My struggles and sucesses with multiple disablities

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Starting in my early childhood, I was put into the Special Education program at the age of three due to having multiple disabilities (mild stroke and autism). I had a hard time talking and walking during my age because all I could do is point and crawl during that time. I didn't learn how to walk until I was three years old and I didn't learn how to talk until I was four. At the time, I didn't even think about my classmates being classified as "ret*d" people as I played with them just anyone would do in certain situation. Although I am one of the most popular kids in Special Ed, the mainstream kids thought otherwise because they thought I was "ret*d", but nothing is further from the truth. The kids would make fun of me and called me "fat kid", Alien Nation (because of my oversized head), and the kids would put me on the wall. It wasn't very fun for me in grade school and getting picked severely on because of the situation that I have no control over and I didn't have a choice at the time.

When I first entered middle school, just like grade school, I struggled with adjusting to new things and I had run-ins with bullies and troublemakers (both regular and special ed classmates). I didn't know what to do at the time so I go to library and look up books about things I still love to this day: football, movies, music, and all sorts of entertainment. It wasn't until I was in seventh grade that mainstream kids finally accepted me thanks to my middle school TV appearance about my knowledge of Pro Football trivia (from 1960 to present). From being the laughing stock of the school to being the most respected, I get questions from other kids of who won Super Bowls in 1985, 1989, or last year's game. At this point, I felt like I could walk on water. From 1995 to 1997, these were basically the happiest moments of my life.

In high school, unlike grade school and middle school, I started out floating on air with happiness thinking I could take over the world, but it was crashed to a halt when I started to make the most unrealistic goal in the history of my life. I ran for ASB president twice and lost twice in landslides. I wanted to be the coolest ASB president that ever lived but as it turns out the only people that voted for me were in Special Ed classes. I went from sitting in the popular freshmen table on the first day of high school to sitting with the Special Ed kids for the rest of the year. I wasn't the lonely kid (thank god), however, it could have been better for me had I not acted so cocky. During my junior and senior year, I wanted break free from my peers (Lindsay Weir in reverse to be exact) and hang out with the bad kids, the "freaks" if you must (some were in Special Ed and others in mainstream). I did for awhile until it got way out of hand. My high school/teenage era ended poorly as I was told that I am going to CBTC to finish out high school until I was 21. I was furious because that meant I have to be with Special Ed kids that I try to avoid for four years including the Mariner (my rival school since I went to Kamiak) kids that apparently were too smart to stay at the S.A.I.L. program. I usually had a grade point average of at least 3.6 and Edmonds Community College bound.

So I relunctly went to the 18-21 program and stayed there until I got my high school diploma at the age of 21. I had problems with my main teacher Suzanne Patton because she thought I don't fit in her program and thought I was a social outcast (which I was, but she blew it up to the point that she thought I was a higher functioning version of Rain Man). Needless to say, she didn't care about much what I did in middle school and high school, therefore, all she really cared about is the negative stuff I did. So she was relieved from her duties in 2002, and was replaced by my high school job coach named Eileen Jowell. I always liked her and she was the same way with me even though she doesn't think I really have mild autism. I always thought she was cool because she was basically the cool teacher I was always dreamed of (like my fourth grade and middle school teacher Marsha Reeve). We both like the same type of music and movies. Just like Patton, she lasted one year with me. In final year of that forgettable era, despite the fact that I only been in the program for three-four days, I was named student of the year in 2004. This would’ve been an honor if I was in middle school and high school. I didn't really deserve that award as I was basically out of the program when I turned 20 although I was on the roster until 21.

The employment I work for at Safeway was more or less a success (I'm still working there after nine years going on ten), but I have been a courtesy clerk mostly although I lost my love for that job a long time ago. I was unhappy with that job that I was sent to clean-up the meat dept. which at first I was awesome and then it got tedious and boring after five months. After my struggles with that job, I was sent back up front where I really don't belong. It has it's advantages to be sure like I get dental plan, W2, 401K plan, and other essential stuff I needed, but it has it's disadvantages like working with minimum wage, customers I can't stand, and other co-workers that think they're holier than thou. I'm still looking for the big break at the store so I won't have to bag groceries until I'm 65 years old! God help me!

My freedom of education started at Edmonds Community College where I am trying to pursue a AA degree in General Education (because there's no degree in acting and other creative endeavors that are my niche). This is where my love of acting really began was there because Joanna Goff is the head of drama over at the college. She said to me that I am one of her favorite students and my love for acting has really made her proud. I did get a part in a school play called Taming of the Shrew (still my only role in this day) as one of the slaves Joseph. I was great in classes that didn't matter but wished it did like music history, U.S. history, World history, and gym classes. I was pretty good in English (but usually in my second tries). The one subject I can't stand for the life of me is Math. I always hated math from the very beginning. I think they ought to change the school policies for math because not everybody's going to be the next Albert Einstein. I just couldn't take college anymore (so far) so right now I'm taking a long break.

Here's the most exciting paragraph of the blog, my non-existent yet very eager, love life. Remember on one my statuses that I am NOT looking for a perfect 10, cheerleader, prom queen, or any women that I won't ever meet in real life let alone go out with, but rather just a 5-8 would be perfect for me, well it still hasn't happened. It doesn't mean that I'm going to quit trying to pursue it though no matter how many people think that's sexist and crazy. I'm just being honest here. I have been on dates at least six times and I had two girlfriends (both are disabled, but different types of disabled) which did not work out for me. I'm not going to mention their names because I don't want to sound like an embittered jerk. Before I had girlfriends, I had crushes (both people I actually knew and celebrities). My real life crushes were my 4th grade teacher because we both liked sports and she's a brunette (even though I have dirt blond hair, I still consider brunettes more attractive than blondes and redheads), Jaclyn my middle school classmate (because we like the same things and she's the daughter of my P.E. teacher), and my job coach and CBTC teacher Elieen Jowell (the only blonde I truly liked other than my family members). I'm still looking for my own special lady who's like a mix of Linda Cardellini (Whom I still like since I first discovered her on the highly underrated nostalgic TV teen show "Freaks and Geeks" during my junior year in high school) and Jenna Fischer (I just love her personality as she seems like a type of woman that would go to karaoke bars with me to sing plus she was awesome on "The Office"), but only more exotic (think different ethnics like Greek, Italian, Spanish, Armenian, Albanian, etc.). Despite the fact that I'm Scandinavian-French-Canadian blooded American, I want my next girlfriend to be exotic, beautiful, full of personality, and of course intelligent.

I enjoyed reading your post, and I hope all works out well for you.

Just this morning I read an article about a company cross-training its employees, and something like that can be very beneficial all around. If possible, volunteer to learn to fill in for others in different positions whenever needed. You would be relieved of things always being mundane, and your employer might eventually reward your versatility.