F*ck This Sh!t!! !

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I wasn't talking to you.

No,I don't hate Helen Keller. I think she was a very brave soul.

However,what YOU'VE got to understand,is that living with blindness,oncoming deafness,AND an autism spectrum disorder and a severe mood disorder...well...let
s just say that is bad. HORRIBLE,in fact.

Do you realize how TERRIFYING this all is? It would be scary for anyone. Blindness is the most feared handicap in the world. I've already lost around 55%-63% of my eyesight. By this December I will be totally blind. Sure,I've got something on my computer now that reads everything to me. I am somewhat good at typing. But,add deafness along with blindness. I have not lost even 1% of my hearing yet. In fact,they don't know how much hearing I will lose(I will say that it doesn't look as bad as my brother's). But,still,my communication will be very limited. After I lose so much of my hearing,I will have to get a special computer that will "spell" things into my hand.

Now,add an autism disorder and bipolar disorder,type 1. I have panic attacks. My mood swings can get so bad that it interfers with my grip on reality. We all know how much AS/HFA people have to work to get good at socializing and all the other things that comes so naturally with NTs. We all know that alot of aspie/auties have panic attacks. Well,just think! I can't see. I won't be able to hear. If I'm not very good at socializing or expressing myself,and there's the fact that I am having a dual-sensory disability(deaf-blind).

And the big one: My "mother". She is now screaming at me and my brother everyday and calling us "freaks" and saying that we are "ret*d". She even said the other day that she wasn't going to get my brother the communication devices that he needed. She also said that she loved our two little "normal" sisters more than she loved us. Don't you think that having a madwoman--who gave birth to you--going around calling you "handicapped" in front of her friends can do great damage to a terrified,angry,depressed person who is losing two of their most important decisions?

The reason why your comment was so rude was because it made you sound like a insensitive jerk who doesn't give a d@mn what I'm going through. I'm scared. I'm angry. I'm depressed.

You can think what you want. I don't care if you hate my guts and want me die. But you will NOT sit there and make fun of my disabilities,especially since I'm still going through the fact that I'm losing it.

My final words are these: Either give encouragement or shut the hell up and stay away from my threads.


-SpaceCase

I am really disturbed by your mother Spacecase. I hope at least you get on well with your brothers and sisters.

Good to hear you have computer adaptations too so that you have our support, wonderful aren't they.

SpaceCase,
am know of a good forum that might help-
http://ouchoutofhours.8.forumer.com/viewforum.php?f=24
that is just the VI users board have linked to [the rest of the forum is great to,it's a general disabilities forum],might find some of the topics help.
am know at least one of the users there has a brother with the same condition as her to [and am think they're both losing their hearing].

Who here has an email address called ashleedolan@gmail.com ?

Whoever this is has been sending me emails,calling me an attention whore and even said that I better not get on WP anymore!

I'd like the mods to look into this.


-SpaceCase

Well, that's not very polite! I don't think you're an attention whore at all. I think you're something special and we wish you the best! Besides, my email address matches my screenname, but with an extra 7.

Oh,it's just some jack ass who got banned from here a while back. She says she still lurks. Can you say GROW UP AND GET A DAMN LIFE???


-SpaceCase

Oh...well...sorry about that. Have you responded to her emails?

After you displaying this sort of hostility and aggression over a joke you know was unintentionally offensive, I'm supposed to show encouragement?

I understand you're scared, disturbed, and a lot of other things; but chill out a little.

- D

Oh,that I KNEW,JUST KNEW was unintentional? It seemed pretty real to me.


-SpaceCase

SpaceCase, I hope you are not offended by this, but from everything I have read about your mother, from her hacking into your account and faking the suicide attempt, to saying stuff like that she sounds like a real twat.

Will your seeing and hearing issues prevent you from moving out? I hope not, because I think it would be for the best if you could safely get out of there.

I'm truly sorry that you have to deal with this AND a lack of support, by the sound of it. I don't have words to make anything better, though I wish I did. I have partial hearing loss from an accident I was in, and I also have Meniere's disease which can cause progressive deafness, so I can relate on some level. I try not to think about what could be, and just deal with what is. I can't change it, so I must accept. Families aren't always the best place to find support (my mother was great for making things worse), but know that there are people out there who get it and care.

Dracula, please apologise to SpaceCase. Jokes about Helen Keller are in bad taste. And besides, SpaceCase is going blind and deaf at a much later stage than Keller. Please apologise.

Dear Quatermass, thanks for the intervention...
I think we can get insensitive to others sometimes...I don't blame Dracula, but it's just that some situations are not fit for jokes at all... I think if we try to imagine what it would be like to loose sight and hearing, we would be able to at least PARTIALLY understand what SpaceCase might be going through....

I know, it's just so easy to be insensitive to other's feelings...but we try...and continuous trying will make a difference...

Dear SpaceCase, I'm very sorry to hear this...
I'm hoping that there would be some measures that you can take to slow down the process or even prevent it...
Maybe exercising your eyes and strengthening your eye muscles would help a little?
Nutrition might make a lot of difference...eating a lot of carrots might help...I heard Vitamin A is supposed to be good for your eyes...

Maybe you could also prepare so that even if you loose your sight and hearing you would be able to have a comfortable life?
Like, learning to use computers and phones designed for visually challenged people....
Also, getting involved with communities that support visually challenged people or hearing-impaired people might help...
They might have more useful information...One such organization I heard of is called Lighthouse International.

I'm very sorry, and I hope there are some ways to reverse the process or make the situation better..

Have you heard about "Guiding Eyes For The Blind" in New York?

They take deaf-blind students.


-SpaceCase

Hi SpaceCase - I hadn't read about the school you mentioned, but there are many excellent colleges for those who are blind/deaf! I think you've got the right idea - you're really smart. That, coupled with your insight, makes you a perfect candidate for such a college. Can you apply for this fall? I am so sorry your mother has mistreated you. FYI: I do not have parents; after my father died I was alone. I do know very acutely what being mistreated feels like. I am still so sensitive, but strong in ways too. I think you are too. I cannot imagine what your future will be, by losing 2 senses, but college/education is the key! You have so much tenacity and strength. I really admire you for that. I've read what you've written. Not once do you 'feel sorry for yourself,' or 'give up.' You're amazing. I wish more would tell you this. I know how sick/hurt I feel when all I get is unwarranted criticism, like your mother is doing. Forget her. You can do better - and you already have.

Well, if you need a college reference, you have a whole planet to back you up!