit the regersty office you've gone too far" and to that have me about 3 streets worth of searching distance so I had no idea. after about HALF AND HOUR of searching in the summer heat (I do NOT fair well in heat, specially sunlight) I had a little break down and cried for a bit. after that i started asking people... They all looked at me like I was crazy, they'd never heard of the place.

Just before I was about to give up and go home, I found it. It's was tucked away behind some building, there was NO way someone who has never been there before or didn't know the area could have found it. I only found it because there were some people outside smoking, and I thought "I'll ask them, if they don't know, I'm going home" so that was lucky.

Then it was the whole social situation. There was about 8 of us and the speaker woman. That wasn't too bad.
I put on my little "confident, friendly, outspoken and probably a little annoying" act and I was answering questions and getting involved with the conversations. I was proud of myself, I was usually the one to break awkward silences and start conversations with people and I knew most about what to do on your CV and all that jazz.

Then I carried some shopping home. Sensory issues cause issues with my eating, which in turn cause problems with my health, so that was very hard for me. I actually have bruises on my arm from the heavy bag.

When I got home, I just wanted to sleep. My eyes hurt and I was so tired and achey and I'm still feeling like that today. I don't know if I'll be as chirpy today.
I just hope I don't make a fool of myself (more than I probably already have) from lack of focus.

hey friend, ya it happen some times but I think we should remember it as a joke of our past life.. In future, remember and laugh..