14 Aug 2016, 5:57 am
14 Aug 2016, 6:46 am
14 Aug 2016, 7:09 am
Barchan wrote:
So just the other day, at mosque, the imam and a group of guys approached me and basically told me to stop hanging out with my best friend, because she "leads a sinful lifestyle" (she is trans and pagan). They said a bunch of nasty things about her which I don't care to repeat, and naturally, I got pretty defensive, and told them that she is my friend and how dare they talk about her like that? I told the imam that I expect an apology, and I'm not coming back to mosque until I get one. 
I'd rather be seen as a bad Muslim than a bad friend.
I've had struggles with faith before, but this is the first time my religion has been actively hostile to somebody I care about. Everything they said, of course, was islamically correct. And this has made me realize that, even though I identify as Muslim, I don't seem to have much in common with any of the Muslims I know, and in fact I have very few Muslim friends. The values I hold to heart are secular and western, and I could probably just abandon Islam and not much about me would change. But if I abandon my religion, I feel like I would be betraying my family. My parents would be crushed if they knew I felt this way, but the truth is I'm only doing it for them.
I'd rather be seen as a bad Muslim than a bad friend.I've had struggles with faith before, but this is the first time my religion has been actively hostile to somebody I care about. Everything they said, of course, was islamically correct. And this has made me realize that, even though I identify as Muslim, I don't seem to have much in common with any of the Muslims I know, and in fact I have very few Muslim friends. The values I hold to heart are secular and western, and I could probably just abandon Islam and not much about me would change. But if I abandon my religion, I feel like I would be betraying my family. My parents would be crushed if they knew I felt this way, but the truth is I'm only doing it for them.
Hi, as a Muslim I can understand what you mean. In Islam we are supposed to treat others with kindness...etc. There is a huge difference in seeing something someone is doing and believing it is a sin and treating others harshly. Even at that, people are supposed to look at themselves 1st before judging others. You said you really do not have any good Islamic teachers or resources so I will name just a few.
Some good Muslim American speakers that you can find on youtube, are; Yasmin Mogahed, Nouman Ali Khan, Omar Suliman, and Abdul nasir jangda.
14 Aug 2016, 7:44 am
14 Aug 2016, 6:23 pm
Barchan wrote:
DataB4 wrote:
What will happen if you stick to your principles and either find a new mosque or not go back?
Nothing, probably. Except I'll have lost a sense of community that has comforted me in the past. It's hard being shunned by your peers in religion, I think Fnord can sympathize with me on that one.Then I wait for the inevitable "I told you so" moment, and remind them of how they've been neglecting their duties. That's usually the last day that I attend or visit that particular religious institution.
For example, we're about to lose our Youth Director at church. His assistant has already declared that he doesn't want the job either, and will likely leave, as well. Several of the adult "youths" are able and willing to follow the Director, too. I've hinted to some of the leaders that there will soon be another "mass exodus" from the church, and they just laugh me off and say that I'm "crying 'wolf'".
Yet, every time that I've "cried 'wolf'" in the past, the "wolf" that I've "cried" about has inevitably shown up.
Maybe I should just wear a sign that says "I Told You So!"
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