20 Jul 2012, 11:54 pm
Toy_Soldier wrote:
Well Ladybugs, we got two new birds today. A pair of little blue finches. It is nice to have little chirps going on in the backround again. I know people are not finches, but it did make me think that at least in some cases the best way to deal with a hole in your life is to fill it with something new... or at least do some active trying out of new things.
Very good - and beautiful - advice.
You are a sweetheart, that's for sure.
I'm so glad that you've got two new birds. I think blue finches are absolutely darling! ((hugs))
21 Jul 2012, 11:35 am
I am not sure this is applicable either, but it was a new discovery for us...
We found that stumbling unexpectedly upon any reminder of our old bird brought on a strong wave of saddness. So I have been trying to find and remove all those things. But I also printed out a large picture of our old bird and placed in on the wall right next to where we keep the birds. But being so obvious it somehow doesn't trigger the same response, like we get to know its there and it is familiar. You want to remember the good parts and let the bad parts fade I guess.
21 Jul 2012, 1:38 pm
HUGS
21 Jul 2012, 4:49 pm
Toy_Soldier wrote:
:oops:
I am not sure this is applicable either, but it was a new discovery for us...
We found that stumbling unexpectedly upon any reminder of our old bird brought on a strong wave of saddness. So I have been trying to find and remove all those things. But I also printed out a large picture of our old bird and placed in on the wall right next to where we keep the birds. But being so obvious it somehow doesn't trigger the same response, like we get to know its there and it is familiar. You want to remember the good parts and let the bad parts fade I guess.
I am not sure this is applicable either, but it was a new discovery for us...
We found that stumbling unexpectedly upon any reminder of our old bird brought on a strong wave of saddness. So I have been trying to find and remove all those things. But I also printed out a large picture of our old bird and placed in on the wall right next to where we keep the birds. But being so obvious it somehow doesn't trigger the same response, like we get to know its there and it is familiar. You want to remember the good parts and let the bad parts fade I guess.
You can talk about your birds all you want to.
I think it's applicable, because you've used your birds to give me some good advice and made me think about some things. I appreciate that very much.I have decided to just not worry about my friend, and her attitude. I'm not going to check for messages from her or anything. I'm letting it go - I did everything I could to appease her, so now she can decide when she wants to stop acting this way and apologize.
Curiotical wrote:
:cry: HUGS
Thank you!
22 Jul 2012, 9:52 am
LadybugS wrote:
I have decided to just not worry about my friend, and her attitude. I'm not going to check for messages from her or anything. I'm letting it go - I did everything I could to appease her, so now she can decide when she wants to stop acting this way and apologize.
I think that's a wise course to take Ladybugs. I had an extremely brillant but difficult (angry ranting) co-worker/friend once, and had to establish that I did require a certain level of respect and would not tolerate a lot of Crap. The problem was partially due to his being so brillant/needed at work that the supervisors and other workers tended to appease (and also avoid) him. The thing was I had to make it clear-cut that if they did not stop the rantings directed at me, our friendship was done and I would try to work in another area. I wasn't mean about it, just very matter-of-fact. In a way I left it up to them, but if they couldn't manage a civil friendship I also made it very clear I wasn't going to entertain a unhealthy or painful one and was certainly moving on.
I too have gotten some good things out of talking, Btw.
22 Jul 2012, 10:01 pm
Toy_Soldier wrote:
I think that's a wise course to take Ladybugs. I had an extremely brillant but difficult (angry ranting) co-worker/friend once, and had to establish that I did require a certain level of respect and would not tolerate a lot of Crap. The problem was partially due to his being so brillant/needed at work that the supervisors and other workers tended to appease (and also avoid) him. The thing was I had to make it clear-cut that if they did not stop the rantings directed at me, our friendship was done and I would try to work in another area. I wasn't mean about it, just very matter-of-fact. In a way I left it up to them, but if they couldn't manage a civil friendship I also made it very clear I wasn't going to entertain a unhealthy or painful one and was certainly moving on.
I too have gotten some good things out of talking, Btw.
I too have gotten some good things out of talking, Btw.
Good for you, for standing up for yourself! I need to do that more often!
