23 Oct 2018, 4:20 pm
23 Oct 2018, 4:30 pm
My employer's internet logs were a particular point of interest when I was made redundant from that job!
(Just you watch that dirty mind of yours, you!
)The stupidest thing was that I just pretended I was fine for months on end, and had absolutely no illusion that hyperfocusing on my special interests instead of working would go unnoticed; the more I got away with it, the more I did it. I think maybe I wanted to get caught, to finally bring the situation to a head and stop myself procrastinating about it. Thankfully, once my poor mental health and pending autism assessment were known, the redundancy was actually dealt with very amicably. I wouldn't have wanted to stay, because I genuinely liked the boss and my colleagues, and I did feel very guilty about it (guilt tripping myself is always a great idea when I'm already depressed, I find!
)I was always less anxious when I was in front of a screen ( less human interaction ) and at break times instead of being in the canteen I stayed in front of the screen watching youtube etc. I had a really bad breakdown in work when I was in charge for a week , I should of just quit after day one but I felt some stupid sense of loyalty and tried to push through it - big mistake , I'm still recovering 4 years later but an ASD diagnosis came out of it so it's not all bad.
23 Oct 2018, 7:28 pm
I'm not interested in managing anything in particular, I just want to do solid engineering stuff. Working around people isn't as much a problem for me as working with undue pressure. I was a database admin/lead developer (:lol:) last year and despite whining & freaking out about the project for eleven months, my clientele decided to skip the entire bill, as well as budgeting for the required servers in the first place.
Now I do cool stuff for the same money & actually get paid, so there's that. I just want no part of the greed-based oversight process in which everyone on top of the hierarchy disdains those who would have them do any work at all.
_________________
"Standing on a well-chilled cinder, we see the fading of the suns, and try to recall the vanished brilliance of the origin of the worlds."
-Georges Lemaitre
"I fly through hyperspace, in my green computer interface"
-Gem Tos
23 Oct 2018, 7:31 pm
Whaaa! You are very personable dude. Well you are here anyway imo.
Well what I've been asking about is how to make close friends comfortable talking to me electronically. There's a lot of reproach on their part considering how jaded I am about social networks and even texting; I'm in need of a better way for someone to ask me weird hacker questions & also personal stuff without imposing awkwardness where none should exist.
_________________
"Standing on a well-chilled cinder, we see the fading of the suns, and try to recall the vanished brilliance of the origin of the worlds."
-Georges Lemaitre
"I fly through hyperspace, in my green computer interface"
-Gem Tos
23 Oct 2018, 7:34 pm
23 Oct 2018, 7:41 pm
23 Oct 2018, 7:46 pm
I'd say that's mostly just my perception although I'm frequently told of others distaste for large helpings of my technical knowledge. Hopefully this next bit explains where I'm coming from:
To be fair that's just one particularly nasty executive-type dude. Everyone I actually work with is really cool. We're basically tasked with beating Microsoft at their own game in a completely different field, which I was already into. Thus, getting this stuff out of my head for long enough to actually coexist in the same chunk of space time as those who know me is a major struggle.
I was just explaining to the only person who's ever really gone out with me that I think my lifestyle is unfair to her & basically everyone, in that I live in a completely different culture most of the time & that it's saddening not being able to include friends in it.
_________________
"Standing on a well-chilled cinder, we see the fading of the suns, and try to recall the vanished brilliance of the origin of the worlds."
-Georges Lemaitre
"I fly through hyperspace, in my green computer interface"
-Gem Tos
23 Oct 2018, 7:58 pm
23 Oct 2018, 8:02 pm
I'm trying to let word of mouth carry my bizarre knowledge to distant corners if you will. I need to let the sum total of my friends' much fuller social lives converge around me or I have no idea what's going to happen.
It's not that I think that will be an issue, I'm simply concerned that I might disappear completely into the tech realm.
_________________
"Standing on a well-chilled cinder, we see the fading of the suns, and try to recall the vanished brilliance of the origin of the worlds."
-Georges Lemaitre
"I fly through hyperspace, in my green computer interface"
-Gem Tos
23 Oct 2018, 8:08 pm
It's not that I think that will be an issue, I'm simply concerned that I might disappear completely into the tech realm.
You doing something right dude as you have friends.
All work and no play makes jack a dull boy but pays the bills and secures your future.
disappear into the tech realms ? You have seen Tron haven't you
23 Oct 2018, 10:57 pm
Well my concern is that technology might take too much of my mind over for me to relate to them any more.
My future is either completely secure or not at all considering I live in the central U.S.
_________________
"Standing on a well-chilled cinder, we see the fading of the suns, and try to recall the vanished brilliance of the origin of the worlds."
-Georges Lemaitre
"I fly through hyperspace, in my green computer interface"
-Gem Tos
24 Oct 2018, 1:12 pm
I'm waiting for 90GB of file xfers to a usb2.0 flash drive.
Ok now it's lunch.
_________________
"Standing on a well-chilled cinder, we see the fading of the suns, and try to recall the vanished brilliance of the origin of the worlds."
-Georges Lemaitre
"I fly through hyperspace, in my green computer interface"
-Gem Tos
24 Oct 2018, 1:30 pm
24 Oct 2018, 1:38 pm
I do have a really good pizza place 5 minutes from my desk. Of course this also means I'm just that much further behind on workouts but at least I shift my own gears on commutes.
Writing code & driving a manual are just two of the lost arts I practice. I want to share that stuff with people who don't know why they should even care to learn.
_________________
"Standing on a well-chilled cinder, we see the fading of the suns, and try to recall the vanished brilliance of the origin of the worlds."
-Georges Lemaitre
"I fly through hyperspace, in my green computer interface"
-Gem Tos
Last edited by cberg on 24 Oct 2018, 6:31 pm, edited 1 time in total.
24 Oct 2018, 1:43 pm
24 Oct 2018, 5:55 pm
Ok now it's lunch.
You'd have to come back tomorrow if you were using my living room PC and usb2.0
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