Am I really this big of a loser?

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Well, I have an appointment tomorrow with my former supervisor. I'm going back to my old job since I need something in addition to my free-lance writing to pay my bills. The thing is the job is at.......Taco Bell.

I've been looking for a job for six months and haven't had any luck at all. I write articles for an African-American newspaper but pay is per article since it's free-lance work. I've avoided Taco Bell like the plague since I left six years ago because to me, it would mean a huge step backwards going back. Even still, I was shamed by others as for some reason, if you work at any fast food place, you're seen as a loser. My sister, when I was still working there, once made the comment, "My daddy (my mother's ex-husband) told me never to end up working at a job like that." In other words, don't turn out like your big sister.

Others, including customers, assumed I must not be that intelligent and made disparaging remarks to my face. It didn't matter I was going to university at the same time, working my butt off. Working at Taco Bell automatically made me a failure. Now that I really have no choice since I need more money coming in, no matter where it's from, my family.....and the rest of society, is going to see me as the ultimate loser because I have a degree yet can't get a job other than Taco Bell. Oh, and forget about finding a husband. Once any man hears "Taco Bell", they run like hell.

I don't know if it's the economy, the limited amount of good-paying jobs here or that everytime I get one, it either goes out of business or it's so stressful I can't stay for long. But I feel I should be further along than this and I see others my age with cars, owning homes and doing better financially, even though some don't have high school diplomas much less college degrees. I'm happy I'm getting better as far as my depression by staying on my meds. I'm finally getting my work published after all this time but I'm so scared future employers will ignore that and focus on me being at a fast food place, locking me out of better jobs.

Is there something fundamentally defective about me? I don't tell people I have AS but they know somethings wrong but if I tell them outright to explain my demeanor, they'll throw my resume in the garbage and won't give me a second thought. Am I really so effed up and mentally ill people can just see through any facade I hold up and not want me in spite of my abilities?

Well, it's basically the usual workplace discrimination most people with disabilities experience. I don't see anything wrong with being at Taco Bell, or why that would put prospective suitors off, it's a job, you're not lazy obviously. Can see why you feel bad about going back though. Of all the jobs I've done, I found the food industry reasonably tolerant of unusual people. I never worked for major chains though, I was a kitchen hand working for an agency, so you work at lotsa different places, three days here, four hours there, it was interesting because you work at the really big hotels as well as things like snack bars and boardroom lunches.

I can sure relate to that whole thing of seeing peers getting bigger and better accomodation/cars/travel, while I, as a single with low/unpredictable employment prospects stayed at a subsistence level.

I think I sort of know how you feel-for the first year and a half of college, I kept the same job I'd had in high school, at a fast-food restaurant, because I felt comfortable there and was afraid I wouldn't be able to do anything else, plus they were really good about giving me time off whenever I asked for it, and it made me feel like a loser at times. For the last six months I was there, my manager's started treating me like crap and talking down to me and doing things like giving me instructions on tasks that were really simple-I think they assumed I wasn't very intelligent either. Then they started writing me up for things that weren't really my fault. After the second write up slip, I knew they were going to be looking for any excuse to give me another slip and get me fired, so I quit before they could. It really confused me since I had been there for four years and thought I had been doing an ok job, and made me feel like sh*t. I'll probably take another fast-food job to get me through school, as much as I don't want to, because I'm not sure what other kind of job I can get. I think it's awful that people look down on it, it's hard work and it's something our fast-food loving culture takes for granted. I also think it's elitist and stupid to look down on people who work what are considered menial jobs and/or have intellectual disabilities, because those jobs are just as important as any other job, and no one can help the way their brain is wired. It's not you with the problem, it's the people who would look down on you. By the way, I think it's awesome that you are a freelance writer. I have always wanted to be a writer and am majoring in English, but I'm afraid I will be too scared and intimidated to try freelance writing. I really hope your future employers don't focus too much on that; hopefully they'll pay attention to your skills and education, because that's all that should really matter.

I grew up on Robert Heinlein, who survived the Depression and whose take on low-level jobs was that if you needed the money there was no shame in digging ditches, or whatever else it took. He did draw the line - almost (at times I'm sure one has to hold one's nose and just do it) at being someone's personal servant. Another inspiration was the hero of The Fountainhead, who remarked "I need customers. I don't need any one customer." Generalize that to "I need a job. I don't need any particular job."

In short, keep your options open and your head high - you're earning your own living by your own efforts, and nuts to those who think there's any job too low-status for you to do. Their attitude is why immigrants are working and Americans are on welfare (excepting of course for disability and suchlike.) Hang in there and be proud.

"The Older Generation" - probably by at least two generations and possibly three.

How does being at fast food place lock you out of better jobs?
Scenario:

Lets say you're the employer of a very well known prestigious magazine and your looking for a new editor. Who would you rather hire?

A person with your degree but who hasn't worked in months

or

A person who has the same degree but also does freelance writing while holding down a job at taco bell?I know their might be alot more variables to that scenario but you get the idea.

. In the whole scheme of things their is nothing wrong with working at taco bell. Sometimes you just gotta do what you gotta do.Don't look at taco bell as your lifelong career, just see it as a stepping stone torwards a better one, or just one of many stops on your journey called life.

And don't worry about elitist customers who look down on you and treat you like garbage; if their lives were so wonderful they wouldn'tt be taking their anger on you by looking down on you and treating you like a piece of trash now would they?

As far as how others your age are doing, do yourself a big favor and stop comparing yourself to others. Everyone's on their own individual life path.Who knows, in a few years you could have yourself a rewarding career as a prestigious writer while those same people you mentioned are now unemployed, about to lose their homes, and are dead locked in a custody battle due to divorce.

And yes I worked at mcdonalds for 4 long grueling years, so I know what the fast food industry is like and it stinks.(figruatively and literally, since the grease from those burgers and fries have a very unique disgusting smell you'll never forget.

just my .02 if it's worth anything to you.

Lots of my friends have worked in fast food outlets. Nothing much you can do but stick your back into it and kiss some low class ass. It's an ugly world out there, for sure. Just know you aren't alone. ((((((((((Nirti_rachelle)))))))))))

There is absolutely nothing wrong with working at a fast food restaurant. My guess is you only feel bad because of what other people say and think. But, hey, thats human nature to have what is considered 'cool' dictated by the majority. A majority who have never had to worry about income like you have. People who look down on those types of jobs usually are lucky enough to have the means to not have to take those jobs. Vanity is a luxary of those who can afford it. You will never find someone who is struggling to make ends meet suffering from a vanity problem. I admire you.

Justin my man you are a guy with a lot of street smarts.



That is exactly the kind of advice I need right now. I get depressed where I see my life compared to other 23 year olds. However when I think this way, I know I will do better in the long run than a lot of tradesmen who are being paid $US75,000 a year because of the housing boom and are loaded with more debt than I will when I graduate from university or even god forbid my sister who at 21 is working at a job paying $US29,000. The main reason they do not have university degrees, like I will have and in many cases not even high school diplomas which I have.