Why couldn't I have been born a boy?

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Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Yeah it's cliche but it's also true. I've never been a raving beauty either, so I know where you're coming from. I was the Ugly Duckling, the Beast, the Monster, the Shipwreck, etc. Guys often insulted me while they praised the looks of other girls around me. Words & insults hurt, there's no doubt about it. Make a list of things you like about yourself, along with a list of what you don't. You can't change everything at once, but over time, I'll bet you have a list of things you like about yourself that's larger than the one you don't. Give it a shot.

What I meant by my statement above, is just make the best of it. I've known some people who weren't attractive, but their personality made them quite magnetic. It can be done. But you do have to at least try.

You can't be a doctor if you're a woman? Who sez?

~Kate

Sorry, I didn't realize u had such problems. I was trying to tell a lame sexist joke to lighten the mood, guess I could have picked a better sexist joke. Are you sure it's not medication related(if u don't wanna change topic ignore that question)

Also, when u age a bit, so does men and with age and "wisdom" comes wanting to settle down with a PERSON instead of being the youthful idiot who just wants to nail some hot girl who's name he barely cares about.
*hugs*

I am trying. I'm just having a rough day, that's all. I was feeling really good about myself for the past few weeks and then it all came crashing down today. I'll be fine tomorrow, probably, but I guess I need to vent, that's all. Can't talk to my mom about it because she'll tell me to "shut up and stop being so damn emotional!" I can't cry without her yelling at me either. >.<

It probably is medication related. But I can't get to a gynecologist as they're all so far away and I can't tell my mom about it because she'll assume I've become a slut and throw me out of the house.

Why do you think I've been trying to go after older men (4-7 years older usually)? Guys my age suck. They're shallow, immature and just not what I'm looking for. D:

Even Kutztown is better than were my hometown is. I feel like I'd do better in the city...so long as my apartment doesn't have rats or bugs. >.<

*backs up* I feel like I have to march now. I don't know why.

lol that the feminist in me that came out to play Its good that your laughing about it, life with throw crap at us everywhere we go its just the case getting rid of that crap as believing in the crap olny puts us down & stops us from achieving what we really want in life.

If you what to march be my guest, can I join you on the march then?

I wish I was a guy so my body will match my brain. Hang in there. Things might seem hard now, but they will get easier. I felt the same way when I was your age. Now, i've learned to cherish and accept all things about myself. Even my size, which I didn't always accept.

Ok, let me say this. Erisad, I find you incredibly attractive. Physically at least. I am male. I tease you sometimes because what I really want to do is take you and show you how a REAL man gets it done.

But seriously, what men DON'T find attractive is the poor-me whining you do. I don't think it's your fault-there's something wrong in your brain, I know because I had the same problem, and I have to take Risperdal for it. Like you, I was convinced that all medication was evil and that other people were to blame for all my problems. I finally found myself in a situation where there was nobody to blame except myself. That's when I sought help.

You will not seek help until you realize that "men" or your mom are not to blame for Erisad's attitude, lack of success, or even lack of an orgasm. You and you alone have to take responsibility for your life. I keep telling you this, but you refuse to listen. You will need to find yourself in a situation where you will be forced to take responsibility. Nobody can make that happen except you.

You need to step outside of your comfort zone and find yourself in a position where only Erisad is to blame for Erisad's issues. There are three pages in this thread, and EVERY SINGLE piece of advice you have been given has been met by you with "the Wall of Whine". You need to break down the brick wall in your brain and seize the day. Only YOU can do it. We can't do it for you.

/rant off

So...I'm not allowed to get pissed off every now and again? I've been doing a lot better lately. I haven't made a haven post in several weeks, if not longer. I just needed to rant and get all this s**t off of my chest, mmkay? I don't need anymore medication. That's only going to make me feel worse. I never blamed men or anyone for my lack of orgasm, okay? Just my medication. I've tried working towards it and I haven't gotten anywhere. I'm allowed to be frustrated. I've been busting my ass to better myself. I'm 32 pounds lighter than I was last August and wearing smaller pants. I'm taking driving lessons and applying for jobs so it's not like I'm doing nothing and whining about how nothing's getting better. I'm taking action and just had a moment of weakness, that's all. Thank you for your help, really but I will be okay.

P.s. I laughed and joked with cdfox's advice, okay? So I didn't whine at him.

i think that's quite a rude response to pezars advice

What? He's always telling me that I need more medication and I'm trying to break away from that mindset. I didn't think I was being rude. I was explaining that I'll be fine. I said thank you too so I'm really confused as to where I was rude in my post. I'm sorry if it came off that way. D:

It wasn't rude. I thought it was a little rude to come into the haven and start telling someone she's whining but JMO. I thought the haven was FOR being able to say stuff like that WITHOUT being accused of "whining".

~Kate

A man's life isn't a picnic either, there are things, hidden difficulties in the male life that you wouldn't know about because you never thought about them.

No, your life wouldn't be easier as a male.

I was overmedicated too as a kid. I'm several inches shorter than I should be because of Ritalin. I had a string of idiot shrinks whose answer to my problems was to increase the medication. Finally, at 14, I said no more, and was that way for six years. It wasn't until later that I realized that some things DO get better with medication. You need a good psychiatrist, not one that is some medical school reject who can't get hired in Philly so he works in the sticks. I suspect that a general practitioner is giving you ADHD and depression meds, which is about the worst situation that it's possible to be in. GP's usually don't understand mental health, they are there to hand out pills. I sympathize but you really need to get treated by a qualified psychiatrist. All doctors aren't bad, the ones who work in the sticks are because they can't get hired in the cities because they're incompetent. There are actually good doctors out there. Please, get qualified help. You will always be depressed and angry unless/until you get help.