Just venting...

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Sometimes I have to wonder if its really worth it when I have PTSD, Anxiety, Depression and AS...for one PTSD makes depression and anxiety worse for obvious reasons. As far as i know there is not a cure for PTSD and so basically it sucks and will continue to suck.

I would prefer not to have a flight or fight response any time I am startled. I mean somedays its not so bad, but other days I end up feeling embarrased and self concious about it. I finally figured out what the anxiety attack I had last week was about.......basically the debate in class got a little bit heated and tension in the classroom tends to have that effect due to the PTSD......but yeah for half the class I was sitting there trying to supress the physical symptoms of an anxiety attack which resulted in complete mental numbness that then turned into severe anxiety.......I felt like I needed to get off campus if I wanted to avoid something horrible.

I guess it it just a little hard to deal with the fact that I will most likely have to deal with all that for the rest of my life.

I think PTSD can lessen with time, provided you have removed yourself from the situation that caused it.

Perhaps you have such a hard time with situations you feel you are being attacked, confronted, or questioned in, might be because the emotions from PTSD tend to sit right below the surface and can be stirred up very easily.

You might have PTSD, depression, and anxiety, and you should address things which might be contributing to that, however you shouldn't spend all of your time dwelling on it either. Find some relaxing things that you like to do, things that you enjoy, provided they are legal and not self destructive of course, and be sure to give yourself a some time every week, engaging in those activities.

I think you should also work on building your confidence. With PTSD a major issue for some people is that their emotional fortifications have been destroyed, and I think building confidence serves to rebuild those fortifications.

Well if anything the PTSD has gotten worse, I thought I was fine when I graduated from highschool and went to my first year of college.....well not so much, as much as I did not wanted to be effected that much I was and it's only gotten worse. But yeah there are a number of things that can trigger the PTSD which then can in turn just worsen the depression and anxiety.

I have adressed the things that contribute, but these are not nessisarly situational things......I mean sure if I experiance situational depression I can find a way to improve things but I have Major depression which means I am still depressed even if things are going ok, I think I had anxiety before I got PTSD unless I have had PTSD for longer than I thought due to horrible childhood experiances like even my teachers picking on me and that is what explains the anxiety......but yeah

And it kind of sucks that one of the main things that helps does actually happen to be on the illegal side, but I also listen to music, the other day I did some writing which made me feel a bit better...but that is all just temporary relief it does not change that I will have to deal with it for the rest of my life........as far as I know there is no cure for PTSD, I mean I have more or less come to terms with it but sometimes I just feel like I don't have the energy to continue on with all that working against me.

Also I never really had confidence, at least not that I can remember, so I have no idea how to build any...not that I don't want to but I really don't even know where I would start.