Suicide
I really appreciate the comments and time you have taken to listen to me and respond thoughtfully, thanks guys. Reading all the replies, I think that my main problem is trying to rationalise my existence in a word that for an athiest has no purpose. There is no God for me, so life is all I really have. And yes, instead of lying down and complaining about all the things that bother me, I should really be defining it and bringing it some meaning (temporary at least) by trying to improve it, if not for me, then for those around me who I may or may not care about.
Certainly the world will not become perfect in myt lifetime, but I can at least work towards that positive change instead of wasting that potential by complaining or dying. Instead of giving up, I say those who are aware of the negative impact they are having have a responsibility (such as myself). And since I don't like people all too much, helping them out and assisting the planet will bring me a greater feeling of satisfaction and hopefully make me begin to like myself again - after all, in the end all we have is ourselves, so we might as well enjoy it. Anyway, thanks again guys, I'm feeling much better, but I need to do alot more thinking.
Also of possible interest is an old email I sent an old member of the forums named ladakh, who was going to commit suicide also (themachine1 I know you were in contact with him, what eventuated out of it all?). I discovered it this morning and read over it. Sometimes the best words of advice can come from yourself. Take a read of it, it may help some of you out or give you a different perspective:
I just read your post about ending your life.
I'm sure you've had people left and right giving you the usual tired cliches: 'I don't know you but I care', 'please don't, we can talk it out', 'things will sort themselves out'. But we both know that sometimes this isn't the case. But at least it is hope, and we both know that without hope we can't function. We also need a purpose. A true belief in God provides both. So for me, and many others who don't believe in God, we need something else to keep us going. Maybe it's stupidity? What rational being would continue to live and struggle when he believes it is ultimately pointless and his existence is meaningless? - I have no doubt that I will be completely forgotten in 200 years, like I never existed. But for some reason this doesn't bother me, because I know that this finite purposelessness is all I've got. It's all you've got too.
So, in all of my short life's wisdom I offer you this; certainly not hope, but perhaps a different angle. At the very least I tried for you: You only get one shot at life. One genuine, official try. Everybody agrees that if we life a mortal life then we die a mortal life, so why cut it short? Live it out and let it be. I am certain it's absolute crap. It's unfair, it's biased, and to me it's purposeless, but the fact that there is only one per person makes it somewhat of a collectors item. I say live through it, don't die in it - in the end it's all you've got.
Whether or not this makes any difference to you isn't important I suppose, but I would at least like to hear back from you - sooner rather than later. Also, thankyou again for your words about God and the afterlife you sent me - a stranger taking the time meant alot.
TheMachine1
Veteran

Joined: 11 Jun 2006
Gender: Male
Posts: 8,011
Location: 9099 will be my last post...what the hell 9011 will be.
No I never heard from ladakh again.
Yeah I usually daydream if I had the money what I could do to change the world. So
I do little till I get the money and do little to get the money. At 36 I feel I'm much closer to the end than the begining and I acepted what I will likely do in life. The simple
things keep me going. Like my 3 and 4 year old nephews are like sponges I am teaching
them chemistry and all knowledge in general. They will be very advance students and
they are for more likely to change the world than me
I don't like it when people say suicide isn't a choice because it is. People unfortunately choose suicide far too often before genuinely exploring other solutions. Yet there are things that are truly worse than death.
In regards to ruining the planet: Fossil fuels are the second most common liquid on Earth with water being the most common. We have been told for decades that we are about out of fossil fuels, yet they still keep coming. Eventually, yes, we will run out, but we might complain for several more decades that we will be running out soon before we actually run out. Technology is a powerful force and we will come up with something to help take the place of fossil fuels. I'm not sure how we would change our infrastructure and transportation methods to accomodate the new lifestyle.
My point is much of what we read and watch on TV is negative and grossly sensationalized, but society thrives on it and we keep feeding it. It is hard for a lot of people to deal with that crap, but know that it likely contains a kernal of truth, but is likely not the whole truth.
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