Rants

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All I can say is: stick to your guns.

You know what you are about. Other people really don't know.

Get that book published! Get that painting sold!

Prove the naysayers wrong.

I agree with enjoyment, too!

.. I don't want any money. I mean, money isn't entirely the point why I wanna be employed. I somewhat found 'it', sometime during while I'm subbing for the past days this week.

I wanna roam the earth -- while able to sustain myself at the same time without neglecting myself. I wanna try all sorts of 'roles' and responsibilities, explore... I never mourned for a 'normal life', but why are they so damn insistent?!

I understand the necessity, the social demands, 'reality'.
And that, they are concerned -- but it's just one if not the only way way of life they knew. They are just afraid to let anyone to dive into that unknown... I don't like it when they worry...
The main way to let them worry less, is to represent myself as competent and independent no matter how atypical I represent -- which isn't currently the case save for the latter. But that's what I'm aiming for.

I should learn to stop feeling guilty. There are many things that I've yet to resolve within me -- and guilt is a huge one.


Yeah, it's very counteractive against of how most autistics would do things -- 'stability', 'predictability'...
Needs or not, that's not what I want in life. And what I want in this life isn't something spectacular -- it's not very big.

In fact, it was something so simple, that many tend to overlook and underestimate it -- that includes myself.

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Are there any neurotypicals capable of chewing with their mouths shut????? What an awful f*****g sound.

I'm for enjoying life, too. Not just amusing yourself, but really living life. I used to read for information and pleasure, do crossword puzzles and watch tennis. Now, I still do those things, but I also live my life. I actually take tennis lessons. it makes me appreciate what my favorite players do even more.

I just had came to a conclusion that I'm possibly subclinically depressed.
But that's not the point of my post here.


The point is that, since I've been subbing for a week I'm doing fine. Except for one thing...

I kept breaking stuff for some reason even if I was being careful. I know I'm a bit too physically strong for someone in my own stature (skinny 5'4 weighing less than 50kg) but this is getting ridiculous.
At the very first day of subbing, I broke a newly installed faucet. Then I broke the secretary phone for apparently pressing it too hard. Today, I broke off a 3x3 something feet sized metallic sliding window off it's rails. At least the glass wasn't broken, it was just too thick and too heavy.

This is becoming more of a joke. I'm laughing. Laughing in embarrassment.

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Sounds that annoy the f**k out of me:-

-The upstairs neighbour vacuuming above me or doing any other sort of noisy activity which she seems to do all day long

-Cars with loud engines or loud motorcycles going by

-Kids whining, crying, shouting, giggling or screaming in stores

-Dogs with high-pitched barks that don't stop barking

-Plates and dishes clanging together

-People with loud coughs or sneezes, and people who do about 20 sneezes in a row

Joe90,

Those noises annoy me, too!

If I say something, I mean it and I remember it, for instance: I'll buy you a drink next time we meet. When they say something, most of the time they forget it. Do they even mean it? My friends are also included in that, but I forgive them.

So erm this cute guy I know irl said on twitter that he had a crush on someone and I said that I had a crush on someone too and he went really quiet because I'm that undesirable

Maybe he has a crush on you...

Hmm maybe? It's just so complicated.

I'm disgusted by and sick of mopey whiners (boo hoo!), snowflakes, idiot questions, ppl who need to be coddled, ppl who lack self awareness, misogynists, ppl who watch their TV's on the train without headphones, ppl who BLOCK THE DOORS on the train or who WEAR THEIR BACKPACK at rush. They all need a good hard slap upside the head.