I'm Frustrated and Angry at my NT friends

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Ok I need to vent. Last night I and a friend (female who I wish was more than a friend) were talking and she let drop she sort of admired me. I was a little thrown so she explained that she wouldn't have been as forgiving as I am to people who treat her badly. She asked what i'd be unwilling to give up and I told her if it came between choosing between a normal life wiht a loving wife I'd surender all my plans to make that happen. She replied I made her feel sad so I told her not to be sad but she said she was sad for me.

It didn't bother me at all, till around 3am. I woke up and couldn't get back to sleep so I just stared at the cealing fan and began to think. My dad didn't save anything for my education, as a result I had to pay for my entire college education by working my butt off and going into debt, but he did pay for my younger NT brother. He also didnt ever think about the massive disruptions that occured evertime he moved to a new church when it got to tough or he got bord. I also never once remember another family member agreeing to give up a single minute of their time for me but putting plans on hold for them.

I did have a good buddy tear up his car to get me to help when I got hurt in death valley, were true blood brothers. None of my other friends ever did like that for me, and I am beginning to see that many would mearly stand there and do nothing. Sure I did have a few call me up when my grandmother died but you could count them all on one hand without using all the digits. I got shot by a punk in New Orleans (mugged me and paniked)and had to stay in the hospital for a while and save for my blood brother and my parents no one visited for nearly three weeks.

I've been angry at them all day. I've helped them in a thousand different ways over the years but I never can recall even one of them giving me so much as a single minute of their time when I was feeling down. I gave up so much for them but not a single one of them ever gave me the time of day. I'm angry to the point of furry with them all. Sorry folks needed to vent this anger before I explode.

Luckily I don't think I've been in a situation as bad as you have (being shot?! Ouch! I feel sorry for you ). However, just recently I ran into a situation similar to the one you described with that girl. There was this girl in my Psycholinguistics class that kinda liked (and I thought she liked me too...if ya know what I mean ). So when she greeted me this one day she asked if I wanted to go with her to lunch. I didn't realize 'till later she was just doing this as a FRIEND (or, rather, acquaintance, which IMO is even worse) She said she'd been in a relationship since she was 16 (and on the 6th year of this relationship she got married!! Holy heck! She was only TWENTY or so...) So that ALONE proves how socially savvy she is. And as if THAT wasn't enough, she also hangs around this crowd of people in my college who are WAAAAYYYY more socially savvy than I am (like a college equivalent of a "cool" group in high school). I'm kinda-sorta friends with 'em too, but not the way she is. At most, the only things I do with (some of) these people outside of school is make comments about things they've put on their Facebook page (I don't even chat with them outside of school). This girl (her name's Sam - short for Samantha), however, knows one of these guys' PHONE NUMBERS, and also has gone with them to a local restaurant near the campus they always hang out at a couple times (I've never been invited ) Most of them, as you mighta guessed, are NT. Supposedly one of them is an Aspie, but he tries to come off like he's NT (and he seems to have done a good job fooling them, unlike me I get treated more as the "little brother" in this group, which isn't bad, but it's kind of a letdown knowing I'm not FULLY accepted into their circle )

Ya see, since psycholinguistics is an "obscure" subject (or so I thought...), I thought maybe Sam would be quirkier than she turned out to be. She wasn't She said she was gonna major in linguistics so I really thought there'd be a chance. Bummer! A lot of the Aspie girls I've met (except the one I know IRL, Emelia, who is "taken") seem to be more brooding and angst-y than the Aspie guys I know - most of them are more silly and fun to be around So I thought that maybe I should stick to whatever would be the closest to "Aspie" in the NT world (plus I know some of you on WP got sick of my "any girls on here..." posts so I decided to stop those for you guys). Does anyone have any idea what the closest thing to "Aspie" would be in a "normal" society? My mom has suggested church girls might fit this description, but I would only want to be their friend (for fear that our beliefs might become too intensely conflicting if we really got deep into a relationship with one another). Why does it seem like (NT) girls lose ALL their innocence once they reach 13?! It's really sad It'd be nice to find an NT girl who was at least MOSTLY innocent.

Also please note that by "innocent" I'm not necessarily referring to people who are "goody-two shoes" who "follow all the rules" (quite frankly, anyone who IMPOSES these rules on OTHERS can get pretty annoying pretty fast to me). I'm more referring to people who are hopeless romantics (in a more naive way than most), are touched by bittersweet moments in movies, songs, and books, as well as real life, and are generally just sweet people who are nevertheless "edgy" enough to know that "bittersweet" and "romantic" don't ALWAYS mean "G-rated" (a lot of people on my mom's side tend to think along the lines of watching "safe" movies that are bittersweet and/or romantic, although my mom herself isn't always like this, and my cousin Alyson definitely isn't). I'm also referring to people who are more quiet and not as socially savvy as most people in the world, who maybe have a social group of about 3 or 4 people they've known from an early age instead of these groups of 10 or 12 who have only come to know each other (for the most part) in college (or at the earliest LATE high school).

Anyway that's my, story. And like you, redeagle, I ALSO felt the need to vent