Purchase, you are not alone. There are many, many people who are struggling to make sense out of a world which seems to make no sense, and to empathize with people who seem to show no empathy. It is terrifying to be in that dark, lonely place that the mind takes you, and frustrating when nobody appears to understand that you didn't choose to go there. I know from many year's experience that the dark cloud of terror and lonliness will eventually pass over, and I will enjoy a time of relative calm. Please gain strength from the knowledge that you really are not alone, and that there are people who are listening to you here, and who are affected by your words and therefore care about your well-being even though they know you only through what you write on this forum. X