Dear "You"...From "Me"-Letters Unsent

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Dear old friend,

I miss you. I wish I'd been able to know you in real life. You were there for me in so many crucial moments. At least once you turned to me for help, but looking back I feel like I failed.
Not that it mattered. You're strong. I only wish I could have been to you what you were to me.

Dear Tommy,

You were my first AS friend, and I have known you for about 5 years, I didn't like you at first because of your violent behavior, but you changed eventually and we enjoyed telling each other our life-experiences, just slacking on saturday-nights and talking like 40-50 year old women over the phone when we got a new game, I find it sad that you didn't want to not go to my school when you graduate from secondary, we would have such a good time, from me.

Dear Haakon,

You were my newest AS friend, and a person i looked up to last year, sadly, you work this year, and will probably never come back, we spent late nights challenging the world online on several videogames, I challenged you a few times, but you always won when we played your games, as I beated you when we played mine, I don't know how I would manage the s*** that has been bestowed upon me if you wouldn't help me out, from me.

Dear Jordan,

I wish I never met you, because you have changed my life forever. No longer can I go to sleep at night without seeing your beautiful face and wishing that I had you to hold me as I go to sleep. I can't help but believe that we could have a wonderful life together but I know that it could never be. 1) You are off in college and are busy getting an accounting degree and being a sweetheard helping your family. 2.) You work very hard at your job and have several long days. 3.) Even if we did get together (which is a billion and one chance) I know I would never become the woman you deserve because you are truly the most hardworking, outgoing, gentle person I've met. It sounds so stupid since I know so little about you but I know that you were meant to be in my life because I remember the first time I saw you perfectly. My heart felt something that brief second it never felt before. But did I imagine this? I don't know. The only thing I do know is that I want you, but I will never have you. I hope you find a woman who deserves you and will love you with all of her heart. Because that is what you need in life.

From- TNS

Dear Insane Downstairs Neighbor,
STOP HARRASSING ME. You have no life, and must be living with your ear to the ceiling if the small noises I make going about my life bother you THAT much. I don't even wear shoes walking around in my apartment, and I'm pretty much always there alone these day, now that my boyfriend is studying in California. Sure I play my i-tunes, but I keep the volume pretty low, and that's up on a table. I know that I'm not that loud when I'm chatting with my boyfriend on Sykpe, or doing the Spanish speaking exercises on my Rosetta Stome Program -- certainly no louder than the normal conversation you'd get in any apartment. Sure the swivel chair I sit in when I'm at my computer squeaks when I move, but I don't move that much, and the squeak isn't loud enough to be disticlty heard in your apartment, unless you're listening for it. I TOLD YOU in that note I wrote you a couple of months ago not to bang on your ceiling, or ring my doorbell, and that you REALLY shouldn't ring my doorbell at a quater to 1 in the morning when all I'm doin is sitting at my computer typing, then when I don't answer, yell through my door, "You just keep on making noises. I'll be here all night." That is WAY over the line. I told you that that you should take any complaints about me straight to management. That does not make it even remotely acceptable to yell up to me from your apartment at 7:30 on a Sunday morning. I was SLEEPING, you lunatic, and I REALLY didn't need to be awakened by your delusional diatribe, telling me that if I'm not going to go to sleep, I should get up, or just go out. I WAS sleeping, you madwoman, until you started yelling at your ceiliing. You must have had me mixed up with the voices in your head.. Seriously, lady, get yourself some help, because you desperately need it. Is it supposed to be a threat, yelling to me that if you complained about me to management, I'd get kicked out? I'm going to get kicked out because ONE crazy lady complains about me? Yeah, okay. Seriously, take your greivances to management, and leave me in peace, like I very diplomaticaly requested in the letter I wrote to you a couple of months ago. I seriously don't know what you're talking about when you say, "If you're not going to go to sleep, just go out." Is that in reference top the fact that, on weekends, I'm often up on my computer until 1 AM, and that my TV or i-Tunes are often on, then. The volume is perfectly reasonable, and I'm much happier at home, than forcing myself to go out just for the sake of it. If you're so irriated by the noise, YOU go out. Oh, and real original, asking me through you're ceiling, "What's wrong with you, anyway? Are you normal?" Like bullies haven't been asking me a thousand variations of that exact question for YEARS. Thank you so much for reminding me of all those years of bullying. No, I'm not normal, but that's really not your business. Especially since you're the one yelling at her CEILING at 7:30 on a Sunday morning, you're really not the authority on that matter. By the way, it's REALLY creepy that you know the hours I keep. What's wrong with YOU? Are you a stalker? Seriously, go check yourself into the mental hospital, where you so desperately need to be, and GET THE HELL OUT OF MY LIFE.
No Love,
CR

Dear Dad,

Thank you for not being there when I needed you most, for walking out at a critical time for childhood development.
Thank you very much for wasting the few precious hours we had together each week by turning up completly pissed as a newt.
Thank you very much for all the times you endangered my brother and mine's lives by drink-driving.
Thank you very much for sowing the seeds of seperation anxiety into my head during those lost years you were never there.
Thank you very much for breeding the crushing insecurity, abandonment issues and neediness in me due to your absence in my life.
Thank you for being the worst father ever.

Because by being the worst father ever, you drive me to become a better person.
Your neglect drives me to overcome the horror and the pain of a broken childhood and to rise above it all.
The greatest revenge I can inflict on you is to become a better person and to let your abuse slide off me like water off a duck's back.
You may have broken my heart but I refuse to let it destroy me.

So thank you. Thank you for all the pain, the hardship and the angst.
I will overcome.

-Sarah

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Dear Ex-Boyfriend,

I refuse to be friends with a drug-taking, hard-drinking slacker such as yourself.
Though we had much fun, I cannot be with someone who was constantly bringing me down. I deserve better than what you gave me. I am a kind, honest, loving and generous person. I deserve to be respected and treated as an equal but all you've done (consciously or not) is made me feel underappreciated, cheap and worthless.
I refuse to 'mother' you and be the one to pick up the pieces. You are perfectly capable of making your own decesions and choices in life without me. Yes, I know you need help with certain things but I can't be your carer.
I tried to make things work with you but if I'm the only one putting any effort into the relationship, then it's is inevitable that it will not work.
It takes two to tango but you have two left feet.
I don't want to dance with you anymore.
I don't want to cry or loose any more sleep over you.
I deserve more than this.

-Sarah-

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Dear Susan Jeffers,

Your self-help books have been a constant source of enlightenment for me.
They provide with answers and sound advice and I'd just like to say thank you for writing those words of kindness and profound wisdom. Thank you.

-Sarah
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(hugs Shastania)

Dear Mayor Narvaiz,

As a resident of San Marcos and an urban planning major, I am concerned with the state of transportation in this town. The roads are very poorly planned, and the configuration of the railroad tracks in San Marcos leads to constant gridlock, especially during the day, and especially along Hopkins St. near City Hall and HEB. If you would consider my idea for an elevated sidewalk system for the city, that would be a great asset.

Thanks,

Tim Boyd

To S.D.,

Do you have an inkling of what you have done or is your denial absolute?

You will face justice and, eventually, yourself.

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Dear A

I still think about you, wonder what you are doing and miss you. Wonder what might have been, how it became such a nightmare, why you never did try and contact me first after it ended.

It makes me sad, but I am too wilful to initiate contact again, and be the one to crawl.


Dear humanity.

I loathe you.

Dear My Job,

I hate you.

Sincerly, TNS

Dear You, I'd wished I'd never lost contact with you and more than likely had been a burden unto you for not trying harder at the friendship and all yet, I hope that you know I really did care...


Sincerely,
ProfessorX

Dear Alan “Howlin Laud” Hope,
I think what you're doing is great. I would join your party, if I didn't expect repercussions to my future career and my life being assaulted through social networking sites if I did.
Maybe some day, I'll be in the party.
Asmodeus

Dear Son,
I love you.
I always have and I always will. It's because I love you that it hurts so much to see you suffer. To watch you struggle, to feel your pain and to know I am the cause because I was the one who gave you AS.
There are no words to express how badly I feel about passing this on to you. I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy and yet I have hurt you.
I understand your anger. You never asked to be different. You just are and yet the world will not accept that. The world likes uniformity and it fears those who challenge their sameness. You are unique and wonderful. A brillant and beautiful mind. They attack you to make themselves feel better. That's all. They want to prove to themselves that they are superior to you and if they have to lower themselves to name calling and bullying then that's what they will do. I know, I suffered it too.
And yet I cannot stand by and let them do this to you. I had to tell the school and now you feel I have interferred. A charge I admit to being guilty of because I am a Mother and you are my Son. It's my job. I am taking you to the Psychologist for the same reason. It's not that I feel you are wrong and need fixing. I just desperately hope she can help you see that you are wonderful just the way are.
I did what I felt I had to do and I still believe it was the right thing to do. I hope you will one day realise I did it because I love you not because I was trying to make your life harder.
Over the last few months you have been drifting away. I can feel myself losing you. I miss you. Please don't be angry at me for wanting you back.
I will wait for you. No matter how long you need, I will wait. I will be here. You can rage at me all you want because I know you need to rage at someone. You need to show your anger and pain and I am here to witness it. To validate it. Away from the world. Away from the people who would seize on it and use it to hurt you even more. You are safe with me.
Take care my Son and know that I love you. I always have and I always will.

To the drummer in the band at the soup kitchen where I volunteer. You were very nasty to me, today. You know that I'm obsessed with music, and you got really angry for the time that I was playing your drums. When your brake came, I asked if I could play on your drums, nicely, and you handed me the sticks and told me to bang on that little black table, so that I wouldn't have to worry about playing them nicely. You thought you had me under your thumb. I played on your drums very nicely after that. I'm not going to allow myself to be treated like crap.

What will you say to yourself, when you come back in two weeks, to find that I'm not sitting in the music room, beside you?

"I've scared off a sensitive autistic girl, who thinks that she's Mick Avory."

Say that ten times and see if you feel better, or worse.

Dear Some of my Classmates,

You suck. You make me glad that I don't understand what people do most of the time. You make me happy to be the person I am. You make me happy that I speak my mind and that I speak the truth. I am happy that I do not play the games you play. Sometimes I want to know what you are saying, but you can be such horrible human beings that I feel better off not knowing. And you must be horrible if I've figured it out! You are cowards, close-minded and cruel. You have done things that make me very angry. If I find out what you have said and which of you have said things, you will not like what will happen to you. You are supposed to be studying to be in a helping profession. You want to help people who are "different", but you can't handle the ones right in front of your face. And you don't have the guts to tell the people you don't like-- you tattle, like second graders. Kids used to call me a tattle because I always told the truth. I did. I spoke up when things weren't fair. And things aren't fair now. There are a lot of things I don't know, but I know what fair is. You're not it. If you can't handle people who aren't like you now, get the heck out of your major right now. Go be a... I don't know, but go do it away from me. I have always thought of myself as being emotionally crippled. My whole life. But you know what? Somehow, I've got this one right. Someday, I will be your boss. And someday, good will win. And you will lose.

Laney
P.S.: And your little dog, too!


Dear Moron Who Tried to Rape Me,

You do not register as a human being. You took advantage of me. I told you I could not handle being touched. You said you would help me. You tried to rape me. If I ever see you again, I will hit you as many times as I can. I will break my hands hitting you. I will kick you in the crotch. Metaphorically speaking, you do not have balls. Literally, you do. And I will kick them. Repeatedly. I will make it so you cannot do what you did to me ever again, not even all alone in your bedroom with your magazines. I was too afraid to turn you in. I thought I did something wrong. But it was you. You were wrong. I did not know any better. I was your victim. But if I ever see you again, I will change that.

Laney


Dear God,

Thank you for making me exactly who I am. You have told me that I am to be in the world, but not of it-- and you made me so I have to be that way. You ask for the faith of a little child, and you have given me the ability to take you simply on your word and not try to make it fit what I want it to say. You ask me to pick up my cross every day and follow you. You have given me a cross to bear, but you show me where to walk. Thank you for making me the kind of person who cannot hurt another for the fun of it. Thank you for allowing me to exist outside of social convention. Thank you for being real and concrete to me, so I can understand you. Thank you for writing down what you want so I can hold it in my hand. People aren't so good at doing that. Thank you for always listening to me and understanding me, even when I don't understand me-- which is most of the time. Thank you for making me the way I am for a reason, even I don't know what that reason is. Thank you for your sense of humor, even though I feel like the punchline sometimes. Thank you for letting me talk to you. Now I don't have to talk only to myself all the time. Thank you for other people in the world who are like me. Sometimes I get very angry at you and yell at you. I tell you that you were wrong to have made me in the first place and to stop wasting your time with me, because I'm not worth anything. There is nothing special that I can do. I am tired of being bullied and want to go home. I am a mess of a person, in public and in private. But for some reason I'm still thankful. I know that you made me who I am, and I know that you are a God who saves. And you know that I needed saved.

Laney

Dear popular kids from high school,

Go screw yourselves, I didn't appreciate having to sit through that slide show watching only the popular kids for an hour, and watching certain people celebrating their scholarships for 2 hours, just in order to graduate high school. Just because you people think you are so special doesn't mean you have to bore the hell out of the rest of us and force us to clap for your pathetic asses for 2 to 3 hours just to get our god damn diplomas.

Screw you,
Tach


Dear humanity,

go screw yourselves, all you ever do is screw everything up, odds are the world would be a lot better off with people who knew what the hell they were doing and weren't corrupt.

Screw you,
Tach

Dear you... "I try to be patient, but you're killing me"