Not sure, but spontaneously this week, I've had no patience.

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Kept on back talking to the other student I volunteer with in my lab. (under my breath venting; did not go noticed). The other volunteer did not deserve this from me.

I work with mice in my lab, since I handle them better than the other volunteer; who is still scared by them after 1 year. However I even lost patience with them, and felt really bad after throwing reacting to a bite by smacking the mouse out of my hand. (I can usually tolerate a bite and gently put them down).

I binge ate 3 times this week. Today I ate a Lox and bagel; and I feel like horrible. 2-3 hour long constricting feeling at the throat whilst making many small burps; what is that called?

I noticed all this when thinking about my yesterday just now; since I had a meltdown of sorts.
Yesterday, I was going to go my martial arts class at 8pm, but my father asked me to follow him in another car to a 6:30pm fundraiser and leave mid-event to the martial arts thing. My mother refused to let me use her car, so I was going to use my sister's car. I realized I had no GPS in my sister's car. So my father said to follow him. I knew if he got ahead with one bad red light I would be lost.
I said I would go print the directions if I got the address first. They stumbled some time to give me it. They all went to the car and started waiting for my in the garage. For some reason, as I used the computer for the direction, I realized I couldn't print at my computer and would have to find someone else's computer.
I broke down here and started yelling by swearing out-loud with the F-word. I never swear ever, unless I really can't hold back if I bump my head on some corner. Of course, with everyone in the garage, nobody heard me. (hence why I was taking advantage of the luxury).
When I finally printed out the directions and got back to the garage. My family with my father was gone; so no more following, and I would have to follow these directions on my own. I went back to swearing out-loud very loudly.

Returned to my room, and was going to put back my headphones (very good audio-technica sheadphones) on. Saw my computer, and noticed nobody was home. So I blasted a shuffled music list from my computer and enjoyed my speakers that I never get to use. (okay polk-audio bookshelf speakers). And started putting my poor cat that was wondering what the heck was going on.

Ended up not attempting to drive to the fundraiser. Then went to my martial arts class when time was appropriate; and was at my best behavior the whole time. Though, I did very bad in catching up with the speed of all the other beginners in contact practicing.

Again, this rage this week is spontaneous and I cannot point at one specific reason for it. My next college semester starts tomorrow. but that has not been pinging my mind. I have been on bad terms with my mother for the last 3week, due to repeating Organic Chemistry 2 this upcoming semester. She has been expressing it by giving me the silent treatment, and will go third-person talking on me if I approach talking about 'him' or to answer by means of talking to my sister to tell 'it' so-and-so. I usually find this silent treatment as a blessing since; it is better than my mother's constant bickering complaints about me and how other people we know of my generation of already married and done with college. I find her complaints about my college very annoying since she has a high-school degree from her country. Anyways, I do not feel like the silent treatment has been stacking grief on me either to explain this past week.

Hmm....