Wanting something, but not knowing what it is

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Does anybody else ever feel like they really want to be with other people in a certain manner, but after reaching that opportunity suddenly found that you didn't know what to do afterwards?

One example of what I mean is when you're around a group, and you feel like you want to be apart of the conversation, but when someone in the group adresses you, you find you don't actually know what to say, or you say something and it is overly negative or something.

I ask because I've experienced the situation above many times, and recently had problems with this:
I was feeling overwhelmed and worked up the courage to ask someone I hoped I could trust if they knew much about depression. I didn't want to just wallow in self pity and force that person to listen to it, but actually wanted help of some kind. Thing is, when I tried to describe what was ailing me, it generally came out as a jumbled, convaluted mess. I found I could understand my problems for the most part, but could never get them out without vying for pity. I became sort of distraught with this, and stopped trying to talk to this person because I knew it wasn't going anywhere (I've since gotten over most of my problems though).

For me, my own emotions can feel a little nebulous and hard to define sometimes. Very obvious ones, like suddenly getting angry if someone cuts me off while I'm driving, for example, are easy, but with ones that run a bit deeper and have subtle nuances or shades of gray, it's a bit more difficult. And, it seems like if I don't get a handle on these more subtle ones, they'll gradually build and hit me like a ton of bricks later, which often isn't pretty, lol.

I've kept a journal for years and have found that if I write in it just once a week or so, then periodically look back at the entries, it's a good way for me to look at my own patterns and better identify what exactly it is that I'm dealing with internally. Maybe you could try journaling or using some other creative outlet you are comfortable with to do some periodic self-exploration and gain a more solid understanding of what you are feeling? Then, when you try to share it with others, you'll be better able to explain it and less likely to be overwhelmed? I think it could be easier to reach out for support when you understand and can clearly define exactly what you need from someone.