You're a f**k up and your going to suffer in old age

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I have to say I find this mentality more harmful than helpful...the OP did not say they will kill people or list any plans. They said the thought is in their head....is it better people let these things fester inside rather than trying to get some outside input to convince them otherwise....if one can get in 'serious trouble' just for telling how they are feeling...that is an issue, but I did not see any actual threat in the OPs post....it is threats that are a problem, not being honest about being so fed up you're having such despicable thoughts.

We're in the exact same position, same age and predicament, l except I have no desire to take others out with me and I have a job. I don't support suicide, not yet, probably wont until I actually try, but it is not a cowardly act. Most don't quite get the pain a suicidal person is enduring until death enters their life. I suggest looking for work, I really do. There are jobs out there that failing ASD people can survive in, I suggest looking for a university job like I'm doing, especially at the more behind the scenes jobs like maintenance and such. If there isn't any real meaning in your life yet then at least have funds for the small things that you get enjoyment from. 30 is a long ways off, might as well partially enjoy the decade and you never know what might change in 10 years and if you still feel the same way the final out is always still there. I also have the same plan of ending it at 30 or so if nothing real has happened. Hang in there

if it were me i would try lotrimin or nizoral. no prescription needed. have you seen a doc? that might be a good first step.

With all due respect, if this is how you approach life seek help immediately. That's completely sick. If you want to end your life that's great, but don't take anyone else with you, is that how you want to be remembered?

Well.. why? Are you waiting for someone to come along and tell you how to live your life? It doesn't work that way and it never has. I get how hard it is to get along when you're depressed but someone isn't going to come along and make you follow your workout routine or finish school. It's up to you and you alone to get out there and better yourself.


I disagree. Being occupied is a great distraction from depression. You could also make new friends and learn more social skills. You also mentioned being unemployed and lacking money is a big factor in feeling the way you do.


What did they do to you to make you feel the way you do? They're doing the best they can I'm sure. It's no easy task raising an autistic child. It's neither their fault or your own.

Honestly dude, you sound angry and entitled, you take a victim mentality and blame everyone else for your problems. I mean I understand first hand how hard, incredibly hard life is with high functioning autism, especially out of high school with no direction on where to go.. but if you take this approach to life it's only going to continue to get a LOT worse.

@wurmh0le: I'm interpreting your lack of response to my question as ether a resounding "F**k Off" or that the authorities have nabbed you for making death threats. I hope that it's the latter condition.

If you really literally mean what you've posted, you need to get help immediately. ER, hotline, whatever, but do NOT go through this on your own. What's at stake is the future of your universe.

19, 20, I remember that age. I was lucky to be in a very good place, but it was still terrible sometimes. I'm 52 now. I have a good life. Lots of things I probably should have done differently, but anybody who doesn't think that at my age probably isn't thinking at all. You likely won't believe me (I wouldn't have, at 20) but it gets better if you let it, particularly if you will take a serious look at yourself and be willing to work for yourself. For me at least, not exiting this life was a very selfish thing--how else would I get to see what happens next? Hint, whatever you think your life will be like in 5 years, you are wrong. Aren't you curious? The worst thing that can possibly happen to you is absolutely nothing, and once you're dead that's what you get, forever. So why rush to that when it's guaranteed to be waiting for you in 50, 60, even 80 years?

Your life isn't about what your parents want. It's not about what the people around you want. It's not about what society wants. It's about what you want and what logic and the laws of the universe allow. If you want to be fit, eat right and exercise (don't worry about getting old, that takes care of itself). If you have an infection, get it treated and stop doing whatever likely caused it. If you don't want to pay taxes, plan to live without a lot of cashflow--learn a trade that's useful in a small town and live simply. Society, your parents, individuals who are close to you really matter only in how they can help or hinder your goals. BTW, it might not seem like it right now, but some of those people actually want you to be happy even if they don't know how to help with that. Take responsibility for your future, and start by going to get whatever help you need RIGHT NOW.

I don't know why I neglected to say this but "taking out others with you" was a deeply disturbing thing to say. Disarm yourself if it's that bad and those are serious thoughts you are having, GET HELP.

Risky thing yo say on he internet, Dude. They're may be some dark-suited people paying you a visit.


School is not for everyone. Spend your days working on yourself. Find out what you enjoy. There's no rush. Like you say, we're all heading to the same depressing ending.


Do you have a diagnosis? You may be entitled to disability benefits. That's how I survive as I can no longer live with my parents.


Forget about why got you to where you are. It's done with. Take what you have and work with it. Past wrongs may have to be left unrighted. Personally, I figure karma takes care of this stuff anyway.