Tips on reaching the proper mood for suicide?

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Well, I don't mean the term 'self-centered' to be derisive, although it does sound that way sometimes given the way it's usually used. I also don't mean it to be synonymous with 'self-serving'. I just mean self-centered in the sense that either they can't see beyond their perspective (in the case of delusion), or the individual's needs, for whatever reason, outweigh the emotional toll that their death would take on the others involved.

Alright, that makes sense......I mean one could say its self centered based on the idea its to end the pain. After all the person who's suicidal is focused on their pain and ending it. So in that sense I can see what you mean.

This is ridiculous. You sound like you'e saying depressed people are delusion. Like they're incapable of seeing another persons point of view. In my experience when I thought people would be better off without it me it seemed as though everyone wanted me to leave and I was just making them unhappy. If they could handle a suicide there would be no problem, but you people seem to get all messed up when something goes so 'wrong'. You know what? I don't give a f**k. You people have caused so much pain in that moment that I would willingly destroy my own body. And then you guilt me back to the side of the living. f**k you! Bellend.

That was to no one in particular of course, just a little outburst of emotion. It annoys me that people can say that you have to keep on going, no matter what. What the f**k would you know? You're not that person.

Hey, hold those horses. Nobody said that exact sentiment, I'm sorry it came off that way. This isn't a subject I'm unfamiliar with, by a long shot (though I only have my own experience to relate).

If you were talking about my first 1-2 sentences I actually meant to change that before I posted :/ oh well, too late now and I forgot what I was going to say instead.

"If you're considering killing yourself, that means you've got nothing to lose. I'd spend the next year doing whatever the f**k I wanted!, then seeing how I felt afterwards."

I can't be bothered quoting properly. Anyway, I feel this idea is very wrong. My therapist also tried to use this BS on me. In fact she says it every time I see her ... "you haven't got anything to lose now". Things can always get worse. Especially when you try to push the boundaries in order to get a better position. You don't want to start feeling even more worthless than you already do.

Have you ever been in this kind of situation yourself, or just observed it in another?

Myself. More often than I'd like to admit. That's just one of the only tricks I've been able to consistently use on myself..."Hey, if I don't really have death to fear, I might as well see about trying some of that stuff I've been afraid to for whatever reason." It usually at least distracts me, sometimes motivates me to do something.

Fair enough. Going out and just doing stuff puts a spotlight on all the things I hate about myself. I wouldn't be able to just go and do it at that stage.

Yeah, I've done some low things in my time and I'm trying to learn from them. Saving a human life from a horrible fate shouldn't have anything to do with whether someone likes anime or not.

I can understand how you feel. I constantly want to commit suicide. But you probably have more to offer. I think you should try and get a decent anti-depressant.

OP: Don't know. I think we people have latent biological safeguards against suicide - that anxiety over death is rather normal and I don't think it subsides the closer you get to actually doing the deed. In fact, I think it gets worse.

There have been many times in my life where I've stood at the edge and considered letting go, and for all the suicidal ideation that bounces about in my addled mind, I just look down, sigh, and go back to my futile life until wolves eat me or something inexplicable like that steals the power away from me. I don't think I can imagine a scenario where I'd be able to do it myself. I've slept in my car for months in the mountains because I'm too stubborn to ask for help - strangely, that was a better period in my life than what I'm living now. That stubbornness is a curse at times.

Things do get better, though. Circumstances change. Hopefully the next year will prove better for you than the last. Everyone needs a reprieve sometimes.

An honest answer - its not a mood. You'd need to be completely dispassionate about it, for a very long time, know exactly what you want, and know that it is exactly what you want, to be able to go about something like that peacefully or with internal acceptance. I entertained similar thoughts around the beginning of last year when I had a very thick wall of "My life is over" hitting me.

That said, taking that route just as likely leads you to peace with what life's actually giving you, getting behind reality more, and if you're going that route, its often just better to try and find a disposition that allows you to cope with whatever ends up happening. My own understanding of self: I'll be me, in the negative senses, no matter what I achieve in learning, in business/career success, or even in athletics; the worst of me, the things that I know have put up a permanent wall between me and what I wanted is there for good - nothing will ever change that. If you find yourself looking at living with your parents till 50, being the cat lady, whatever the situation may be you need to remind yourself as clearly as possible that this world isn't one of choice, when you look around you you're also surrounded by a majority of, to greater or lesser senses, wrecked out NT's who you'd never in your life want to trade places with either. When you can understand that its just not a particularly good, pretty, or happy existance to be alive and sentient in this universe or at least the way life works on our planet - you at least get a much firmer sense that you're suffering isn't as rare and you may get less of a sense that you're getting shafted specifically that much harder than other people around you. I'm sure you can think of at least a half dozen or a dozen things right off the top that other people have been put through, similarly - by luck of the dice - that you haven't. Its kind of the same thing in that sense.

It seems like in our 20's and 30's we have a huge load on our shoulders and its the problem of trying to clean up all the fictions that society feeds us, as they relate to us, and do everything we can not to self-destruct under the weight of such unrealistic expectations.

Sorry for that comment... just felt like countering your kind words, before, by being a bit mean back (after all this time), just like I, at the same time, was mean towards a friend (but then apologized). Pushing away people, and bringing up things of that sort, is a very common thing to do when you aren't doing well. I've regretted saying that, afterwards, and wanted to let you know that. Also, I'm sorry to hear that you're so depressed, so often. :/

Anyway, I should be getting a fun package from Japan, this week. Maybe it'll make me a bit happier. I also wanted to reply to a few other things said, in this thread... won't do it now, though. I don't quite feel like killing myself, next year, right now, however... for some days, now, I've been feeling indifferent about it.

I disagree somewhat. You need to be able to get the process going. It seems like sort of an adrenaline rush. For example, I know I can be dead within 2 minutes. I've thought through it. It requires an impulse to get it started and keep it going.
The steps are:
1) Send a text to my sister to come get my dogs and avoid the garage.
2) Unlock gun safe.
3) pick a gun, insert a magazine (toss up between .223 and 12 ga)
4) aim at head and pull trigger

However, to execute this properly, I'd need to get the motivation to text my sister and then go through with it quickly before anyone could intervene.

Believes everyone has the right over there own body, as such also about their life.

So do what u want too. But please do it good, waking up paralyzed or something is worse.

And dont screw others by it (not in public, no trains etc)

I guess, but why should ethics matter at that point... do what you feel is right for you. It's your death.

This is why I think most people who've ever considered it give up on the idea. Its incredibly difficult to go there and incredibly difficult to get past your own body and mind's self-protection mechanisms.

Live my life that seems to work great for reaching the proper mood.