Rants

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I wish I were beautiful or smart or whatever to compensatefor everything I lack.

And as that's not possible I wish I didn't have anything to hold onto, that I might be free to take 96 percocet with a bottle of wine.

Oh sweet fantasies

GRRRRAAAAHHH!! !

The @#$^$% ex-wife has gone against our standing court order for a lousy 2-hour visit per week and is now preventing me from seeing them at all.

Again.

I'm so mad I could smash things!!

Sometimes I think the more I understand about the way society works, I grow to dislike it more. So many mindless drones out there doing what they are expected/told to do. They need not worry about what to do next, just copy the friend next to you and carry on. Individuality is a rare quality in this world of ours.

I have ants in my pants and it makes me rant!

My mom is making me save up for a laptop that I really don't need because I have no interest in Neopets right now. Bull f*****g s**t.

I'm into console games now. I'm not a little f*****g girl who plays Neopets. Well, I enjoy Neopets. I just have no time for it.

Besides, it's my money. I should be able to have control over it.

I repeat bull f*****g s**t.

i think this is one of those days where i just feel lonely. actually it's been a few days. since the mid semester break started on friday. the guy i hang out with in my education class told me he was so excited to go home and be with his friends and do things with them and i'm not going to be there and he is not my friend. but i want him to be. so badly. i really like him. this holiday i won't be doing anything with anyone. not the next holiday either. and not with him, definitely.

aaaaargh so sick of being intolerant to something in the food I eat, causing bloating and reflux and worst of all giving me an insatiable craving to binge eat all the worst kinds of food! ARGH!

Generic "Don't have the confidence to talk to her" sort of feeling.

If only the need for the helicopters was gone, but it won't be for days and days most likely. And now they've set off a sensitivity to all sounds even the dishwasher is bothering.

I can't stand people who wear "five fingers" shoes when they have absolutely no intention of running. I mean, the barefoot running movement is dubious enough, but to see your ordinary pedestrian wearing a suit and the f#$&ing Five Fingers...what business do they have wearing them!? Hey, good for you, you can spend over 90 bucks on toe-shoes that would make you scream if I slammed my heel on your foot--you must be well-off and oh-so-trendy you fashionable hipster-you! But I can't ask you to walk any faster down that sidewalk much less run in those abominations, because that would make you sweat and you might even scuff those frickin' ugly things!! Ugghh!

helicopters helicopters helicopters helicopters

Why do I push people away without being conscious of it?

I am too much like a hedgehog.

I am so strange.

I can be rational. I can see things objectively. But it's hard not to be reactive when I'm ticked off. I am not a chess piece.

I feel like I'm going to kill myself any time now.

I would love to have supernatural powers, which I would use to destroy all the people who have ever laughed at me and made me feel bad about myself. All those people who have made me have a bad attitude about myself will be sorry, and I would love to of cursed them at the time.

The girl at school who used to call me weird, make up BS stories about me to everyone else and got them to believe her, and hung around with friends in front of me to make me feel more lonely than what I could have been - at the time I wished I made a light above her fall down on her and make her head bleed in front of everyone. f*****g b***h could deserve it.

The girls who bullied me when I was 19, I would love to of brought them bad luck at the time, by making a gang come along and beat them up.

The woman who reported my bus-driver was a b***h too, so I would of made the bus run over her.

And all the girls who have ever pointed me out and laughed at me in public without me doing anything to be laughed at or even noticed, I would use my supernatural powers to make something happen to them that would make everyone else point and laugh at them, like making their trousers fall down, also their underwear. Or I'll use my supernatural powers to make them wet themselves, or want to go wee, so they'll go to the toilet and I will make the door swing open so everyone can see them sitting on the toilet. Or I'll make even worse things happen to them to make them feel humiliated in public. That's for humiliating me.

And whoever be's horrible to the people who are nice to me, the horrible ones will pay for it too. My supernatural powers won't just be to save me, I will use them to save all the lovely people who are nice to me too, who have never humiliated me or mocked me (my family and friends). I will only use my supernatural powers on nasty people who deserve to be punished.

I seriously wish to be kinda loved on these forums and IRL.......... I feel kinda sad ATM.