My sister's kids were kidnapped.

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I can't seem to get grips with myself and am having trouble putting my thoughts into organizing words. I'm so upset and both my dad and me feel angry enough to kill this SOB more than ever now. He has all the town on his side.

It all started when my sister and him were separated due to his drinking and not working. He even stole cash that was suppose to be for my nephew's medication for alcohol saying he'd pay back...which he never did. The man's done nothing but put our whole family through s**t and my sister tried so hard to be patient with him. She even wanted him and her to see both a marriage councelor and a support group for his drinking. He never went and things just got worse from there. He said he wanted to take the kids to see his family in Ohio on June. Up until July he finally told my sister that he was keeping this children.

I can't even go into it I'm so f*****g mad!! Goddamit he never once took care of those kids and did nothing to contribute in the household. He's got everyone in that town on HIS side. My sister did not abandon her kids she LET them go with him to see his family. She had tried EVERY thing to help this guy and we did too. I don't know what else to say but that this whole experience has changed and challenged my perspective of things.

Sorry you and your family have to go through this. A similar thing happened with my siblings about ten years ago when my mom and then step-father separated. Authorities told us nothing could done because neither parent had custody. What we ended up doing was, frankly, "stealing" them back. My sister, then 8 would sneak and call us, telling us how badly she wanted to come home. So we loaded up the minivan with family and friends, went up to the home, and when the kids were outside, they made a run for it. We scooped them up and drove off. It's not something I'd ordinarily recommend, but it proved best for their safety, even more so then we knew at the time.

I very much hope this is worked out for your family as soon as possible. It's a very hard thing to have to go through.

I'm sorry, I know this has to be gut wrenching for your entire family. I hope your sister uses everything within her power to get those children back. Someone suggested to me that I go and make sure I had sole custody (my son's father is absent and seems to have little interest) so just such a thing wouldn't happen. The only way I could see it is if there was another female encouraging him for whatever reason. Is he allowing phone contact between your sister and the kids? Has your sister contacted the police? Why does he have the whole town on his side? Has he been spreading lies about your sister's competence?

OMG that sucks. I'm so sorry. I wish you and your family strength and hope in dealing with this situation.

~Kate

Has this been brought to a lawyer/family court? Has custody been legally determined since their separation? If not so, then it should be done ASAP or else the other guy will do it first in Ohio. A parental kidnapping charge can be filed with the police against him. If your sister feels that her children are in danger from this person because of drinking, that needs to made clear to the police.

I'm sorry you're feeling so upset about this Alice, and I understand how this is making you angry. I hope this works out for the best somehow.

I am so, so sorry to hear that! I know you don't believe in God, but I do, so I will say a prayer on your behalf.

Call the police! Seriously, even though he's the dad, it's still kidnapping if they were in your sister's custody (even shared custody).

Exactly, call the cops ASAP and tell them so, they will contact the cops from ohio and track the guy down wereever he is to get the kids.

This is exactly what's happening here. Those kids, my oldest niece is trying to call her mother but his family won't let her. His mother is the one that's taking care of the children not him. The whole family has supposedly bought into this bs that my sister abandon her kids. That's bullcrap! She let them go with him to see his family for the summer because she felt that it was fair for them to be connected with her father. Trouble is the relationship was already in cahoots yet the mistake on my sister's part was not getting a divorce which is why the police are hesitant to get involved.

I hope she gets them back soon.

Yes it has and yes we called the cops. I think our biggest mistake was not calling the right away as you pointed out and that my sister never signed the divorced papers right away!! She also let those kids go with him even though countless times he threatened to take them away from her. So there are things my sister could have done but this doesn't even compare of what he did to her. He has a family that's been financially supporting his ass from the get go while my sister has been working 2 jobs. He'll take the kids on outings but often would leave my mom to do most of the babysitting. I and my granny also use to help out but now that my granny is gone it makes things tougher. But what makes this worse is he's been telling LIES to his family about my sister not being there for them and having a lot of relationships on the side including a lesbian one. All of it is pure BS! My sister has never been in a relationship even her friends know this. And talk about hypocricy, he got in a relationship with 2 women and as I said has never worked or ever taken care of those kids unless they wanted to go to the park or an outing and while he hasn't been working so it isn't as if he had better things to do except hang out with his beerfest.

I don't know if I can even get into this discussion about the f*****g lawyer and judge. My dad has been persistent as he's been by trying to get these a**holes to sign and turn over the DFS and other papers regarding restraining orders and divorce papers. They kept telling us that that's all we needed and they would turn them over to Ohio. For one excuse after another they weren't able to and frankly the whole situation is complicated. My dad and her finally went to ohio to visit the kids because we thought he got the papers. Nope and the way my dad described it, it was a very small town and that bastard has everyone convinced by his stories. My sister wasn't allowed to see her oldest and he told her that she wasn't here, then the youngest ones said she was in the backyard with some other guys. His sister was a real a**hole. She wouldn't allow her to hug her kids for fear of them being taken away. She was on the ground crying and the way my dad put it, he stood there cold and smug. His family compared to ours lives better off than us. If we weren't so down on luck with our financial problems, we'd be able to hire another attorney.


I'm sorry guys if I'm not making any sense. My emotions overcome me that it's hard for me to put my words in a clear order. It would be great to hear more input if there is anything more I could do with this situation. I know not so many people on this board live in Missouri or know how the system works. I've never dealt with this crap myself.

@bluebandit thankyou for sharing your story. I just find the beaurocratic system so hard to understand and very unfair. It seems the more money you have the more justice is on your side.

Again I apologize if I'm not making much sense. I was hesitant to respond back without coming off like a flaming b***h. I'm just so mad and I was very close to those kids. Both my nieces' birthdays are coming up in late september and early october. This will be the first time we havena't gotten a chance to celebrate them. I'm crying so hard right now and my sis tells us they miss us. They now know they've been kidnapped after my dad screamed it out to them. Now everytime they go on the phone, her oldest daughter tells her she knows and that she misses us.

In Canada, once a statement of claim for divorce is filed by the plaintiff, the other side has 15 days to file a statement of defence or be NOTED IN DEFAULT, which means if that happens, the plaintiff gets whatever they ask for, including custody. If this happened in Canada, HE WOULD BE SITTING IN A REMAND CENTRE AWAITING KIDNAPPING CHARGES RIGHT NOW>

While I know the grass isn't always greener I really wish I could move there for many reasons off subject. They have not done their job like they were suppose to and I'm not trying to bash the judge and lawyer but I feel like we've been lied to. It's been A LOT of work on our part. Things that should've or could've been done but all in all they were kidnapped and she doesn't get to be with them. Where is the right in this? This guy has a criminal record and no job but my sister has worked her butt off and yes living in a place that's not big and pretty but she's doing the best she can goddamit!

Yes, the system is definitely unfair. I forgot mention earlier, but our situation happened in Ohio as well(and was also completely orchestrated their grandmother). Basically, what we learned is; the same rules or lack thereof apply to both parties. Without saying too much, I'd recommend being just as sneaky/dishonest in getting the kids as he was in taking them.

My thoughts and prayers are with you.

He probably went around lying behind her back the whole time just in case something like this ever happened. Poor sister! Just because the two are not divorced doesn't give HIM the right to take the children. Is there any proof of his alcohol abuse? Maybe facebook??