We're all going to die

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I was almost a stillbirth because I was strangling myself with the umblical cord, they had to do an emergency c-section. I wasn't born prematurely really though like it would have happened that day but they had to speed it up a little when that happened. Just a good thing my mom felt there was something wrong and called the doctors in. But so I guess one could say I came kicking and screaming into the world...but I guess I was pretty quiet, I cried a little so they knew I was alive but yeah idk I guess I seemed more calm when they gave me back to my mom, wheras most babies would have still been screaming and crying.

But I am glad I made it, I exist so why shouldn't I want to continue existing...that said I would respect if my mom had gotten an abortion and I never came to exist...but since I do exist, now I am a person with thoughts and feelings.

“This is the way the world shall end.
Not with a bang, but a whimper.”

—T. S. Eliot, The Hollow Men

I’ve had a death wish, not only for myself, but for the entire world for quite a while. My kidneys are failing, no thanks to diabetes (and me not being able (or willing))to control it. I’m a recluse, not necessarily by choice, since my own family and most of my so-called friends abandoned me (in addition to all the bullying over the past 55 years) for being autistic and mentally ill. VLAD (the Impaler) Putin can nuke the entire world, for all I care.

I was suicidal for a decade many years ago, for good reason.
Not a skerrick of this since.
We will exit this mortal coil naturally soon enough.
I see no need to help the process along in most situations.

Evolution has created a very strong survival instinct.
Such is life.

The world needs more viagra.



Life can be sh***y with diarrhea sauce.
I should know.
But you seem to have been hit harder than most.

hey I heard all the war stories from my mother and First World war from me nan


...

gas masks, rations...prisoner of wars

my mum married one

not my dad, he was British and definitely autistic, classical autistic, not quiet Asperger's

my mum was nt

I'm the hybrid

she married a German on the back of the second world war

go mum

Jo don't panic

and stop being down on being autistic

I think it makes you interesting

I like autistic people, they seem smart and funny...

individual

yes ok it makes socialising hard, but...nts have some really weird ideas, as lovely as they can sometimes be

Walter was the German she married

my dad was an ex national hunt jockey, one of the First 4o be helped by the injured jockies fund when they were set up in the 60s

Google Adrian ambrose major if interested

I'm the Cheryl his only daughter

I miss horses, cant afford to ride right now :sad face:

see autistic peeps can do stuff

unfortunately he had a riding accident that left him with severe brain damage

but please don't underestimate autistic peeps

they are human too

its the way the worlds set up and the way nts think that limits autistic people

I've read your posts, you are NOT stupid, your English is lovely, you often have interesting things to say..

stop being down on yourself

same applies to all the auties here

i worry about it too

its like the world cant seem to live in peace without a pandemic of some sort

get covid 19 out of the way,on to the next scare now

when does it end

It's funny I was in a zoom meeting with malaysia today and they got hit with an earth tremor. The zoom cameras were shaking and a few said they actually thought they were going to die.

(Let's get the thread back on topic - I know the few posts above are on topic)

Yes I suppose you could look at it like that. I need to learn not to believe everything I hear. But I'm a sort of echo chamber myself, I only base my knowledge of facts on what I hear from other people (NTs). I don't google anything any more because the internet is full of fake BS, and I can't always handle watching the news without throwing myself into a panic attack.

Like Caz72 said, it seems there always has to be something to worry about in the world. First covid, now war.

For me I live in Australia which is far away from Ukraine.

I am more worried about China rubbing their hands at the prospect of doing the same to Taiwan which is closer to our shores.

I hope they don't start testing these government alerts on our mobile devices, as I'm going to be so frightened. It's an invasion of my privacy. Just leave us alone, I don't want to keep being reminded of WW3. Why does the government and the media love scaring us? We've had 2 years of fear instilled into us, couldn't Putin put this off for another few years so that we can live in peace for a while between covid and WW3?

It's going to bring those nightmares back again where I'm waiting and waiting for an announced nuclear bomb to come and knock me into death but it takes ages to happen. The only way I want to die is to die peacefully in my sleep as an old lady, not by nuclear disaster. Can't someone shoot the bastard Putin? Or shove him into a Brazen Bull and burn him alive while his screams sound like a happy bull? There's loads of ways to torture him until he yells "OK, OK, I won't let the world end!"

Maybe I should just commit suicide now, before it all happens. I hate life. I hate living. I'm merely existing on this planet anyway, watching my best friend go out drinking and getting other best friends and having a brat with her drug-addict partner. God I hate the kid already and it ain't even produced yet.