I will now have to see two specialists

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At my doctors appointment today, I asked him about seeing someone. He recommended I see a psychologist and psychiatrist. I surely can't be in that bad of a state can I?

That's for those people to find out

If I am to be institutionalized in the future, I will continue my writing, maybe captivate the other patients with my tales. They'll need a hero they all can relate to.

General Creedon is my hero.

I have had bad luck with both kind of these so called "professionals"

That seems typical. A psychiatrist to handle medication management and a psychologist for therapy. That's actual standard practice for a lot of things. What are you being treated for? What kind of doctor where you originally seeing?

I think I have schizophrenia. The doctor I saw yesterday was my physician.

The reason I said I think, is because I have been hearing things and seeing things. I don't want to rule anything out. I'm ashamed I told my doctor about my 50 suicide plans and attempting to do a few of them. One such plan was to have myself drowned in the Missouri River, another was to go to a local wildlife preserve and hang myself. A lot of people don't realize how much of my mind is in a truly sorry state.

You shouldn't be ashamed of telling your doctor. You did the right thing by telling him. If you're suicidal, you're supposed to talk to someone about it.

Ackman I am sorry for being harsh in my last post to you in the "Creedonia is dead" thread. I hope you get help and I hope your suicidal thoughts are not due to rejection of your art. I was rejected from something about a month ago that pertained to my interest - I wanted to go to a battlefield study tour in France that related to World War One and Two battlefields but was rejected because my marks didn't make the cut - and I was stung by that badly but I still haven't lost my interest in military history. Rejection is hard but you should not allow that to dissuade you from pursuing something great. I hope you find peace and deal with what ever issues you are facing.

It could be possible. Do you think you have schizophrenia? I do think it would be a good idea to be to be evaluated for it. From what I have read, people who have this problem describe it as their imaginations take over themselves and they have a hard time distinguishing between reality and imagination. Then their imagination becomes out-of-control.
How real is "Creedonia" for you. Is it a great work of art (fiction) or is it a little too real?
Good luck!

It's been getting more real as the days go by. All I want to do is come home.

I hope that things work out for you and I'm on your side, no matter what happens.

Scary, I am glad you have the insight to get help.
There are effective medications for these sorts of things.
Good Luck to you!

Oh, man.

I'm sorry to hear that Ackman. I had 3 relatives with this.

At least you are aware; my family had it bad to where they didn't understand it.

Hope it goes well.

The real me has insight. None of my altered states do, because THEY don't want me to get help. They'd rather have me live in this land that really isn't so much fun anymore. Sure, the Creedonian subcontinent is fascinating, but the general is taking too much of me.

I really hope that you go see your doctors, even if your altered states don't want you to.
It would probably take a lot of courage but I think you can do it.
Please post back here afterwards.
People (at least me) really want to know what you think.

+1