I feel my real skills are getting me nowhere.

Post Reply New Topic

I'm good at a lot of things that aren't going to get me anywhere in life, like computer programming. I can program computers, but in order to get a job as a computer programmer, I have to get through my community college, then go to a four year school, which will take several years. Assuming I can pass, which I don't think I will. Education isn't about learning. It's about proving your motivation, your organizational skills, and your ability to conform, all of which I lack. Sometimes I wish I could just trade my technical expertise for social skills, because the latter would at least get me some friends and a decent job. What's the point of being good at anything if all that really matters in our society is being like everyone else? It's so frustrating.

Same here. I'm living quite a paradox, as I majored in psychology, so, in theory, I know a lot of things about people, but I have zero skills/motivation to actually interact and right now I spend my working time giving people cigarettes and other suff. Even the most superficial interaction is awkward, it's clear that something doesn't go as usual, some seem scared, some laugh, it's just a wrong situation, but if I can't find anything else I'll have to sustain this crap.

I think I can sum up my problem by saying that I'm book smart but not street smart.

I totally agree with you. I'm so tired of hearing about how much "potential" I have for "someone with my intelligence," if only I could learn to get better at "playing the game." I'm trying so hard I am near the point of burnout.

Sorry, but that's the name of the game. Good social skills will get you a decent job every time, even if there's another applicant who has better technical skills than you.

If two workers are doing the same job, one socializes well but is stupid and lazy, and the other is a genius at the job but hardly talks to anyone and works through lunch every day, its the latter who will get fired when its time to downsize. Every time, without fail. No exceptions.

I wish I could tell you it doesn't always have to be that way and there are things you can do to turn yourself into a chatty, social butterfly and solve this problem forever after, but I'd have to lie. And I suck at lying.

Not true. I am one who has managed to stick it out to the end when almost everyone else has been fired.

I'm still here because I am good at what I do.

I work mostly from home and only go to the office for one or two days every two or three weeks. Maybe a bit more if a new project is starting.

Sure I could have got more money if I was better at the social/communication skills. But I probably would not have been able to make anywhere near as much money or freedom dong anything else.

The good thing about programming is that if you get things done properly and on time people just let you get on with it.

I did have to do the four year school. I did have to start with a 'normal' job. Finding the job was not easy. I did find one with a company that was a bit different to the usual ones. The boss hired people because he 'thought he would like them'. There were quite a few people there who probably would not have fitted in very well in most companies. And we all got along very well.

So, it can be done. Though it is maybe harder now with so much work being done in India etc.

On the other hand, you may never actually need a job. I know one guy who does very well thanks to an internet chat program that he wrote. Build some program or utility that you can sell or license. Or give it away free and provide support or consultancy.

If you can prove to people that you are good or produce something good then you can work with a 'gift of the gab' partner to help you make money out of it.

Society sucks.

I also hate mainstream society.

I have the same problem. My solution was to join the military. Maybe they would yell the shyness out but as long as my mom is still alive its never gonna to happen( yes she's guilt tripping me).

true that. I've seen that happen a few times already, and with ideas that initially sounded like they wouldn't bring much profit (I still don't get how Twitter people make money lol).

and anyway, not all employers look for highly-educated social animals. especially not those in IT business. my boss is the best example - he dropped out of uni after 3 years and he didn't even study programming, he's self-taught in everything and practically a genius (seriously, he knows freaking everything), completely socially unfit and I'm 99% sure he's Aspie. I don't know what his method of recruitment is but most people in my work never studied anything connected to programming, they're all self-taught and they are maniacs of the job. most of them never even graduated.

so maybe try to find some internship in a company that does what you'd like to be doing? after some time you'll learn a lot more from programmers than you ever would in school. you might find out that a school diploma might not even be necessary to get full-time employement.

I would much rather be self taught than go to school. I learn very well by myself; I taught myself advanced mathematics, computer programming, music, and some of the natural sciences. On the other hand, I never pay attention in class and get mediocre grades, and I get nothing out of it. I just don't learn that way. If I were graded on how much I am able to learn, rather than my ability to focus on school work, I would get a lot farther in life.

but college isn't the only route to anything (except teaching or being a surgeon or like that).

have you considered becoming involved in open-source programming projects?

if you're good, you'll become known in the community and it will lead to other things.


just a thought. good luck!

What are your skills LordoftheMonkeys?

Which languages do you know?

Can you do web development?

Tell about a project that you have completed.