What is the point of life?

Post Reply New Topic

Long story, but I have suddenly found myself alone in the world. No family, my SO has died, one friend, who is very ill.

I used to do all the paperwork for the house, tidy the house, go shopping, go to a couple of classes and then my SO would come home. We were going to travel, to discover things, to live life. I thought we were the perfect couple, there were even calls to each other during the working day, and I thought that after two decades, it was a sign of how much we loved each other.

Now that I'm alone, there is no money coming in, and only a very impoverished future to look forward to. I'm have issues that mean that I can't work.

What is the point of life? The money issues aside, all the love, laughter, hope have been washed away. It would seem that while I thought I was living life quietly, it was all an illusion, that the only person who sort of wanted me was shielding me from how empty and pointless everything was.

Losing a friend or mate is depressing for more or less time.

The point of life is to be here to see and hear and do GOOD THINGS.
If you can't do them at least you can see and hear them,
they are God's gift to you that he did for you because you can't.

Think of birds.
They Fly around.
They have no money.
They sing a lot.

The world needs happy bird songs now.
The world needs good news now.
The world needs to see beautiful things now.
The world needs more flower gardens to rest in.

I've never had a SO, but I've lost quite a few people for someone my age. I became depressed.

Depression is the realization of the truths of the universe - that there probably isn't a point of existence, and life is a lousy game you can't win.

The turning point, however, is not this realization itself, but what you do with the knowledge. Unless you manage to achieve selective amnesia somehow, this knowledge will never leave you, and you will either choose to end it all or to keep going.

I am obviously still here.

I'm really sorry for your loss (hugs)

Money certainly isn't the be all & end all of life, not for me anyway. I live on very little, Imean I can feed & clothe myself, I don't really need much more than that.

My grandma recently passed away and it turns out she had no will, leaving me & my sister the sole heirs to her estate, which is about 120k with the bungalow & savings she had. My half should be enough to clear my partner's mortgage, so I've decided rather than let money sit in a bank waiting to be gambled, spent pursuing my obsessions or seeing how many bottles of jack 55k would buy, the house is a more sensable, secure option. At least we will no longer be at risk of losing the house should my partner lose his job or become unable to work, and I will know my grandma's legacy isn't behind a bar or going up in salvia smoke, lol. (oh my lost youth, and I'm only 23 )

We'll also compile a legal document to protect us both in the event one should die, or we should split.

Have you ever considered working from your computer at home? If you don't need to make a lot of money, there are some jobs you can do without many demands from home. You could think about asking a jobs advisor about this?

Also, are you elegable for any state disability/income related benefits?, if you tell me what country you're in, I may be able to find you some links (I'm in the UK, I don't know much about welfare in other countries mind you).

Hi Puzzledaspie, I too am sorry for your loss. It's hard to figure out how to live for oneself. I'm at this place too. It gets easier a day at a time. Some days are unbearably hard too. Figuring out what it is that excites and interests you is a good starting place. The simple pleasures in life are the best. I'm also finding my cats are actually more affectionate and caring to me than people have ever been. With people it's all about them most of the time. It's hard that way to find a space and time for oneself. I started moving through the grief of all my losses by doing small things for myself, like making a cup of tea and a nice dinner, laundering my clothes, showering, keeping my environment tidy and clean. Grief is horrible but it does lessen and diminish with time. Life is definitely worth all the bumps and it's usually just a matter of remembering that during the really painful times. I hope you find those things in life that make you happy, contented and even joyful sometimes. It's really about the little things in life because the big things only let us down after a time. And you won't be alone here, either.

"what is the point of it all"

I ask this question daily, and it is a symptom of depresion. i made a post earlier about seeking help that i think you would benifit from reading..
http://www.wrongplanet.net/postt116912.html

Not sure if this is considered cross posting.. or not .

Seek help ... i know it feels you should be able to handle things alone, but when you get to the point where you are asking yourself questions like that you just don't see the point in doing anything.
Take a chance.. What do you have to loose? That is what finally made me seek help, I figured i had nothing to loose.

Hi Puzzledaspie,

I'm sorry for your loss. I hope you take everything that is said in the other posts to hearth. It are often the little things that get you back on track again. Look at the birds, at their bueautiful coat they wear, the different colours they have. And there are always people who feed them and take care of them.
Some days will be dark and other days there will be a little light. It's not easy to go through life on your own if your not used to it. Like some of the other planeteers have said, your SO might have shelthered you too much. So you're actually have to come to terms with the loss of this person and to learn to 'fend' for your self. Which might be pratical skills or others you might be able to learn in the area where you live.

To me, Ive determined the object of life is to become a better lifeform . . . but the process takes a VERY long time. Evolution is a long and disheartening process, and some die just because they figured out how long it would take for a species to "perfect" itself. We humans are one hell of an exception on this planet because we're not overspecialized to our environments. For example: The shark has had the same form for millions of years, but the only thing that changed was its size . . . it still only does two things . . . eat and mate. Most of the planet's creatures are like this, and may have the addition of territorial instincts. Humans however . . . eat, mate, research, develop, expand, explore, catalog, archive . . . etc. Humans, as we are now, are in a transition state (kinda like a teenager) where we realize how much more we can do as opposed to other creatures, but we still have no idea what we're supposed to do with ourselves.

As for current concerns, money is tight for a good percentage of the population. You must have some other friends who could help out for a while, or check in with some sort of local case management to get yourself jump started. The world is lonely for those who think too much on it . . . face what hinders you now then you can solve the problems of life when society is more stable.

I am so very sorry for your loss. That is a tremendous adjustment to make after that length of time together to have to adjust to life alone. I know that most people would say that it sounds like you have depression. It might be helpful to go to a group for grieving spouses so that at least you have some people that empathize with your situation. It's hard because it is common for anyone to ask the questions you are asking and it is especially hard because I think aspies find ourselves in this state more often than NT's, asking the deep existential questions. But I know in times past when I have had these questions in my head unceasingly I have gone to counselors who have put me on antidepressants. In your situation those feelings would be normal though...I wish I had some salient answers but I will be thinking about you and I am glad you have this forum so that you know that people care.

I wish I could do something to assuage your grief, but I can't. More importantly than the meaning of life, find a way to cope with the current situation. But I know what you mean- it's times like these when people ask what the hell's it all about, and it's times like these we sometimes determine it for ourselves.

Good luck.

Deleted.