hard subject, weight on mind, no-one to trust ?
my girlfriend has AS, and 2 kids (we have been dating for around 7 months). I have a vague diagnosis, I was called mild AS but they said they couldnt diagnose me fully. I think i am just a guy with a few autistic traits. She has a hard life as her kids are a handful and she is being investigated by social services as she home-teaches them and they dont live how mainstream people like (without a tv etc).
as she has AS and needs her own space the visits and investigations are a real nightmare for her, i can imagine how horrible they are, they sound like driving lessons and job interviews but worse. it has makes her life really stressful and makes her want to kill herself. it is very stressful and frightening for me but i cant blame her for feeling that way as it sounds like such a nightmare. it is just so frightening and hard and anger - making that they do it and it upsets her so much, as she does want the best for them, she takes them to all the home-teaching clubs and is very patient with them and has lots of love, i dont think any 1 parent with autistic kids could cope better.
i find it really hard though as i dont really have anyone to talk to about it that understands, i have 2 close friends who both have AS theyre the only people id really talk to about personal problems, but theyre both not really very people skill, not really knowing what to say. My mum and dad care a lot but theyre really old fasioned christians, and theyre so judgemental and gossipy I dont trust them with any sensitive issue. And my GF does not have many friends as she is a very solitary person, so that makes it harder. As i think i would find it easier if i could talk to other people who knew her. she is such a unique person i dont think anyone else would understand expect someone else who knew her. But the few friends she has are all aspies from forums who are very stand-offish and absent and i dont really feel i trust. I worry that she doesnt really have people to depend on except her mother, me and her few AS friends. The stress of worrying about how bad she is really weighs down on me.
Last edited by Tom on 16 Dec 2009, 4:56 am, edited 1 time in total.
lelia
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southwestforests
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Oh dear.
Yeah, both of you could use a friend to lean on.
Those investigations can sometimes come across, depending on the attitude of the case worker, as a "You're guilty till you prove you're not" thing, and that kind of confrontational approach can cause quite a bit of panic.
And for us with AS . . .
I say YES! on the no television.
Kids will be free of the nervousness all the noise
and visual commotion
coming out of that box can induce.
And they will have to do some thinking for themselves how to creatively occupy their time.
Gee, that's just like kids did for the ten thousand years before television.
It's them who grew up each generation to build the societies we live in now. If they could do that then no TV didn't hurt them did it?
Funny, show me the names of all the gang bangers and other juvenile delinquents who come from Home Schooling next to the list of those who do not.
Would imagine that to be an interesting comparison.
Home schooling is scary to the government - they don't have the control and power over those children.
You know, it's funny, government runs public service announcements encouraging parents to spend more time with and to have more involvement with their children to help keep the kids from turning to drugs or violence to fill the gap: and yet, when a parent home schools, thereby getting as involved with their kids to the maximum extent possible, the government thinks the parent is not fit for parenting.
That makes sense how?
Sorry to the max that your girlfriend has become caught up in the battle for control of the children in this country.
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When she is down and stressed, she is often grumpy and snappy which i take personally
I feel angry from how grumpy she is, then i argue , and she can't cope as she is worn out and having a hard time, and then i feel like s**t for fighting and making things worse for her. The good thing to do would be to be sympathetic not let it effect me at those times, but i forget. ![]()
Tory_canuck
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social services investigating someone for homeschooling????Is this Nazi Germany? ![]()
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