scale of -10 to +10, how do you feel right now?

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-10

Because of homework in one of my classes, I ended up missing an indie music festival that was in town tonight. That is one of my special interests, and I ended up missing an opportunity to possibly meet fellow liberals.

I am now considering asking people to renounce Christianity, even though I practice it myself.

That sucks *hugs*
Couldn't you have stayed up to do a cruddy job on it, just for the one night?

Maybe just go outside or drive somewhere without people around to scream? Punch a couple pillows? Shred some paper? Vent in your journal?

I might just try punching some pillows but I might get carried away since I do have knives and swords at my disposal.

I didn't go out with my friend, I called but he didn't answer. I was going to tell him something came up. I wouldn't have been lying, something did come up, my hatred for the castrated sheep he hangs out with. Being Friday night, sheep are all over the place. In my current state of depression, my hatred for sheep has greatly increased. I know I shouldn't feel this way but the sheep that infest society are part of the reason I feel like this and the other part is mine for letting them make me feel this way.

I think I might imagine my pillow is one of those sheep and take out my anger on it though that might make me more likely to use a weapon. Well, it's better than on a person.

Use the weapon if you have to. Try using a cheap pillow just in case. I think releasing your anger is worth $10 to get a new pillow

Yeah, you're right. The smile that came to my face upon realizing that disturbs me a little. I want to use my replica Masamune (Sephiroth's sword) but there isn't enough room in my room.

Did you just change your avatar? I like it!

I thought the festival would last all night. Instead, it lasted only about an hour.

I pretend to conform because of what I read in a history class about the Kent State incident in 1970.

Last edited by Tim_Tex on 11 Apr 2008, 10:51 pm, edited 1 time in total.

about a 7 now
*sings the lonely song*

I want to curl up into a ball and sleep and let enough time pass to where I may walk the worlds as a lone organism that can be left to play God by her own means.

Had a lot of sensory issues today, despite being on a road-trip with my two best friends. -5

1

Feeling a little better, got some anger out but still a little depressed. I talked with mother about it for a while and she told me I should think about going on an anti-depressant. I would like to stay off of them if at all possible but at this rate I may not have a choice.

3. Yesterday was the first decent day I'd had in a while. The mental image of someone eviscerating a pillow with a sword also cheered me up a bit.

7. friday z0mg.

-10. I want out of this hellhole. I want real food. I want to go to work. I want to go to school. I want to drive my car. I want to blast dragonforce and roll the window down and drive slowly past populated bus stops. I hate this place.

4-5 maybe 6 later if I'm lucky. Going to a club event don't really wanna go b/c the I had hoped liked me doesn't and now I've got no special reason to go anymore just hoping I can enjoy it a little.

Cared for 9

Body still unwell 4

-7

Feeling down again. I keep having these thoughts of worthlessness that while a small part of me knows they can't be true, the dominant part tells me they are. I've never been this depressed before. Why is this happening to me now, when I just got back into college? Why wasn't I depressed years ago when I had no direction or goals in my life? What happened to the strength I had at the beginning of the year?