(TW) Just a question (TW)

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Music, cats, volunteering (I'm a steam loco fireman / stoker), a variety of bargain bin cars, my home (which is a boat), humour, nice food and drink, continually learning and staying curious, retaining a good sense of the absurd.

This year has not been a good year. But the older I've got, the more experience I've had of getting myself through and out of bad times. So I worry about them less than I used to.

I live because I see beauty even in the Mundane. In the street signs on the road.

What’s making you sad, High Vamp?

I was in a sort of despair when I was your age, too.

Isaac Newton figured it out before anyone else. He wouldn’t have done it had he “put himself down.”

You never know what life you can live. Something even mildly good could happen tomorrow.

I stay alive for my K9 kids.
I am not going to leave them behind, by themselves.

Before I go, I'd also like to see the mainstream world accept, and acknowledge, the existence of gang-stalking and hypnotic abuse.
I am doing something where I can.
Not wanting the bastards to win also gives me a reason to stick around.

You have people/pets in your life that you care about, and who care about you.
You don't want to hurt them, right?

Existentialists define their own meaning/purpose in life.
I am part existentialist, part nihilist, and part stoic.
May I suggest you empower yourself by defining your own raison d'être?

To avoid derailing this thread, I've replied here.

I remember my teen years well. They were nightmarish. I think this age of life, in America at least, as tortuous, especially for aspies.

For me, getting away from my father was a huge relief. I spent several years in hell, and it took a full year of effort to get away.

You take one more step and one more breath because you can.

I am also in Florida. Please feel free to PM me. Part of my work is connecting people to resources. You might be surprised.

One time I got accused of "lacking empathy" here because I was against someone wanting to commit suicide because they were depressed and in an abusive environment. I begged her not to, but still sympathised with what she was going through. But then people in the thread started attacking me saying that I should let someone commit suicide if they want to and that it's not fair to stay alive just to make loved ones happy and all of that. But suicide is illegal in many countries and if I'd said "ok, go ahead, since you're suffering emotionally, don't worry about your family" and that person actually did commit suicide the next day then the law could accuse me if encouraging another person to die.

I wish I could find this thread (not to bump, just to read again) but with the crappy search function here you're likely to never see a thread you want again.

What would have happened if Abraham Lincoln was allowed to commit suicide in the 1840s? He was seriously contemplating suicide then.

The point is: Abraham Lincoln didn’t think of his future self while he was severely depressed.

I missed a dose of something. Today is going to be hell. It sucks being in physical and emotional pain you have to control of. Feeling you are going to pass out any second. Throwing up when your awake and when sleeping, woken up with the urge to throw up. Feeling your body shaking from not having it in you system. Not sure if you should take it now and then later. Just increasing it yourself. waning off of it. I don't know. All I know is I need a distraction. Currently home alone.

Last edited by HighVamp913 on 16 Nov 2020, 11:07 am, edited 1 time in total.

Yes two people. They are the reason i made it so far

What is the medication you missed taking?

Did you know you can call any pharmacy and ask about what to do with any medication if you miss a dose?

An anti-depressant I have been on for years. And another thing that is supposed to stop urges.If I call will they talk to my parents. I don't want them worrying. My dad doesn't need that on his plate. My mom...doesn't either.

Hey Lots of people responded to your question already but I didn't see what I thought was the actual answer and I thought it might help with figuring stuff out, so I'm answering too.

We do mostly treat dogs and humans the same. Using your comparison, if you were a dog the vet would send you home with some medicine and tell your owners to look after you

We only put down dogs to end their suffering when a medical professional says there's slim or no chance they'll ever have a reasonable quality of life.

(We also put them down when it costs too much to treat them but that's not really relevant)

For the bit that's different, we're getting closer to allowing people to end their own lives, but also only when a medical professional says there's slim or no chance they'll ever have a reasonable quality of life, just like with dogs.

And that's for our own protection, because we have this whole mechanism that means when things are really difficult we convince ourselves they're even worse and won't ever get better or we won't be able to cope. It's impressive but really f*****g complicated (oops, can I swear here? guess I'll find out when I hit send) how we do it and hide it from ourselves but I'll happily try explain if you want.

So the real answer to your question is that medical evidence says you're probably going to get better, so we won't put you down, sorry

That also happens to be my answer to why I carry on, not because "don't worry, things will get better x" but because they might, so it's s**t and unfair and impossible and I constantly want to cry but carrying on is the only way I might get to any of the things I want

What is causing the urge to throw up?

Pepe, it is the combination of the two not being in my system. I took something else to help me sleep. And another for impulse control. The sleeping aid helped but now that I'm awake tempted to take another. Taking the ones I missed earlier... Scratch that tried it came up. If I take another dose of both of them, there is a chance of ODing. Now I'm just sitting here thinking. Knowing I might get another chance, at making. Sorry text-to-speech. Thought I was talking to myself. All I'm saying is . I don't even know what I am saying.

Better not to double up on meds, etc, unless a doctor says it is OK.
Next time you see him/her, ask if it is OK to do so.

I guess you just have to be awake for a while until the sleeping cycle comes back into sync.
I have read that the sleeping cycle is about 90 minutes.
Maybe, after that time, you can try and sleep again, if you don't have anything specific to do.