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LabPet
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18 Dec 2007, 3:00 am

Graelwyn - Please remember that you did NOT deserve for this to happen to you. I have been betrayed/violated too (different circumstances, same version)....I know the desperation. I still feel the pain but it does become less acute with time, I promise. Someone once told me, "Be nice to yourself, do something good for yourself for once." I think this might be good advice! And, you cannot change your feelings. If you love him still, then you do.

Can you try to do something, anything constructive, to distract yourself (within the limits of reality)? I cannot imagine how sick/hurt you must feel....I am so sorry.

I know! I'll send you an imaginary virtual bouquet of Alaskan wildflowers in your favorite color, ok? True, the snowfall has covered the ground deeply here, but we can pretend. Do you like forget-me-nots (periwinkle), twin flowers (white), fireweed (magenta colored stalks), lupins (deep violet), and dogwood (dainty yelllow flowers)? Why don't you send yourself some flowers? Try not to be sad for the holiday. You do matter to us, if that counts.

duncansbass said for you to rest - that always does help. Hot tea?


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The ones who say “You can’t” and “You won’t” are probably the ones scared that you will. - Unknown


Danielismyname
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18 Dec 2007, 5:48 am

It's not easy for people with Asperger's to form relationships; who we are here, what we can do here is sometimes a far cry from who we really are and what we really can do.

I don't really like giving advice on things so personal, but I will say this: tell the person you bumped into everything, the good and the bad; there's no point in hiding from the bad, hiding from it with lies, and subsequently causing pain in the future.



Graelwyn
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18 Dec 2007, 2:56 pm

removed



Last edited by Graelwyn on 19 Dec 2007, 1:24 am, edited 3 times in total.

Danielismyname
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19 Dec 2007, 1:11 am

Asperger's/autism don't prevent someone from lying.

We like the factual truth, seek it out no matter how blunt we become if it's something we're interested in; people will still lie for their own benefit/gain, no matter the disorder one is afflicted with.

It's personality.



Graelwyn
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19 Dec 2007, 1:23 am

We have somehow managed to work through this to a point where we are not just running away in opposite directions.
I know the reasoning now, and am able to forgive, call me a fool if you will.
I no longer believe the intent was bad, although the impact was and the lying was.
I have a tendency to wish to try and forgive and find resolution and so we are staying in contact for now. I simply have grown too attached and to feel too much to have the usual reaction one would have to this.
We all make mistakes, some larger than others.
I shall see how we go.