So I can't quit stressing about the current situation.

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Ok well basically I am 21 and I still technically live at my moms house......for the past few months I have been mostly staying at a friends house, He's pretty much twice my age and used to be in the special forces of the military, he is a good friend so I don't care if people think its weird that I spend a lot of time with guy twice my age. But yes this is in the mountains of Colorado fairly close to the city of Denver where I go to college and my mom works. So yeah basically my mom got sick of the commute and is in the process of getting a new house closer to town so I will end up having to stay there a lot more often since my friend has no income just food stamps and whatever money his mom is able to spare(because our government treats people in the military so great once they've completed their service) and so he cannot afford to drive me to the bus station every morning to get down to the college.

So yeah, I have been staying at his place so much because I cannot stand being around my mom and her boyfriend for very long....and I just really don't feel like I am part of the family its like my mom, her boyfriend and my youngest brother live in their own bubble that I cannot relate to. So I guess I am worried about having to be around them more often at least until I can get a place of my own. I mean I will have my own room so that will be good.....but I a just worried about conflicts that could arise and getting sucked into them. Also I don't think my mom would approve of my lifestyle or friends I might make. This would not be an issue at all if I had a place of my own because I wont let her opinions run my life but living in her house obviously gives her the oppurtunity to try and manipulate me. Also, I am fine with not smoking cannabis in the house but I don't think I am going to go without drinking during my stay there because it will be a while before I move out and I enjoy drinking.

So yeah I just hope I can deal with all this without it interfering with college, and I hope it does not cause any regression because I really just want to get on with my life rather then feeling trapped by obligations people manipulate me into thinking are 'my' obligations. I have the mindset not to continue this cycle of being stepped on but its hard to put it into practice especially around my family.

I think a good way to not stress out about that stuff is to stay busy. Stay busy with college, stay busy with trying to find employment (if you're unemployed) and or saving up enough money so you can move out. Also whatever you do, don't wait to find employment, the job market is supposedly slightly better but its still pretty bad.

In my situation I had to pretty much fake and act a certain way around my mom because almost everyday would be an argument, fight or dispute over something.

That said, if you love your mom and she's not a bad mom (just controlling, aggravating, misguided..) she's going to have to learn to accept her daughter eventually if you continue dealing with her that is.