WHY THE HELL CANT I BE PERFECT LIKE YOU PEOPLE?

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princess_1989
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04 Aug 2008, 7:18 pm

WHY THE HELL CANT I LIVE A NORMAL SENSIBLE LIFE? I'm sick of always living like a baby.
Heck I'm not as productive as an Aspie, I lean toward the Classic Autism (exaggerating)- For being treated like a baby, and not having maturity, I may as well consider myself with mental retardation. WHAT KIND OF ADULT GETS A WHIPPING- NOT EVEN AN ASPIE.

I JUST WISH I WERE PERFECT LIKE THE DAMN NT's (who need to just go to hell), and you wrongpalnet people!.

I try to act mature, but my attempts are unsuccessful. IF YOU GUYS CAN LIVE BETTER DAMN LIVES AND NOT HAVE BAD MELTDOWNS- then WHY THE f**k CANT I?.

I am sick of this s**t! everyone around me lives like a better adult, and never gets in trouble like a baby, and can control their frustrations better than I. WHY DO I NEED HELP CALMING DOWN LIKE WHEN I AM FRUSTRATED. I DONT CARE IF YOU ALL GET MAD, I"M SICK OF YOU ALL BEING BETTER THAN ME. WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE COMPLINING ABOUT A WHIPPING AS AN ADULT.

YOU DAMN PERFECT ASS PEOPLE!! !! !! Oh and what doesnt my family understand about me WANTING TO BE A BETTER PERSON- yeah they get sick of me repeating that too, but IF I DIDNT HAVE SO MUCH CRAP WITH ME I WOULDNT HAVE TO REPEAT. WHY HAVENT I FOUND ANOTHER ADULT WITH THE SAME PROBLEMS AS ME? I WANT TO BE PERFECT TOO DAMIT. HOW COME I DONT KNOW THE SECRET TO THAT?

I;m giving myself a deadline- by the time I'm 20, and if I'm not a better- perfect, responsible adult lke the rest of the world is, then I'm starving and thirsting myself!! ! Surely thats gotta be happier than being an adult who needs to be BABYSAT,and TREATED LIKE A BABY.

My family dosnt understand my need to wanna be better. NT's ARE Stupid if they dont understand that!! !! !

I'm gonna learn to sail and become a pilot, so I can sail all the way to ANTARTICA, that will make me happier!!, and itll prove i'm just as smart as you all.! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !
I wanna HURRY UP AND BE MATURE _ ON PAR WITH MY AGE
I WANT BETTER NOW. WHY DO I HAVE TO SUFFER, with being EMOTIONALLY IMMATURE?



zeldapsychology
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04 Aug 2008, 7:24 pm

Relax. It'll work out. :-)



Shayne
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04 Aug 2008, 7:49 pm

im 24 and hasnt been successful in achieving this yet.

i ran away from home at 22.


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Last edited by Shayne on 04 Aug 2008, 7:50 pm, edited 1 time in total.

tomboy4good
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04 Aug 2008, 7:49 pm

Princess, I am 46 years old & I still have meltdowns. I'm not nearly as productive as I feel I should be, I can't pursue my dreams due to lack of encouragement/money/resources, & often get sensory overload, etc. I am not perfect nor will I ever be & have had my nose rubbed in that fact since I was just a toddler. My mother still complains about me & has even embarrassed me in front of others as recent as March.

My mom used to "whip me" often enough, & into my teens. I feel for you, but at the same time (being a mom now), I can see both sides. Throwing temper tantrums won't get you anywhere. My own daughter also has this same issue & all I can say is that everyone ends up frustrated &/or angry. It just plain aggravates the situation. You should not get spankings/whippings. However, you will need to learn to get along in this less than perfect world with less than perfect people (including yourself & your family). Your parents/family members are not perfect, but they are all human. Maturation takes time, it may take you longer than the majority of people. Maybe everyone around you (including you) should try to lower your expectations & see where that gets you. Take one thing at a time, one moment at a time. Saying that everyone around you including here at WP is better than you are is a sure sign that you have not reached maturity. It is only through trial & error that you will get there & it will take time...perhaps lots of it!

I wish you luck!


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chocoholic
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04 Aug 2008, 9:00 pm

You said you want to be perfect like us at WP. Well, nobody here, or anyone for that matter, is perfect. As my mom would say to me when I get into perfectionistic moods, if we were perfect, we'd be God. :wink: So rather than trying to be perfect, just do the best you can, as that's all anyone can ask of you. People who ask any more than that or make you feel that your best isn't good enough should be ignored.

I also went through a tough time when I was 18. Not with the whippings you're describing, but I was very emotionally f***ed up at the time and thought I would never be able to get past it. From someone who's now 25 and has come out the other end, I can tell you it will get better for you. Maybe not today or tomorrow, maybe not even in the very short term, but trust me, it will get better eventually. Take it from someone who's gone through a lot of crap in their life and came out on the other end of it.

Hang in there and I wish you the best of luck. :)



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04 Aug 2008, 9:18 pm

chocoholic wrote:
You said you want to be perfect like us at WP. Well, nobody here, or anyone for that matter, is perfect. As my mom would say to me when I get into perfectionistic moods, if we were perfect, we'd be God. :wink: So rather than trying to be perfect, just do the best you can, as that's all anyone can ask of you. People who ask any more than that or make you feel that your best isn't good enough should be ignored.


I was going to say something similar. None of us on WP, or any other site, or even any NT, are perfect. I may have delusions of being perfect myself but I know they are just that. It's just one of my ways of maintaining a positive attitude.

We all have things in our lives we can't stand. All we can do is make the best of what we have and strive for a better future.


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FireMinstrel
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04 Aug 2008, 9:57 pm

You're old enough to get a job. Start there and see how it works out. If you're lucky, you can make enough to move out.



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04 Aug 2008, 10:13 pm

I'm 50, and still have meltdowns, if that's any consolation ...


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gbollard
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05 Aug 2008, 12:16 am

I still have meltdowns.

Also - what makes you think we're perfect? The grass always looks greener on the other side.

We're not perfect but some of the older people here, myself included no longer care what other people think. That's the real difference.



05 Aug 2008, 1:56 am

I don't think I've had a meltdown in awhile. I get irritated at work sometimes when I get all the interruptions and they don't let me do my tasks in my own way and the damn room attendants couldn't wait for me to come and flip or turn those damn mattresses. I feel like screaming "let me work at my own pace, I will get there." But I think we're done with the mattresses now. I wasn't given a list of rooms to do them in on Sunday.


Plus I am not perfect either. No one is.



Chaotica
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05 Aug 2008, 9:13 am

Social_Fantom wrote:

None of us on WP, or any other site, or even any NT, are perfect. I may have delusions of being perfect myself but I know they are just that. It's just one of my ways of maintaining a positive attitude.

We all have things in our lives we can't stand. All we can do is make the best of what we have and strive for a better future.


I'd like to add that I've met NT's who were VERY IMPERFECT! Much more imperfect than any Aspie I've met here (judging by posts). So don't fix on this. Even deadlocks have a way out. You can aspire to the perfection yourself, I'm sure.



svend_sved
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05 Aug 2008, 4:24 pm

Perfection dosnt exist. Try to make the best out of the situation, and always believe in yourself.

emotional stuff aside, i think you should confront your parents. tell them that whipping you dosnt encourage you, but rather the other way around. its like an animal. if you whip a cat or dog, it will get scared, and wont nessecarily stop the bad behaviour.



Prof_Pretorius
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05 Aug 2008, 6:18 pm

She hasn't posted back here, but at least she's prowling the site ...


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gsilver
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09 Aug 2008, 9:24 pm

Move away from your parents, as quickly as you can, and spend as little time as possible there until you do.

Go to college (community college with loans, if you have to), get a job, hike after school, basically anything to get you out of their house.


I'm speaking from personal experience here. I didn't start growing as a person until I moved out... at age 25 (er... a few months before turning 25). More than anything else, my parents (mom especially) and their **** held me back.



UndercoverAlien
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14 Aug 2008, 9:45 am

there's no such thing as autism with an easy life



ChristinaCSB
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14 Aug 2008, 4:34 pm

I understand how you feel, I'm 23 and I have meltdowns. I think you are being way to hard on yourself. It's good that you are venting here, but you shouldn't end you life, there is too much good out there for you to just throw it all away. So what if you are autistic? I am too, I hope I deserve to live, you do too. I always feel like I should be perfect but I am not and I never will be. You will never be happy if you compare yourself to others and expect perfection from yourself. I know it doesn't get easier overnight but just give life and yourself a chance and a break, you deserve better from yourself.