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i have been having a hard time lately. i find it difficult to face anything in life. I feeli have given up and feel compleatly powerless and hopless. i feel sad and i feel lazy and i feel i am taking liberties with thoes around me and i feel i make life hard for thoes around me.

everything is difficult , being awake is hard, sleeping is hard, doign my streches for my bad back are hard, puttign my foot cream on my feet is hard. watching tv is sad, i miss my bf but i get stressed trying to find the right time to talk to him cause i often dont sleep.

I find living hard but i dont want to die. its a terrable state i am in. the good news is i havent self harmed in a while.

my current problem is i dont like sleeping cause i am always cold. i cant stand the feelign of my sheets cause they keep light tuchign me.
i am super sensitive to any hair or crumb on my bed so i have to grt up adn dust it off over and over.

I often dont want to sleep cause i feel there aren't enough hours in the day to do what needs doing. by the time i am done with my stretches and feet i am so stressed out that i cant enjoy talking with my bf. and then when he goes offline i am sad he is gone and so i sit there sad and discontent with life.


Ive lost my will. my will to participate in life. but i must participate or die And i dont want to die so i am stuck being dragged through the muddy everyday stresses that life throws at me. all of which i am completely unable to cope with.

Ive cut myself off from all my friends cause it is to stressful to talk. i stay in my room and hardly see my family.

i cant possibly have any eazyer life . but i still cant cope.

its like the will to live left me when my mom almost dies last Christmas. and it is here 6 months later i am only just starting to feel anythign at all. and i feel dead. like a ghost trapped in a house unable to interact with the world around me. complealty lost in sorrow and without any hope at all/

I have no hope for the future and i see no point in anything.

life being alive is so stressful. and yet it is better then death.

so i am such between worlds a hungry ghost longing for something to feel better but not knowing what it is or how to get it.

its not the sadness that bothers me it is this dead hopelessness this endless exhaustion i feel being so stressed out that i feel like i am being dragged by a car through the mud.

have you been here before ? what do i need how do i fix this?

i may not have the will to respond so please dont be offended if i dont. i do want to know though.

Ive been many dark paths before but nothing like this. Ive gone insane Ive tried to kill myself. but i have never felt dead before.

i am not suicidal. i am constantly scared and going to the doctors to see if i am ok. i worry about my bad back the mole i have that i need checked out,

i was worried when they said my liver was large ( its ok btw) ..

im just so hopeless.

bad things kept happening so i guess it wore the life out of me. now i am the living dead.

I have felt as you have - what got me through is my dog Quincy. The fact that he needs me to feed him, house him, take care of him physically and emotionally is how I've coped.

I wish you peace.

Having a pet is a great answer - but with pets is the stress of looking after them and accounting for them at all times.

The first thing I would recommend is being comfortable in the place you're living. If sheets bother you, don't use them. I don't use them I find them annoying - Just have one on the base of your bed and then a heavy cover or duvet. Best not to eat in bed either that way you can avoid crumbs.

I am one who gets depressed when its untidy, so keeping things simple to look at is a good idea. Put clutter out of sight. If you have windows, let the sun in as often as possible

If you get tired easily, its probably an energy thing -and because you aren't getting sleep. The first thing you need to do is make your bed comfortable enough so you can sleep.

Hopefully when that is sorted you can concentrate on fixing things in other ways

You just moved to your own place didn't you? That's a big change and change equals stress and for many stress is a major trigger for depression. You might need a temporary meds adjustment, if you take meds.

I guess I´ve been through that. When I was depressed it seemed that my touch sensitivity all of the sudden got worse. It is very hard to take a shower and then put the clothes on, and even though it is winter now I´m wearing shorts and a t-shirt because they are more comfortable. You should find a comfortable way to sleep. Do you go to therapy? My psychologist says that you recover from bad moments in your life by doing activities that you like and have meaning for you and also by talking about your problems. A psychologist can help you find those actvities that have some meaning for you. Also when the times are bad we lost the perspective of things and feel that we are not going to get better again but that is not true. My psychiatrist always reassures me of that.

I went through the same feelings, after I've just moved into my apartment, in 2006. I was depressed all through the month of December, and than I feel off my rocker, when a friendship ended with another member, here and that's what the spiked green hair, was about. I became happier, that spring of 2007. There's no use, looking back. The old, fun CockneyRebel is back, and that's all that matters...this time, without those unneeded glasses! I did go through a bit of a grey area, though and I got over it, in time for the spring of 2007.

I haven't moved yet cause they said the place i am moving wont be ready until December. I'm still at home. I'm just sad and overwhelmed still from almost losing my mom.

I saw terrible thing when she was in hospital for that month.

Things get better in life.

I promise. keep going ahead. My father died last year unexpectedly, but his words guide me in the wierdest ways.
When you sleep. You go to a place where everything is possible.
and In life, who is to say it isnt possible?
go for it. Make a happy future with your imagination and your hands

I am having guilt about being usless and unable to help my family. i am a burden on them and i feel guilty about that. but i truly an unable to do much without being so stress out to the point of wanting to self harm. so i simply cant do much.

I know its not my fault but i still feel guilty for being such a burden on them. they have no money, are losing there home and lost all there life savings. so you see why i feel so bad for adding another thing to the list.

on top of that my mom is still recovering from best cancer. but lucky it ended up saving her life. they found an un-ruptured anurism in her brain. now they know that can operate on it and it wont kill her. so the cancer saved her life. i knew god gave her cancer for a good reason. god does everything out of love.

I know this is all out of love. i just cant see the reasons yet. I still feel guilty for having to slow down, take time for myself, and stop helping my family. but i must for my mental health. and i know its what i need to do.

my family are ok with this. they are really working with me lately. i just feel so bad for not helping. but i do appreciate there efforts.