gone from one extreme to another
used to get no attention from girls at all.
and now only in the past week or so it seems like i'm getting downright plenty.
and it has me feeling edgy since i'm so utterly unused to it.
sure, it's obliterated my depression and i've felt absurdly confident, but the attention seems to have become somewhat addictive.
and now i'm facing unprecedented dilemmas with ethics, maintaining multiple new friendships and watching each of them turn flirtatious or potentially so because i've become an attention-whore in a sense of the term and dispense out compliments and niceties reflexively that are meeting with unexpectedly positive results.
the point being i haven't committed to any one person, but i feel guilty that i seem to be initiating stuff with multiple girls at once.
not sure how to handle this new realm of influence. and somewhere at the back of my mind i have the feeling that if i continue down this path i'm going to have become a horrible person with a shallow reputation. but it's all so fun and highly amusing.
and besides, i'm really not at a point where i want anything serious. waiting to get a car & job. i want to be able to walk into it with a sense of financial readiness and smooth practicality.
so far without trying i've already acquired a cutie friend with benefits i haven't met yet, and offer from another decent looking girl who wanted to be BF/GF, a myriad of flirtatious comments, flattery, and generally alot of looks and girls being uncommonly friendly toward me.
am i overreacting?
advice is appreciated
_________________
+Blog: http://itsdeeperthanyouknow.blogspot.com/
+"Beneath all chaos lies perfect order"
Well I guess there is something to be said for on the one hand handling scarcity, and on the flip side handling prosperity. Both sides of the coin present their own challenges, although in most surveys people will tend to be more willing to deal with the circumstances surrounding the latter than the former (myself included haha).
Just curious, as you reflect upon all of this, what do you think has changed in just the past week that has yielded drastically different outcomes with the ladies compared to all the weeks and years prior? Was there something that you consciously did differently in your approach that changed things?
I don't think there is anything wrong or "unethical" about flirting with different women and seeing how things start out (as long as the lady friend understands that at the moment, there is no firm commitment to see one another exclusively and that you may be occupying your social life with other women). The main thing I would point out is that you are not doing anything wrong. You aren't cheating anyone else, you are just trying to have fun and interact with different women. Sure at some point you may have to reject other people if you decide that you want to become exclusive with a particular gal, and while it's never fun to see others hurt, it's nothing to feel too guilty about. Everyone knows rejection. So do your best to relax and enjoy the new experiences, and remember that these are good problems to have!
I'm in exactly the same situation as the OP. I have learned to deal with it in my own way but the only one I really care about is unavailable. Not much I can do about it but I shouldn't really complain.
I would give you some advice but I think DylanMckay has explained everything better than I could.
i still have lapses of being shy & not talkative but i'm making better impressions.
i've been accused of being too cute to be single.
they thought i must've been either taken or gay
i'm not used to feeling this consistently good about myself. and it's like a shock to my system. overrloadd.
_________________
+Blog: http://itsdeeperthanyouknow.blogspot.com/
+"Beneath all chaos lies perfect order"
Just curious, as you reflect upon all of this, what do you think has changed in just the past week that has yielded drastically different outcomes with the ladies compared to all the weeks and years prior? Was there something that you consciously did differently in your approach that changed things?
I don't think there is anything wrong or "unethical" about flirting with different women and seeing how things start out (as long as the lady friend understands that at the moment, there is no firm commitment to see one another exclusively and that you may be occupying your social life with other women). The main thing I would point out is that you are not doing anything wrong. You aren't cheating anyone else, you are just trying to have fun and interact with different women. Sure at some point you may have to reject other people if you decide that you want to become exclusive with a particular gal, and while it's never fun to see others hurt, it's nothing to feel too guilty about. Everyone knows rejection. So do your best to relax and enjoy the new experiences, and remember that these are good problems to have!
and yeah, while it may not be wrong, it just feels wrong in a way. i'm not cheating on anyone but i feel like a player now in some ways, lol, or as my friend Dylan Roberts would say, a "mind slayer," and i just feel like i'm being inconsiderate just a bit to the individual girls i have been somewhat shamelessly flirting with lately
but i suppose i'll find a way to resolve that.
_________________
+Blog: http://itsdeeperthanyouknow.blogspot.com/
+"Beneath all chaos lies perfect order"
