Can they have a trial behind your back

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the stress has been great but I am not falling apart anymore. I feel that whatever is happening has stopped for now. I dont know what Is going to happen. I cant trust anything.

I love your new avatar Darrell. I have two babies that look just like that!

Im sorry- not everyone can handle Blythe! haahhaha

Im feeling a bit better today. everything has been working out and nothing bad has been happening for a while now. I hope that doesnt change. I still worry that somthing is going to happen but I feel safer today. I just dont get why they havent come for me. i just dont get it. I hope they are showing me mercy.

It's good that you are feeling better.

There you are! I had lost track of you, but was still thinking of you. If I sound scatterbrained, it's because I'm moving.

I'm glad to read that you feel better. I'm sorry to sound like a broken record, but it sounds like you are taking your meds, both, as prescribed. y/n? That,s what keeps the police etc. away - you don't believe me, I think. But you know they're not coming, and that's a start.

Sorry if I seemed to disappear on you. Oh, I was several days without a computer - finally I bought this one, seems to work well. It's "refurbished."

Please tell me how things are going with you, I've read the messages but how are you today?

I used to get that - sorta like something's gonna happen? I'm trying to think of a remedy for it but nothing to comes to mind right now. That apprehension, it has made some of the most popular books and movies - well, Hitchcock, for example. Something bad is gonna happen. He could make an entire theatre-full of cheerful people suddenly become apprehensive. It's great as a brief entertainment but not as a way of life.

Look, I'm going to take a chance here, please don't be annoyed with me - do you believe in God? Did you ever at any time in your life believe in God?

Because here is my truth: you can hand it over to God, and God will take it and keep it and you can rest. And I know that to be true because I've done it more than once.

The Bible is full of people who asked God, "What will I do? What will I say?" and God's answer is usually something like "Don't worry, I will give you what you need." Give your apprehension over to God. In my experience, He will take it and carry it for you.

I remember at one point I was terrified of relaxation. How's that for a problem lol? I was doing yoga alone in my apartment, and I got to a very relaxing part, and I was soooo relaxed. And then I leapt to my feet thinking, "I'm going to lose my job!" I think what happened was that I had let my defenses down, then suddenly realized I was defenseless (relaxed) and had a panic attack. The answer to that was to relax half-way.

Tell me how you're going along in your day; hope it's better.