Family Issues

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Anyone here have aunts, uncles and grandparents that live really near you? Maybe about 30 min away or so? If you do have relatives that live really close to you, are you really really close to them and keep in contact? I always believed if your relatives live really close to you, that the bond is very strong and loving. But then there are parents who aren't that loving towards their own children. My parents and I live in Northern VA, and my dad's family live 4 hours away in NJ. I just feel unloved by some members of dad's family. Perhaps it's because they look down me because of my learning disability and aspergers. I'm not married, nor have children either. My dad's family have lived in NJ all their lives. My parents and I lived overseas as well being that dad was in the US Army. I do have a cousin on dad's side who is 2 years older than me. I have a uncle that is unmarried but I always believed he loves my cousin more than he loves me. No one on dad's family has learning disability or aspergers. So no problems with communication. I remember asking my uncle at age 8 if he loves my cousin more than he loves me. He said that he loves us both. That is such BS. But mom's family seems different. I have family on mom's side in Seoul Korea and in Washington State. Yet I don't feel unloved. I do feel left out from mom's family since all of my cousins on mom's side are married, have children and have great careers. I'm mixed race. Mom is Korean, and dad is white.

I suppose I was always considered as a bit of a joke, by my dads family because of my shyness and because I was so quiet and never had any friends. I was never really close to my grandmother or aunt or any of my dads family because of my restricted effect. I was close to my grandfather, but that was it.

My mom's family live in another city, so I only got a chance to see them once a year. I thought they liked me, but since I have become an adult, they seem to find my anxiety and avoidance issues something funny and "bad." They tend to be judgmental and pretty much see me as a good for nothing. Maybe, they're right. Who knows?

I wouldn't bother too much about family though, as my psychiatrist told me once, "Even if you are very successful, and drive a Maserati, family will probably still find fault in you." She's probably right.

Hang in there, I'm sure you'll find people just like you in time.

I haven't made any mistakes like my cousin has done. I won't go into that detail though, but let's just say I have good Christian morals compared to her. She is way smarter than me (finished college in 3 years, and took AP classes in high school). But I guess just because she's smarter than me doesn't mean she always makes the right choice. But my uncle (dad's youngest brother) has always loved her more than me. They do work together too, but my cousin works part time. I didn't do a thing wrong to deserve such cruelty. Ok I have aspergers and learning disability, but does that make me unloved? I read that kids with autism tend to have parents that are divorced. So sad.

I've always felt that my parents loved my worldly little sister, better than they liked me. I was the good saint who liked the 1960s, and my sister was the one, who always challenged their authority. I have a feeling that it's because I'm an aspie who has a learning disability, very much like what you're feeling. I'm also not married, and I don't have kids. My parents didn't come around, until an acquaintance admitted me to the hospital, for being obsessed with The Kinks. My mum said that if she would have been there, when that girl said that to the paramedics, that she would have killed her.