I feel like I have no soul
I feel empty all the time, no emotions or anything. It feels like I am not human. I do not know what causes this. I have been deeply isolated my whole life, as I tend to repeat. I mean I have no idea what humans do in their free time or anything. I just want a friend but I am not sure what the exact definition of friend is, and I only recently got one. How many friends does a normal person have? Is this feeling normal for aspies, especially ones who cannot write legibly or tie their shoes and lack basic motor skills?
I'm not sure if I have asperger's or not, but I know that's the way I feel all the time. I just feel as if I'm someone empy, I don't know the meaning of friendship, no one can decipher my writing except myself and a few teachers, and I have lots of trouble. I just feel as if I'm not where I belong, and , my parents are usually reminding me about this, which doesn't help at all. I just wish I could get a diagnosis, or at least know why I'm the way I am.
Mutt, a diagnosis won't give you answers that you don't already have.
It'll only put a name on something, without changing it.
Baratos and Mutt, I feel much the same, and I'm well over 30... and I've felt that way all my life.
On the flip side, i do not believe i have a "soul" per se. A soul kinda implies something beyond the physical. I instead believe we have something that is more than our understanding of the physical.
When you're feeling like you're empty, think about what you can do. Think about what you can CHOOSE to do.
Ask yourself if it really is that you don't have emotions, or just don't understand them?
Maybe like me, you can derive emotions from OTHER things.
What do you enjoy doing? How do you feel when you are doing those things? I know (well, suspect given what you wrote) that you don't feel emotions when things happen that cause OTHER (normal?) people to feel emotions.
When your father hugs your mother, you see her face brighten....
But when someone hugs you, you don't feel what you suspect your mother feels in that same situation.
Look for "emotions" from other sources.
What is a friend?
Interesting question... But i think the answer is relative to the people involved.
A friend can be more or less, depending on what the two need out of the "friendship"
You have to have some common ground, you have to have some ability to share with each other, and I believe that you both have to have something to offer the other that the other needs. Even if that might sometimes just be a sympathetic ear... Mind you don't ask me to define what a sympathetic ear is.. I honestly don't know. I can listen to someone's problem, and apply reason and rational thought to it... but i can't help them find the answer that will make them "feel" better though.... If i COULD do that.. i'd likely feel a lot better myself.
Just remember this.. you're NOT empty, you just contain different stuff than the rest of people.
There is no liver in a box of chocolates. The box isn't empty though... And i'll take the box of chocolates over the pack of liver.
It's funny you know... here I am "trying" to give advice on a question that has so much to do with a thread I just started, and was likely writing when you posted this.
Ask yourself this question... Do you want a friend, or have you been convinced by others that you need a friend?
There also lies a middle ground there too... you may "need" a friend, but not "want" one.
As for how many friends a "normal" person has, I really don't know myself, I have very few... arguably only 2.
I don't WANT more... Even if i do need more. Resource-wise, they're too costly... and to find more would be irrational.
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