I hate myself so much

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I sure know where your coming from, Berserker....

All of my online friends are in other countries. Yea, it is hard because you think you will probably never meet them...there is a possibility that you might though.

There's no community colleges here as far as I know. And I won't be able to move out when I'm 18, because I'm too dependent on my mum.




I only like video games... I used to do homeschooling, but all the work was too hard for me.

I should talk to nanna about what's going on. She might listen to me. If I talk to mum, she'll get mad with me, like she tends to.

Well, only you can change you.

I want to be interested in something else, but everything costs money these days.

What do you want to be interested in?

I find it hard to believe the schoolwork was too hard. You communicate very well on line.
Surely they should be able to set the curriculum to your level and build from there.

Talking with your nana seems like a really good idea - it is a way of moving forward - I think as long as you can do some thing everyday that helps you to move forward in life or learn something new - this can offer hope.

I wonder - does any one know of any on line courses that are free I really have no idea about this - librarys (sp?) are free - could you develop an interest through reading or learning from libary books.

My daughter taught herself Japanese - mainly through books and audio cassettes.

Could you put some sort of structured routine into your day - keep a strict timetable.

Perhaps you could work at becoming independent by learning how to cook.

I don't know - just throwing out ideas here. Let me know if you have any thoughts.

Maybe you could go to a rest home/ hospital and help give fluids at morning tea or read the newspaper to someone. Are you allowed a pet?? Could you advertise to feed or walk someones pets in the school holidays?

Self-employment, nice, stress-free. Berserker, it sounds like you have social anxiety... I'm the same way about obligations!

Speaking of pets, I used to have one. I had a pet hermit crab, but since we couldn't afford a heater for the tank, she died. I also used to have pet fish, but they died of old age. I haven't had a pet since. I'd really like a pet bearded dragon, but I'd have to get a reptile lisence, and that would cost a lot of money.

I know; I want a bear for a pet!

Mhm... Perhaps being alone and friendless isn't as bad as I thought. I mean, I have more time to do what I want. No one can bother me, and I prefer being alone. I've been alone for so long, that I'm used to it.

You need to strike a balance. Don't alienate yourself from other people, but you should simultaneously relish the time you have by yourself.

I just gotta work out how to find people to talk to then.

I just had a look at Murray Bridge to see if there was some sort of Community College etc.. anything.

http://www.murraybridge.communityguide.com.au/

I give up.... you're gonna have to move.

I didn't think it would be quite so desolate.

You need to spread your wings a bit but without cash....

I think your best bet would be to look for work, or go back and finish school. They're not allowed to kick you out. The SA government wouldn't allow that surely...

Also - consider what I said about a computer. It it will help you, it's well worth the money.

You express yourself well.

You can learn the details of a video game, the characters, the related plushies, so there is nothing wrong in your ability to gather and organize knowledge.

You are good with that Internet thing.

I looked up Murray Bridge, not much going on.

What I saw was a small area very suitable for growing lettuce.

From the ariel views I see lots of smaller family farms, and I imagine that harvesting and packing lettuce are most of the local economy.

Just because information is in books, does not mean people can understand it.

Become an expert at the Lettuce Video Game.

In my own life I wandered about in the desert, because of an interest in Geology. Me and my bike were something like the guy with the flying machine in Mad Max, but I was socially acceptable because I would would answer any question about Geology, and as the locals put it, we have spoken to Geologists, and never understood a word they said, you translate Geology into plain Cowboy, and we understand everything.

Some can take knowledge from books, learn the meaning of the vocabulary of the field, and can express that in plain speach.

Here, with the help of The US Dept. of Agriculture, many pamflets are published for farmers, that mostly are twenty years out of date, if not fifty. Seed companies sell what they have to sell, and new markets are often learned from the customers, who have no idea how to grow things, or that the world has seasons.

1, Murray Bridge has a climate suitable for growing lettuce.

2. It has a soil that works,

3. It has labor to harvest, pack, ship.

4. As far as I can see this is the economy.

You are good.

The climate of the last twenty years is recorded.

The soil has been typed, mapped, for there are varities within soil types.

Lettuce is not just Iceburg and Romain, even within them there are variaties,

Some ripen early, produce more per acre, use more or less water.

Farmers are the most conservative of people, and often the worst readers.

What information there is is fragmented, and what I do, which I think is an AS trait, is to organize.

The National Lettuce Expert is not from Murray Bridge, nor are the seed companies, they have a general problem, and do not focus on the local problem.

Murray Bridge does has a very local problem and the whole economy depends on it.

Learn Lettuce, everything about it is still a small subject.

Life is an RPG. Your skills are far beyond a farmer in gathering knowledge, and starting with compiling what is known, climate, growing season, soils, varaiaties, market prices for types, and costs for fertilizer, labor, crates, see the overall economic picture.

Where does it go from Murray Bridge, how is it marketed?

Who makes the crates? The paper labels? Learn the industry.

I think you will find it is all less complicated than FF IIII.

It all comes down to money in for money and labor out, and a 1% change is huge to a farmer.

Like your video games, it takes time to learn, to track down the cheat sheets on the games, find the holes, which is just what we look for in economics, and you think about where the game could be improved, and what the next edition might be like.

Farmers are not good at this type of thinking, but they can understand the results.

What you have is a desire to win at games, and your whole town is playing a game badly.

You need a Lettuce Obsession.

!. It will improve your self education in Biological Science.

2. You should understand the economics of the world you live in.

3. It is not hard for an AS person to learn more about a subject than people who have been doing it all their life.

4. Lettuce farmers want to hear about lettuce farming. Hard to find information.

5. The Murray Bridge paper is hard up for news.

6. You write well, once you know the field, they would publish articles

7. Leading the local Lettuce RPGers to higher profits and a larger market share, is a lot of money for 1% more points.

8. The secret to making money is find a place where large amounts change hands, put yourself in the middle, and become highly valued.

9. Your social value goes up for even trying, supporting the home team, and if you help them score, you become Princess Berserker.

10. It can all be done by home study, and on the Internet. You can e-mail articles to the paper, and take comments from farmers by e-mail, or that old stuff with stamps.

11. You are more social than a farmer. Find those big city restaurants, and upscale fine food stores who would like a few crates of better lettuce, and hook them up with local farmers. Ten crates can produce more profit than a hundred, marketing is moving from mass market, with small profits, to custom production with high profits.

12. Doing something, anything, is better than doing nothing. You have the power to help the whole town.

Like I'm going to move out of this town. I'm stuck here anyway.