I wasn't just bullied- I was sexually harrassed

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We probably all have been bullied somewhere in life. I know I have. I told a counselor about my experience when I was 14 going on 15. Basically, this sophomore football player singled me out for no apparent reason and kept screwing with me. One day I stood up to him, but backed down when I knew he was about to get violent. He started spreading a rumor that I was homosexual around the school. Everybody in that horrible class jumped on it. It became a running gag. I told the assistant principal, and the bully was called in. I guess he stopped, but it spread like wild fire. In retrospect, that was more than bullying- it was sexual harassment. And he probably should have been expelled.

That does not sound like sexual harassment to me.

Some people get pissed when you stand up for yourself to them so they get back at you for it. I think it has to do with power bullies want over you.

You should have said yeah I am gay this continued harrassment is discrimination do something about or I will sue or talk to the media about it. They already believe your gay no matter how much you say you are not they will still say your gay. So you might as well flip it on them making them seem like biggots than bullies.

I was also harassed like that in school. The guys in my PE class thought I was gay cuz they would ask me questions & I would give em answers that I didn't really understand trying to fit-in or sound kewl but didn't work. They also noticed that I shaved certain "parts" for hygienic rezones. Some of the guys wer afraid to change in the locker room with me I've been kind of confused about sexuality & I don't really conform to any label. Not sure if it could be related to the bullying somehow. I haven't really talked to a psych/counselor about it thou. The ones I saw did not understand me. They diagnosed me as having things I probably didn't have & they pushed meds that I should not of been on. I find I'm better off dealing with things myself or talking about it online with people who understand instead.

I was touched inappropriately by females in high school (the opposite of men groping females, and touching their breasts and buttocks against their will). I didn't know what to do at the time, as my father told me when little to never hit girls, so I never hit them, and I was unable to respond verbally or tell on them (autism).

I hated that they did such, especially when I left/escaped and went over all of the blah that happened to me.

Past is the past, I guess.

I seriously don't understand why people think hitting girls is any worse than hitting boys. I'm just as likely to hit a girl as I am to hit a boy, if I'm provoked enough.

As for the OP, you should have sued them.

Last edited by Asp-Z on 23 Jun 2010, 7:07 am, edited 2 times in total.

This kind of reaction is both sexist and highly offensive. The notion that females can be sexually harassed but males either cannot be or shouldn't complain about it - presumably based on some idea that all males enjoy being groped because they're no more than base sexual creatures - is damaging and is why so many males are reluctant to come forward with abuse. The act itself can be just as painful and abusive when a female does it to a male as when a male does it to a female. The only difference is that a female will be sympathized with and supported, while a male will have to face foolish and mocking reactions.

You should be ashamed of yourself. He shared a personal story of sexual harassment, and your idea of support was to laugh and imply that he should be happy about it. That's sick.

Woah, I just tried to make a little joke, and most jokes are a play on stereotypes and generalisations. I didn't mean to offend anyone. Sorry if I did.

Last edited by Asp-Z on 23 Jun 2010, 7:07 am, edited 1 time in total.

Hey, thanks, RainSong.

You put the feelings I saw into words for me (I was having trouble forming what you just said).

Hey, check that out, I even have trouble with unwritten social rules on an Aspie forum

It is not something to joke about, especially when it's such a highly personal issue that can cause so much pain. The perpetuation of pretending males have little to nothing to complain about when they are abused is never ok whether you mean it as a joke or not. Honestly, it doesn't matter what your intention was, because it was flat out wrong and offensive, and I'm sure you wouldn't have done it if a female was complaining about males touching her inappropriately when she couldn't respond. It's never funny, and it's not ok in the slightest.

That's not a social rule, that's common decency. You don't mock those who are sharing personal stories of abuse that caused them pain.

I'd actually class that as a social rule, since it would assume I had to show empathy and it dictates what is appropriate in a social situation.

How come I'm getting attacked for not showing empathy on a forum created specifically for people with the condition that causes that problem, even after I explained that it was only a joke and have even apologised for any offense I caused?

Daniel's post quite clearly states that he hated it. It doesn't take any special empathetic abilities to understand that the words "I hated that they did such" indicates that this was an experience that caused pain, and, as such, probably shouldn't be joked about.

Oh I give up.

If you lot think it was really that bad, fine, I've wiped it off my post, and you can wipe the quotes off of yours if you want, too.