Down in flames

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Perfect title. Before last week I was doing perfect but I suddenly realized that I was out of touch with reality, thinking I am going to start 5 or more businesses and making hundreds of millions each. My brain is still missing and am trying to find it. I am in World War 2 flying a plane and just got shot down in battle, with flames surrounding me and my plane. Suddenly I crash into the ground but it doesn't stop until I reach Hell. The Universe is full of Darkness which is me, I am known as the Dark One. Last week I was happy and thinking positive and met someone who had the same interests as me and I talked a mile a minute. Up and down just like the stock market. Its raining over here like usual. Right now I hear cows mooing. The technology out here is limited but luckily our family is the highest tech. I am reading things that confirm everything I believe. My mom also needs surgery, for awhile it looked like her shoulder needed to be replaced but the doc said that could wait maybe until next year. Part of her knee needs to be replaced her whole body is falling apart and now she's sick....again. Same stuff different day. I went to a psychiatrist last month and got on poisons she said I was nuts. That is what they are paid to do! All computers do is crash just like me. I thought I was being followed earlier today by the Gov. The preparations are increasing, helicopters flew over my house yesterday and they were different than the rest. I also recently saw where the entrance to the underground headquarters is for the gov, they put satellite dishes and military vehicles on the surface. I hate being part robot and I still feel depressed. Our car needs expensive repairs and we are a starving artist. I love talking to rats since that is our future. I bet they will talk back. In a magazine they said that cloaking devices are coming "sooner than thought possible" that's what they are saying to the public, they actually have them now and told me about it last year. Everything one by one is happening. This power sucks. The aliens are annoying as well. These people are on a schedule. Every few weeks they talk to me. My mood was smooth until the last week. I know no one will believe this, but if it was fake as people will automatically think then why doesn't the poison work and why do they mention this in magazines and the news? To make things worse, we invited soldiers to our house for Thanksgiving (I am NOT worried about the soldiers themselves and I support our troops...also it was my mom's idea) I bet they did a background check on our entire family and all the alerts were going off because of my stupid power of influence. On and off they tell me (since last month when I was in the hospital) I have to prevent a black hole from sucking in a galaxy, don't worry its not this galaxy. Outsiders don't believe me. Brains simply don't exist god is my memory bad! I had this stuff before the news of mom's surgery. The weather does what's in my head most of the time. Rain. No one understands me. Tomorrow I am going to my psych nurse if they don't cancel on me. I am not increasing my evil anti psychotics. I just need someone to understand.

ouch. and I thought my semester was bad.
Don't ask me how to deal with it, I don't know. I just go one day at a time and allow myself only one meltdown a day, which today it is very hard not to do more.
Did writing that all down help? Cause I find it helpful to write it down if no one'll listen. Which is about everyone right now.

Thanks for replying. I hope you are doing well. Writing things down helps a lot.

I too believe that all world events are running to a carefully plotted time scale. Everything I ever believed would happen in my life time, has or is happening. World governments know the truth or some of it, but we are not supposed to know.

The city I live in has suffered a second record breaking heatwave this year, first one was january. Winter was our warmest on record and now spring records have just been smashed. 43 degrees C in November is rediculous, work out what that is in farenhieght. Now we have catestrophic fire warnings issued and for good reason, after loosing almost 600 lives to bushfires last year, there are now hundreds of fresh fires burning in 3 states.

The world today is completely insane, countries argue over soccer matches. Are we hell bent on destroying everything and everyone.

I saw 2012 at the cinema on Sunday. I thought the film was the usual hollywood garbage but the theories behind the movie are prety much spot on in my opinion.

Lets see them try to hide underground when every square inch of the planet is flooded by the oceans.

You communicate your thoughts and feelings well and vividly! Thanks for sharing!


Stress, like your Mum's illness , can amplify our concerns...tapping into the deepst fears that it is all out of control.

I Really BELIEVE it is all out of control in the sense that people have been fiddling too much with IMPOSING CONTROL over nature and stuffed things up. As Aussie Aspie says the climate and a sense of safety are now unpredictable except for that fact ...all is unpredictable.


About 29 years ago I met an American man in Nepal who had worked in an influential position...he told me that then 5 COMPANIES OWNED the planet, instigated wars , political rise and fall etc.... all ecomic based.
He alluded to the oil based problems that confronted the world and much more.... he had quit his job due to his conscience.Of course I only had his word to go on.... TIME has showed that he was not wrong.

We are told to believe that the POWERS that BE have it all in control, that they will act on own best interests and we should turn to all these institutionalised bodies for help.


Great lot of help the 000 ( phone emergency number in OZ was for the Bushfires early this year) I like many others repeatedly dialled whist watching the fires race closer and closer in gale force winds with a temperature in mid forties Celsius. No one answered the F%^&*G 000. Was told that only 14 people were on emergency call centre that day for the entire state of Victoria.( Emergency deals with Fires, ambulance,floods etc)

Communications failure in the so called COMMUNICATIONS AGE!


I have NO faith in any formal institutional systems. All are WHITE RABBITS!
There is another more appropriate word but I can't recall it at the moment... Sweltering
in the heat , no air conditioner and reports of many grass fires all over the state, living on a farm and hoping no forest fires start up this time.
So much of what really happens is
1 Hidden
2 unknown
3 contrived by greed and power
4 and the left hand doesn't know what the right is doing ...to coin the phrase.

Sometimes I think it is completely unrealistic not to be "paranoid".

FireBird--it sounds like you have a lot going on, and I can't imagine how difficult it is.

If you need someone to talk to, feel free to pm me.

I hope that you're doing better.

--David