Something I'm very concerned about

Post Reply New Topic

I'm going to go straight to the point... I hate when people try to insist that autism is not a disability.

Some find it disabling, some don't. Autism is a spectrum and every individual is affected differently, some disabled and others not. Some are disabled until they get enough help. But what worries me is how the not-disabled push their views on people who do feel disabled by it, and the damage they could be doing. It often takes the form of telling off the person who might have expressed their feeling disabled. What good is that supposed to do?

It's hard enough to come to terms with one's difficulties, and accepting them is the first step to improvement as you're obviously not going to get help until you accept your struggles. Imagine what it's like for the person making the tough decision of accepting the need for some assistance. It is no easy choice to admit to yourself, let alone to anyone else, that you're not coping. And then imagine that person coming here to share that experience and to feel part of a community, only to have someone come along and attack them for it. How is that supposed to be productive? The only effect that could possibly have is to cause that person to take a giant step backwards and return to a state of denial of their problems, with the likely addition of guilt in having tried to accept the fact that he/she needed to get help.

I better stop now before I ramble too much. Just something I want to get off my chest!

I agree with you. Well said.

Sometimes I feel disabled, sometimes I don't. Disability is about how afflicted that particular individual is and how their condition affects their life.

Yes people just wont believe me and treat me like crap-and I believe these same people would kick the crutches out from a person that needed them to walk as they like to play mind games with me and cause me problems at work.

Some people think that all disabilities revolve around being in a wheelchair. Even the disability logo is a stylized wheelchair. But basically, people can think whatever the hell they want to think. If they are stupid or ignorant, why should I even care what stupidity comes out of their mouth? If I reply to them at all, which is rare, I tell them "What you think of me is none of my business." This statement seems to flabbergast them so they don't know what to reply and basically it makes them shut up. Try saying that to them, it's fun.

I hate it when they think that aspergers is just some "made - up disability". Just because you can't see it physically doesn't mean you can just say you're going to be alright. Aspergers does affect the way I handle things in everyday life for example making small talk, catching a peak hour train on the way home, appearing normal etc. As a result of Aspergers, some people get lonely and feel worthless/ helpless because they feel they can't make friends like the rest of the world. Sigh, I've always wanted to say that to a couple of ignorant people I know lol

I also find it infuriating when people go on about how it's not a disability but a "gift" or something, and yet they're claiming disability allowance and/or using a disabled travel pass and/or have a carer and/or are availing of disability services in school or at college and/or have had therapy all their lives to work out ways around the problems... Basically, they've got so many supports in place it's no wonder they no longer feel like their disabled. Do they even know what it is to have never had any kind of help with their issues? How can they claim that they're not disabled when they need all those services to be as "not disabled" as they feel now?

Unfortunately, part of this disability, regardless of whether society thinks you're high functioning or not, is that we cannot see other people's reality. Only our own experiences seem real and valid to us. NTs do this, too, but to a much lesser extent. We simply don't have the capability to break free, for the most part. That is debilitating.

Ya I guess that itself is part of the problem. This is the empathy problem which itself is part of being autistic. I don't have too much of an issue with this as I've gradually come to realise that I need to know the whole story about something/someone before making any judgment. I can be rigid in my opinions sometimes, but usually it's because I feel that I've gone over it so many times in my head already, and for so long, that I've reached a conclusion that I feel strongly about and am not ready to change just yet. So maybe it's autism being its own enemy? Lack of empathy = difficulty realising that individuals' experiences of the same thing vary = rigid views on how autism affects people other than oneself?

Yes! This is how I view it, too! It's why I get so furious with other people judging me, because of course they haven't spent as much time reviewing the facts as I have! Which is just ridiculous! It's weird, though, having to have two different skill sets: the one where we live our natural lives, and the one where we have to dissect all that using a different context and meaning, in order to function in the NT world...

I've often wondered if this is what it's like to be bilingual in two languages that are completely, totally, fundamentally different. Like English and !Kung. Okay, so I digress, but I find language to be a wonderful metaphor for so many things.

Oops, double post glitch.

Last edited by mv on 27 Jun 2011, 8:49 am, edited 1 time in total.

What frustrates me even more is that usually what other people are saying and pondering on the same subject is stuff that I've already considered, reconsidered, and moved on from. So I get bored and don't want to humour them by pretending I'm at the same stage in the process as them, which my NT acting skills tell me is the right thing to do, haha... So this probably all relates back to people within the spectrum getting on each other's nerves, even about topics related to the spectrum itself. I am firm in my view that it is a disability because that's how it is for me and I know that's how it is for many others, and also my own personal sense of logic tells me that a person who needs disability services to make them no longer disabled IS DISABLED, otherwise they wouldn't need that help. That's just my own way of thinking, and there are people who disagree just as strongly. That is not to say that I see autism as nothing but disability. It's problematic and often disabling, but the traits don't all count as disabling problems, and there is also the fact that some are not disabling traits at all in some circumstances. I just really dislike when someone insist there is nothing disabling about it, as it's not fair on people seeking help for their problems, especially if the rest of the world starts to believe these people who say it's not disabling, because then we'll never get help. I'm rambling a bit, sorry

People with Aspergers do have empathy but express it in a different way to NTs