domestic abuse , from my family

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I only had one job it was at a clothing store called Ross. I did quite well there , it was really my family that caused me to quit . I was chosen out of about 300 applicants. I know this because my boss took me in her office and showed me 2 stacks of papers and said "I chose you out of all these people because you seemed the most determined ". I couldn't handle the job, partly because I was forced to use a cash register and I was afraid of messing it up. I am very bad with maths and I struggled a lot. I did very well socially. Except when I had to formally complain about another employee who didn't seem to want to help me learn the register .

I worked there for just under 2 weeks, because I was so afraid of being fired and I kept having to clean my family's entire house and work this job simultaneously .

I really don't know if I can work I'm so scared of it. If I did I would have to be living somewhere else before I could handle the stresses. (Its the chicken before the egg situation . )

I have no signs of having aspergers any more because I cured my self . I believed I could, so I did. I can get along with anyone , I am very popular member in my church. I don't have very many friends but that is my choice. I don't want to conform to there views ( after a while I get sick of talking about cloths and hair) I like to talk about politics ,science, psychology, philosophy and new age stuff. No one my age wants to talk about that. I'm just to intelligent for them .I have talked about these things and even 50 year olds start staring at me blankly after awhile . When I'm at church and people hear me talking I notice the table goes silent. Every one listens to me, as if what I'm saying is very important. They have toled me I am at there level of intelligence but sometimes I suspect surpass even them. If I wanted to have a lot of friends I could but I don't see the point in that. If I do find someone my age that is a compatible friend I would befriend them but thus far I have seen none , there out there but there far and few between .

I am interested in showing my true self . In this society its impossible be your self you will be pushed down because people are envious of you .
When I was diagnosed with aspergers the person writing the report said I was a genius . My test scores were low in the easy levels but very high in the difficult levels . He said I seemed bored by the simple tasks and jumped ahead to the difficult ones. He said if I had the patience to do the tests properly I would have scored off the charts. He also wrote in the report that because he had to average the test scores , my results were a huge underestimate of my true ability's.

Many will tell you that operating a cash register is not the best job for someone with AS. Might I suggest some clothing warehouse work? You don't operate cash registers, you work with order sheets and put together orders, or you might get a job where your role is to tag clothes. Mundane work, but sometimes, that mundane work is the stuff that sets your pace well. While you earn your money you can go back to school.

Don't worry girl, I used to be in the same boat just as frustrated with the workplace. And I never have been diagnosed with AS, I just have some of the traits like you do.

Xelebes please don't take offense when I say this but why do you think the statements I am saying are an exaggeration. I assure you if anything these statements are understated to say the least. I still don't remember most of my childhood. I appreciate the help your trying to give , and don't want you to stop helping me because of this statement. But I want you to realize the things I have been though. So many people have toled me not to exaggerate my claims, simply because what I have been through seems so horrible it cant possibly be true. I myself find what I have been through a living hell. But It makes it worse if the people who are trying to help don't even believe you. Please try and keep your mind open to the possibility that my situation and many more peoples situations are this bad or worse . It would help me if anyone in the state of Florida knows of any government assistance for someone in my situation.

Thanks.

The worst part is my mother is on oxygen from smoking. I don't know why my father is saying these things.

Xelebes I am usually a very positive person to the point of being too positive . Its just that I've been remembering the things in the past , things that have been repressed until now. I have been crying a lot. And this place (no pun intended ) seems to be a safe haven for me. I get where your coming from and I value you advice greatly, but when ever I'm not at home I'm a totally different person. I'm allowed to be happy without fear of being screamed at for it. I have surprised many people by my optimism. Many people at my church (my parents don't go to my church) are surprised I'm related to my family in any way. I have had someone come up to me and say "why do you hang out that that girl ?" I responded "thats my sister." " thats your sister!" They said in an offended voice (raised eye brows and all.) Then quickly tried to say sorry as if they had offended me . I politely toled the person that it was ok because I didn't like her very much.

(((Xelebes wrote )
( I was only going by her first post. I had no previous information to draw from to form any conclusions. I was opnly left to make a suggestion and possibly encourage to impart more details so that I could either empathise with her.)))

I understood that I wasn't offended .

ebec11 I love your avitar ! lol I know that was random.

I'm just so sick of living with my family. One day I'll be out of this hell hole , I don't know how i just will be.

Just give your sis a foot massage, and ask her to be nicer to you and agree to be more tolerant of her activities.

A Woman's shelter could help. Sometimes we took in women from 100 miles away. Usually abused by husbands but can also be family members. Safe houses are normally kept a secret so the abuser can not find them. They then try to get you help with living on your own.

people often occasionally swear at each other it depends on how often it happens weather it is abuse or not. If it is only occasionaly ignore it as this is part of interaction people often say s**t if they are angry. If it is more often stand up for yourself and say don't talk to me like that or tell a counsellor.

If you're 21, you are quite able to move out on your own.

I would suggest finding some way - any way (legal) - to do so. No one is forcing you to stay there.