The hardest part for you about having AS is:

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samsplanet
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31 Dec 2007, 10:02 am

People thinking that my ADD and AS are just bad habits that can be fixed. Yeah, right :? Either that or they don't believe me... which leads to the inevitable NT conclusion that I'm a messy cow, or I'm rude, or I'm bored, or I'm indifferent, or I have the social skills of a dead rabbit...


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Ragtime
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31 Dec 2007, 10:31 am

corroonb wrote:
Being aware of the image I project most of the time and being unable to change this. I don't like looking people in the eyes and I usually have a blank expression too. People don't generally like this combination as I think that they think I'm dishonest and/or guilty.


I have this a lot. I can't do one of those "Trust me" expressions that salesmen, lawyers, doctors, and anchormen seem to be able to slap on their faces at will, regardless of whether they're telling the truth or not. My "trust me" expression looks like something like this: 8O . Needless to say, it is not successful except with people who have learned that this is the expression I use when being totally honest.


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Grimfaire
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31 Dec 2007, 12:04 pm

Knowing that no matter how hard I work; I'll always be second rate because I'm unable to process social interactions and send messages different than what I want to send.


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31 Dec 2007, 12:18 pm

That I'll always have to work, twice as hard as everybody else, to be taken seriously.


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02 Jan 2008, 9:27 am

Grimfaire wrote:
Knowing that no matter how hard I work; I'll always be second rate because I'm unable to process social interactions and send messages different than what I want to send.


It's really amazing and stupid how much socializing ability is equated with "success". If you're a great office worker, for example, but don't go to, or do well at, office social functions, then all of a sudden you're looked down on as an employee -- which is, of course, an insane valuation. And you can suffer lack of raises, or termination, just because "you don't fit in."


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chinapig
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02 Jan 2008, 9:32 am

Not being able to read without it exhausting me mentally.

It doesn't stop me, but it does make me think twice :(



m91
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02 Jan 2008, 10:46 am

Ana54 wrote:
Being misunderstood.


Ditto.


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The_New_Writer
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02 Jan 2008, 4:13 pm

Must I make one sentence?! There are alot of things I don't like about AS. But I like it all the same, the fact that I'm different comforts me. But I just don't like being misinterpreted. Thats my whole issue, really.



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02 Jan 2008, 5:28 pm

Actually knowing what's going on in life - its so much more pleasant when your dumb.



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05 Jan 2008, 7:56 am

m91 wrote:
Ana54 wrote:
Being misunderstood.


Ditto.


for me too.

that is in so many ways too. for one thing, being misunderstood as a person in general. and also when im trying to explain things, and for other people to know that im not trying to be a pain or pest if i cant understand them.



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05 Jan 2008, 10:27 am

I think the worst part is accepting yourself for who you are and then being persecuted for being okay with it.

I hate the feeling of being pointed at and laughed at behind my back. I can't stop it. I don't really care. But it bothers me just the same not being able to explain myself and making others understand.


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techstepgenr8tion
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05 Jan 2008, 1:33 pm

Liverbird wrote:
I think the worst part is accepting yourself for who you are and then being persecuted for being okay with it.


Or the opposite of that - having people telling you that you aren't embracing yourself for who you are because you're striving at refining your social skills and meeting NT's strictly on NT level. People are wired in all kinds of different ways so that you can have two people being completely true to themselves with AS and going completely different directions - a lot of people don't seem to get that.

So lets make a deal, you don't let yourself be coerced and I won't either :).



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05 Jan 2008, 3:32 pm

techstepgenr8tion wrote:
Liverbird wrote:
I think the worst part is accepting yourself for who you are and then being persecuted for being okay with it.


Or the opposite of that - having people telling you that you aren't embracing yourself for who you are because you're striving at refining your social skills and meeting NT's strictly on NT level. People are wired in all kinds of different ways so that you can have two people being completely true to themselves with AS and going completely different directions - a lot of people don't seem to get that.

So lets make a deal, you don't let yourself be coerced and I won't either :).


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Wilco
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05 Jan 2008, 4:11 pm

I think the hardest thing fo rme is to not know wether I will find a true love or not, and knowing that I have As will make it harder to find a true love. I know I shouldn't think like this but its not something I can control :(



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05 Jan 2008, 4:40 pm

Quote:
wilco said:
I think the hardest thing fo rme is to not know wether I will find a true love or not, and knowing that I have As will make it harder to find a true love. I know I shouldn't think like this but its not something I can control Sad


Well, I was younger than you when I met my wife.

You're at school - hopefully with males and females.

(I forgot to check your gender on your profile, so I'm assuming your male - if I'm wrong just swap the male/female comments).

Find a few, tease them (lightly), complement them, flirt etc.. get as much practice as you can NOW. If you need to, do what I did, pick on some girls who are a couple of years below you. That way you won't face competition from your year group. Girls seem to like older boys, so you should have less trouble with the boys in the same year as the Girl.

When one girl responds a bit, she'll probably say she likes you.

Don't get bogged down in waiting for the special one - ie: the one with your name stickytaped to the back of her head - she doesn't exist....

Go in for the romance, kiss her etc.. It gets much harder to meet people as you get older. Girls will be more forgiving of your mistakes at this age.

It doesn't have to be a permanent relationship but it's the perfect opportunity to learn and get prepared so that you don't end up lonely - and who knows, you might end up marrying her after all (my wife and I got married 10 years after we left school - (we were at school together for four years) and we've been married now for 10 years. So all up 24 years.



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06 Jan 2008, 12:38 am

Wilco wrote:
knowing that I have As will make it harder to find a true love.:(


That made me chuckle a bit. I don't know NTs as examples of anything that's true.


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