Google seems to confirm that I will remain alone

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Anyone who types in that exact search criteria might feel as if they found a soulmate. I wouldn't despair.

I need to kill myself. Soon I won't even be able to eat, as the EU plans to let loose GMO crops in the EU, by making it illegal for each member country to have their own laws regarding it. Honestly.... why hope for anything....? I should just get really, really drunk.... and cut my throat. My mother already knows that I want to die, since years back, so I have prepared her for it. She believes in the afterlife, too, so she should be fine, afterwards, with time.... I'd visit her as a ghost, afterwards, too, to make her feel better, anyway.

Finding my true love would make it bearable to live in this horrendous world, but I think most in this thread agree that it is unlikely that I will.... right...?

Nothing is fun, anymore. I tried to play some new videogames, this evening, but I just couldn't..... it just wasn't interesting. I have no interest in anime, anymore, either. All I have interest in is to die.

Have you tried joining a paraphilias forum? There's a paraphilias sub-forum in the sexual disorders section on psychforums. Maybe you could find someone there who's interested in having the same type of sexual relationship as you.

I found several who agree with me, over the years.... well, since 2008, more like it, really, when I started trying to find "her". But they all lost interest, over time, or were unfaithful. The latest one was the worst, to be honest.... she was so very much like the girl of my dreams.... but yeah, it ended, anyway, for reasons I am not even sure of. It crushed the last shards of my spirit, to be honest. I no longer love her, but I have become nothing but an empty shell, now.... a walking corpse, actually, pretty much. Without hope, what remains of a person....? Nothing but an empty shell..... nothing but a walking corpse of a person. I can't see myself putting that trust into a person, yet again.... so why should I then keep living....? To wait for the day when I can eat nothing more than exceptionally unhealthy, patented GMO food, due to the cross-pollination that has taken place...? No thanks. :/ Or maybe, additionally, the day when the FRA and other institutions monitor absolutely everything I do online....


Question: How painful would it be to die by bleeding to death by cutting one's throat? Would the body numb it out with its own drugs...? I wonder how it would feel.... dying by cutting my throat has always seemed appealing, to me....

Question 2: Is it really without pain to drown? I have read that it is, all too many times. I mean, many must have survived, who can tell of it. If I drugged myself and drowned myself, that might be a rather painless solution.... maybe even pleasant...?